THURSDAY STAFF ROOM

I think it is lovely that a child knows that their parent can spend time without them enjoyably - just as I want my children to enjoy their time without me around.

Isn't it a bit like saying, 'oh, you bad mother why do you go out for the evening and have fun with your friends when you could be at home with me?' rather than 'I love that my mummy has fun with her friends and is all jolly and happy when she comes home - I love being with my friends too!'

Look, Tori wasn't saying that she felt it was wrong for the parents to do whatever they want to during hours that they are paying a minder. Lords knows, I have suggested dozens of times to parents to go off and do whatever they need to do, knowing that their LO is safe and happy with me. She clearly has a parent, who is doing it more and more often and she was just wondering why.

Everyone wants down time from their lo's, I totally understand that, really I do. I would have given my right arm to be able to do the same, at times, when I worked full time, but not al the time! I'm sorry I offended you Hercules, it was me getting arsey with the way the thread was coming down on Tori! I really don't think she deserved such a slating.

Children listen & understand a lot more than people expect (me included)

The number of times I am told of the lovely child free hour/afternoon/day in front of the child in question - you really wouldn't beleive

Do parents go out of their way to tell me they had time off - yes

Do parents have time off not with their children, yes - does it bother me, no - unless it is the day after them complaining that my life must be so easy as I care for my own child and not have to 'farm them out to the childminder' (that's a direct quote btw) & how much they wished they could just spend more time with their children

Perhaps poor old Rita is far closer to the mark than I would have thought!

Well that is not how I read the question from TC - I read it in the same vein as the OP on thread which has been brought over to this one for dissection.

I find it rather sad actually (genuinely) that some of the CMs whom I have a great deal of respect for are proving themselves to be as judgemental as the OP on the other thread

I feel a little naive now at my post on the other thread where I said that the majority of the CMs who posted on here were lovely (and ergo, not judgemental in the way that the OP had been)[stupid emotion]

Katy - the situation you describe is "parents let their children down" not "parents didn't collect their children from me as soon as they finished work when they finished early and their kids had no idea that they were trawling round tescos"

katymac- as far as my son and daughter know they were and will only be picked up at the set time. In fact if we have had to pick dd up early they tend to be a bit miffed as they have planned activities etc.

Sorry but I thought it a valid response to TotalChaos' question

Katy - that is altogether different from the situation being discussed and really doesn't help at all!

Yep
& the ones who tell their 3 or 4 yo that they will collect them after lunch, then turn up at 10 to 6 saying - I just nipped to get my hair done & I had my nails (or whatever) done too

When the child has been sat there (I was unable to distact them for more than a few minutes at a time) crying because Mummy didn't come after lunch

Maureen, it is rude to be rude about someone on a different thread.

I'm a bit puzzled - do the parents go out of their way to tell you they have a half day or something?

How delightful to have met you. Sorry, I assumed that you hadn't intended for your comments on other individual posters to be so public, given the MN philosophy.

Oh leave off! I'm perfectly aware that anyone can read this thread, I couldn't give a rats arse either!

Why on earth would any parent have to make an 'excuse' for having half a day off and not collecting [bizarre emotion]. Why would a CM paid for the whole day (I presume) be the slightest bit interested in what the parent has done?

Sheesh!

It seems there's no need for my views after all! Doncha just love the full moon!

You do know that the rest of MN can read this too, don't you? Maureen, I think that your comment is a bit out of order tbh.

I think she should back out quietly
She won't win
Too many people are being defensive
I know what & why she said it - but I think she has lost

I hope all childminders arent like this. Arsey - charming.

No, you weren't rude at all! It was the £££ that got to me. It was almost like a cartoon character with pound signs in its eyes! Anyway, you've explained youself to her and if she choses to take offence, then so be it. She won't get very far finding a CM, if that is her attitude!

Now then, what shall we do about Tori. I'm wondering about posting on there, saying I do understand, but refusing to talk to anyone else.

That's what I thought (about Tori)

But Rita was I too rude?

Gosh! What a day I've missed! Old Rita is a case, isn't she. I kinda get the pfb bit, but to actually write £££ really made it sound like we earn bundles!

I'm not posting on Toris thread, but I know where she's coming from too! I had a CM once and I readily admit that I used to get off the train, do my shopping and THEN get dd at times. However, I also raced home early to see her too! Trouble is, unless you are a CM, and have had years of parents excuses and reasons for having a half day and not collecting, you can't really comment. Hercules is getting a bit arsey, I reckon because she is guilty of the excuses! Someone else mentioned that their lo doesn't behave as well at home and won't settle, for them to do their jobs. Surely, if you had your kid around more often, you might be able to 'train' them to settle!

Bless Tori, she's gonna get slaughtered!

Calmed down at home at last, that was v hairy.

Hmmm, tori's thread is a bit erm, unfortunate.

Hope you are all fine, see you around the boards

OK. I've found Tori's It kinda jumped out at me on active threads!

See my post of 13.30