So against all my better judgement (see earlier threads) I am preparing to CONSIDER a nanny with her own child, please advise me what to think about...

Does the nanny have experience of caring for multiples - as two children same/similar age are very much like twins and will fight for attention.
Is nanny used to having care of 2+ children (preferably 4 or more)? Some nannies only seem to work for families with 1 child, and think that by being with that family for several years they have lots of experience. In fact they have little experience as they have experience of only one child. Good nannies will have experience of caring for lots of children over the years, in differing age groups. Don't go for a nanny who only has experience of working for families where there is just one child... make sure they have more experience than that, and ideally as the children are close in age, experience of working with twins.

Food can be a real issue, especially if say your child is vegetarian and the nannies child is a meat eater.

meet her and talk by all means... but this is fraught with difficulty. if the dc's are the same age there will almost certainly be periods of rivalry and conflict..... my problem would be it blurs the boundaries.... nanny's job should be to put your dc's interests first at all times (but is this realistic if those interests conflict with her child's? nanny's job is to follow your instructions about how dc's are to be cared for (discipline / eating etc),even if her personal views are different.... is this realistic? but what ithe illness thing is a biggie too....and two small people trashing YOUR living room... think v carefully won' t you?

By the way, I'm quite paranoid about things like this, but I wouldn't ask about whether she's planning another child soon.

flowery
I met with a woman recently, more for ad hoc care, who has a child. She was lovely and it did make me consider whether I could change my mind too.

Scheduling would have proved a big problem with the arrangement - we need someone who can come early, and with say a couple hours' notice (sometimes less) stay late due to our jobs. Sometimes over an hour. It was clear this wouldn't work with the nanny and child. I would want to know how flexible she could be on hours, given her own child's schedule.

Secondly, when it came to activities, while it was great that our kids were compatible ages, her daughter was going to be going to a preschool in a completely different part of town to ours. Wasn't clear how she would manage that. If your arrangement is long term(don't know how old your child is), is there anything similar which could come up and be an issue?

If you are paying full nanny rates, you shouldn't have to compromise on anything, in my opinion. Compromise means a nanny share and therefore a discount. I personally wouldn't let her talk you round this.

Flowery where are you based?

I have often been asked in interviews about my plans for having babies. I don't think it'd be too out of line to ask her.

I'm 27, comign up to 28 and live with my boyfriend. People do ask... "if you like kids so much, aren't you thinking about having some of your own?"

It seems even more reasonable to ask somoene who already has a child if she's planning another. Of course, she won't admit it happily if she is ("Yeah, I figured - work for you for a year then get maternity pay while I pop out another one...") but you can probably read between the lines.

I guess a lot depends on the age of your DC, my 2 year old charge is at the age where he is playing very considerately with others, but he does have older siblings...

Oooh just thought of another one!

How does her little one react when they have to share her time and attention with another child?

Does she find it challenging juggling the needs and demands of her child, with those of another she is taking care of?

conflict between your child & hers (not now but later)
conflict between your rules for your son & her rules for her son
Will she wake her child to take your child out (to something you have arranged eg toddler group/dentist appt)
What if her child is allowed/not allowed food that your child is

The fact she was so up front is a big plus IMHO.

Yes there are potential pit-falls but if you both sit down & thrash them out(as she seems willing to do) then if she is as good as you feel she is try it out?

Would she still expect fullpay? Not sure how this works wages wise?

You need to address/discuss things like:

What would happen if her child were ill?
What kind of salary is she expecting?
Would she provide food, nappies etc for her child
Has she taken her child to work with her before? If so what were the advantages, disadvantages and issues?

Well you can't ask her, but I would wonder - what if she has another!