Should I take toddler to MIL appointment?

I don't get it.....
Your last week of work and exhausted why doesn't he know this is he helping you when he gets in and you put your feet up?
Why can't you tell him a 4 to 5 hour day for toddler being board is not going to work and your parents can't cope with caring for him, and your sister like his siblings is working?
Don't you speak?

Do not agree to this- once you do it once, you’ll be on the hook for future requests.

One day you’ll wake up and realise you can’t remember the last time your DH lifted a finger for one of these lifts or errands as it’ll have drip-dip-dripped into becoming your responsibility.

You need to tell your husband you can't do it. Are you too scared to tell him? How would he react?

It doesn't matter what she expects; you are an adult and have a voice and a choice. And multiple reasons not to take her.

If she must have an attendant at the appointment some other family member or friend must take her. Or, she must change her appt to a time that suits her escort. She might have to be nicer to the relatives she had a row with.

DH can take unpaid leave.

Sounds like your DH, his siblings and his mum are CF! Fancy thinking that the person who is 8 months pregnant, with a toddler who is still working, is the person to drive this woman around! Why can’t she get the public transport or someone else take her?

I’d develop twinges and refuse to drive.

FFS. Grow a backbone and just say no. One of her children can take her.

Your inability to have a direct conversation with your husband is a much much bigger issue here. Why don't you feel able to tell him what you think and feel?

My view - even if you had perfect childcare, a 3 hour round trip is a big ask for someone who is 36 weeks pregnant, even if they didn't have history of early labour.

And what you do for your parents is totally irrelevant unless your husband also regularly ferries them to their appointments. And even then you'd be entitled to say 'sorry, no can do on this occasion because of the whole 36 weeks pregnant thing.'

But really - what happens if you talk to him?

Sounds like a DWP/benefits assessment appointment. She might want to say she needed accompanying/couldn’t manage on her own/get public transport. Children are absolutely not allowed in those appointments.

But anyway, you’ve got a history of early labour and you’re 36 weeks and you want to drive 90mins away and put yourself in a stressful position? Take your notes and hospital bag.
sounds like lots of issues with your parents and DH around you being out and about to each extreme.

If you do go then park or soft play.

@Glo1988 my thoughts exactly

What if you went into labour early?

So what does he do for your parents?

Why can't she take a taxi? Surely that's cheaper than a 3 hour round trip? Or at least easier. If she's still working surely she can sort herself out?

You need to point out to your DH and his entitled family that you could actually go into labour on the journey with your toddler in the back of the car! What would actually happen then? Your MIL sounds like such a cheeky cow she would probably still expect you to get her to her appointment about her work shyness! I feel rage on your behalf, there is no way on this earth I would take her to her appointment in your shoes.

No it doesn't fall on you. If neither he nor any of his siblings can find the time for this why don't they book a car and driver for the afternoon?

Its not your problem either, if you take her but she has to attend alone - again, many other adults in the scenario with actual responsibilities.

Why are you worried about saying this to your husband? Does he get arsey if you don't fall in with his commands?

This. Why can't they pay for a taxi for her?

I'd tell your husband that you'll take MIL to her appointment but he needs to book a babysitter for the toddler as you're not taking them too.

her 4 children should be clubbing together to pay for a taxi for her. it's really inappropriate for them to be passing the buck to you at a time like this.

Does he ever take your parents? No? There you go. If there's no reciprocity, just what exactly is your obligation to be his/his family's doormat?

How often does he ferry your parents around, OP?

I’ll wait.

(This is utter batshittery.)

Just don't feel guilty then.

I don't understand.

'Can you take MIL to the hospital hours away'

'Not really love, I'm quite heavily pregnant and have a toddler with me.'

Job done.

Stop hinting, wondering and imagining and have an actual conversation with your H
If you can’t t.hen you have a problem

Fucking wife work! Cheeky twat. We have a similar situation at my work, dil wanting time off because son “can’t deal with his dad (in this case)”. What is it with lazy arsed men today?

Honestly, I wouldn't be doing that in your position. Think I'd say I.dont feel great, and no-one can baby sit. I'm sorry but I can't do it.

I’d assumed it was an elderly MIL.
As it’s not, and in your current circumstances I’d say no. She can either get public transport or her own dc can take he.
stop hinting at your DH and tell him
clearly that you won’t be taking his DM to or from this appointment.

Unless your MIL is sick at this very moment or likely to be given bad news, she doesn't need to be accompanied by anyone