Should Granny be allowed to give Grandchild treats?

Good grief @IMustDoMoreExercise - you need to relax more and take a more balanced approach to food. Children don't get obese because they've had an Easter egg, or a cupcake at granny's when they go twice a week.

Kids don't need treats and if their parents dint want them to have them then don't give them. Can't you buy them a comic instead ?

Actually the NHS recommends 3 meals and 2 snacks a day, they just recommend healthy ones (so not chocolate bars, crisps, biscuits like OP wants to give).

I meant most adults are overweight in the UK, not obese, although 25% are obese which is bad enough.

Hopefully they will be laughing when they don't get diabetes or become obese like most adults in the UK.

And if they have to eat between meals, it needs to be a healthy snack not rubbish.

But times have changed. We now know how bad sugar is for kids and we now have an obesity and diabetes crisis.

How many people are obese or have diabetes because chocoates, crisps and other unhealthy "treats" became normalised as an everyday (and often multiple times per day) occurence?

Kids should not eat between meals.

Where does the OP say the parents of the child are principally fine with the DC having small occasional appropriate treats?

I can see how this has transpired, the OP seems to have a very warped view of what is suitable for a 1 year old. The parents of the child are principally fine with the DC having small occasional appropriate treats but knows the OP's approach and views so they choose to give the treats them self.

I’m sure they’ll find your senses of humor a right laugh.

Amen!

Good grief.

You think they'll ONLY like you for the Easter Egg? As I said upthread, my kids have lovely memories of their grandma 'spoiling them' as children. But it wasn't about the treats, it was about the absolute unconditional love she had for them, which she showed in many ways. One of which was sharing her own love of chocolate!

She lived a few hours away, and when they'd get a random bar of chocolate through the post from her, they felt loved and thought of.

Amazingly they're healthy eating adults, and they know how to love, because they've been so generously loved themselves.

Not even an Easter egg? Bloody hell ☹️ You know they will see you as more than a bar of chocolate if you give them one (or many), right?

I am a grandmother myself and I will never give my grandkids crisps, chocolates etc (not even Easter eggs) because I dont' want them to like me just for giving them unhealthy "treats".

I don't care what their parents give them as it is beyond my control.

Makes a miserable Saturday afternoon

Should Apples etc only be used as treats? If they are part of a normal diet they are no more treats than bread, meat or cheese ....so just call it a snack ....but what your not getting is dad walks in grabs the biscuits and stuffs one in the child's hands the very biscuit he would have taken the child away from granny for giving an hour earlier. That's the shitty thing.

I agree with this.

Why can't the "treats" be apples, bananas etc?

You should not be giving kids crisps and chocolates and certainly not for good behaviour.

Agree. Sounds stressful all round.

If he doesn't trust the OP's judgement on this then the best thing for him to do is to look for paid childcare that he trusts then.

That all sounds like you want to give a lot of treats for a 1 year old.

Squash isn't a good option for a baby, grapes are obviously problematic, as is giving a sharp kebab stick to a 1 year old. It seems that you want to give a bag of crisps and a chocolate bar every time you have the child plus squash to drink. I wouldn't be happy with this either. I expect it's your approach to treats (including for bribery) that is leading to your DS having much strict rules and regulations wanting to allow the treats himself. I don't think he trusts your judgement on it at all. I wouldn't either.

It’s normal to have some requests. Eg I would rather my daughter drinks only water or milk. But there’s a nice way to put it. “If you can’t respect our wishes we will look into alternate childcare” is a shitty way of talking to a grandparent. it’s not just the money they’re saving, their children are having golden time with grandma.

let them use a nursery, cheeky so and sos.

Amen ..100%agree! My children were given grandma treats and they still talk about her with so much love ❤️

It's really not the point though, is it? The son and DIL are treating OP abominably. And THEY give their son treats, so it's not about healthy eating. It's about control. They want to be the ones who get the kudos from their kid when he had a biscuit. But grandma isn't allowed.

FFS, son comes to pick him up from OP's house and promptly gives him the snack that OP isn't allowed to! In her house, in front of her! That's some kind of controlling power play.

When they were little our girls were looked after by granny if necessary. We never worried about it as she raised me and though I say it myself she did well😀. We now look after the grandchildren as needed and we don't get instructions from the mums unless they're not well. I hope they think we did a good enough job of raising them to trust us with their children.

Granny’s goody cupboard sounds like an absolute dream for a young kid. Or anyone, for that matter. To me, grandparents are there to enjoy their grandkids, to make coming to visit them exciting and associated with bending the rules a bit. It’s a shame your son can’t see that.