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Original poster

Chased for notice term fees

31 replies

Lost1982 · 21/11/2022 16:46

Hi All, Need your help.We moved to UK couple of months back and enrolled our daughter in an independent school here. A few weeks into the school, my daughter was bullied by fellow students and also witnessed racist comments. Obviously, my teenage DD was extremely upset and become a loner. I did highlight this to the school, but the school stated they can only do anything about it if we name the girls who were involved. My DD was extremely petrified to name the girls since she felt they would trouble her more. The school did not bother to call us, nor did it provide my daughter counselling to get out of this incident post their 1 mail asking for the girls' names. There was also security issues in the school, and my daughter was left stranded in the school by the transport number of times since the activities teacher did not inform the transport team that the activity was cancelled for that specific day. At one instance, my daughter was untraceable after her activities club post school - which the school managed - we tried calling the teachers, school, activity coach but none of them responded. In fact the activities club receptionist told us my daughter was not there, while she was all the time there in the club in the basement practicing. Horrified, we did then got in touch with police helpline. Thankfully, by then, my daughter called, and we got her back home. After witnessing the above, we withdrew her from the school since the school was not bothered, nor concerned for the well being of my daughter. I informed the school in July that we are withdrawing her from the school. The school is now following up with us for their terms notice fee around 10K for the same. We had a really bad experience with the school, and it took months for my daughter to come out of this trauma. We understand this as per contract, but it seems extremely unfair that you are tortured and then expected to pay for the torture. Please advise since we are too new to this and not sure how to take this ahead.

OP posts:
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Twizbe · 21/11/2022 18:01

You signed the contract so you're held to the terms.

TomTraubertsBlues · 21/11/2022 17:58

LIZS · 21/11/2022 17:05

Thought she would be younger from your description. Assuming she has a phone the cancellation of an activity would be expected to be communicated by your dd. Most 15yo are pretty independent, There would be a complaints process to the trustees, so you could appeal to them for a fee waiver in the circumstances but chances are they will still insist.

Me too. Your references to her being stranded made her sound like a much younger child.

Autumnisclose · 21/11/2022 17:57

Let's look at these incidents separately;

  1. The bullying - what were the school meant to do if your daughter wouldn't say who was involved ?
  2. The school have no obligation to provide counselling for an alleged incident of bullying they have been unable to investigate or deal with. Surely it's your job to arrange counselling if you think it's needed?
  3. Your daughter observing a racist incident - she's 15 , surely she's heard these things before. Not great, but if it wasn't aimed at her personally why the drama?
  4. The transport not available on the days the activity was cancelled - surely she wasn't the only one in that position. Its not clear who is responsible for arranging transport if this happens. If it's the school the they should have sorted it. But it's a minor issues overall and I would expect a 15 year old to go and speak to someone to ask.
  5. Going missing during an activity after school - presumably your daughter was there at a time you would expect given she was still practicing the activity? . I'm not sure why you called the police though so maybe it was significantly past the time she was meant to be there ? If so, the onus is on your daughter to tell you she's staying late.

None of the above mean you should wriggle out of paying the fees if thats what the contract says.

You sound rather dramatic. Your daughter is 15 and you need to stop babying her.

WakingUpDistress · 21/11/2022 17:53

It’s not just the bullying isn’t it?
it’s also the very low level of safety, transport etc…..

I think you have two options

  • pay (and you’ll have ample opportunities to tell people how crap the school has been anyway) and draw a line under it all. That way everyone, and esp your dd, can move on from a crap experience.
  • review the contract in particular the breech of contract. Yes you should be paying this term if you haven’t told them early enough. But at the same time, they’ve made numerous mistakes and might well be in breech of their own requirements. So I’d review that first and foremost.
WonderingWanda · 21/11/2022 17:41

Honestly this reads like along list of little niggles that you are trying to use to get it of paying the fees. Ultimately, had you given the names of the bullies the bisque would have been dealt with and your daughter wouldn't be experiencing such 'trauma' as you describe it.

Ciri · 21/11/2022 17:21

You are liable for the fees. How could they do anything if you wouldn’t name those involved?

And your daughter is 15 for goodness sake, not five.

Original poster
Lost1982 · 21/11/2022 17:18

Sure I understand the viewpoint for all of you. Thanks for it. I will speak to the school and sort this out.

OP posts:
LittleBearPad · 21/11/2022 17:18

You’re going to have to pay

SavingKitten · 21/11/2022 17:16

Lost1982 · 21/11/2022 17:16

So in their school, if you have take the school transport, you have to give a day's notice. Since the activity was cancelled last minute by the sports teacher, at times due to bad weather or other school backing out of the competition or the after school activity getting cancelled the transport was not given.

But that doesn’t excuse 10k of fees

Original poster
Lost1982 · 21/11/2022 17:16

So in their school, if you have take the school transport, you have to give a day's notice. Since the activity was cancelled last minute by the sports teacher, at times due to bad weather or other school backing out of the competition or the after school activity getting cancelled the transport was not given.

OP posts:
amiold · 21/11/2022 17:15

Lost1982 · 21/11/2022 17:07

@Amiold, Seriously, the world is round, hoping this comes back to you someday. You don't know her to even comment this ways. But nevertheless, wishing you the Best.

You are being unreasonable

If it happened she should have proved it. Then you wouldn't be in the position of not wanting to pay your bill (you should have also confirmed position when you removed her from the school you had signed her up to)

NCFT0922 · 21/11/2022 17:14

You have to pay. This is how it works. You signed a contract, you accepted their terms and conditions and now you pay. They will take you to court if you don’t.

Pythonese · 21/11/2022 17:12

Seek legal advice.

MelchiorsMistress · 21/11/2022 17:11

If your dd is 15, I think you are being unrealistic in your expectation that they should know exactly where she is at all times. She does need to take some responsibility for herself at her age.

Have the school ever said they offer free counselling after incidents of bullying? What gave you the impression that they should? I think you need to work on getting your dd to name the people who have bullied her. The school can’t do anything to stop a child behaving badly if they don’t know who that child is.

Luckyducker · 21/11/2022 17:09

The after schools thing is odd. Since my eldest started high school at 12 I have expected her to contact me if an after school activity is cancelled and she needs transport or to wait for her transport. At 15 it is crazy to expect the school to be ringing you to sort out transport. Could she not just have done her homework at school until her usual transport was due? It seems she went ahead and practiced by herself so no bother to her. She is 15 and can cope with netball being cancelled.

The racist comments are unacceptable and the school should have addressed them whether they had names or not by making it clear to all that they would not be tolerating racism.

Hoppinggreen · 21/11/2022 17:08

Sounds like your DD has had a tough time but without naming the girls there isn’t much they can do,
My DD was bullied at Private school at that age and the people involved were named - one was expelled, one had a final warning and two had to sign good behaviour contracts. There was no counselling offered to bough
As for the activity your DD should have contacted you.
I dont think you really have any solid grounds here for refusing to pay unfortunately

Original poster
Lost1982 · 21/11/2022 17:07

@Amiold, Seriously, the world is round, hoping this comes back to you someday. You don't know her to even comment this ways. But nevertheless, wishing you the Best.

OP posts:
LIZS · 21/11/2022 17:05

Thought she would be younger from your description. Assuming she has a phone the cancellation of an activity would be expected to be communicated by your dd. Most 15yo are pretty independent, There would be a complaints process to the trustees, so you could appeal to them for a fee waiver in the circumstances but chances are they will still insist.

Floralnomad · 21/11/2022 17:03

They will go as far as court , they nearly always do , you could try negotiating a reduction .

Original poster
Lost1982 · 21/11/2022 17:02

I was hoping they could have atleast counselled my DD, spoken to her, followed up on how she is doing. Rather than just dropping the hat, since we dint name the girls.

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amiold · 21/11/2022 17:02

You can't just not pay 😂

Your daughter give them no proof that the bullying and racism happened even though they give the opportunity.

They didn't follow up because you were unwilling to back up what you said and your daughter thinks it's acceptable to go awol... to which you blamed the school. Probably sick of it after one term

RedHelenB · 21/11/2022 17:01

Lost1982 · 21/11/2022 16:55

Yes we did go through the complaints process, they stated they can only do something if we name the girls. My DD is 15.

Well they're right. Doesn't sound the best school, but neither does it sound really terrible. You have agreed to pay the notice period so I can't see how you can avoid paying it.

Hellocatshome · 21/11/2022 16:59

What action do you think they should have taken without the names of the children involved? You owe them the fees. I think your use of the word torture is overly dramatic and potentially not helping your case whilst talking to the school about your concerns.

SavingKitten · 21/11/2022 16:59

Lost1982 · 21/11/2022 16:55

Yes we did go through the complaints process, they stated they can only do something if we name the girls. My DD is 15.

What did you expect them to do as she wouldn’t name the girls? I think if you’ve signed a contract you will have to pay unfortunately.

Eleusa · 21/11/2022 16:57

I'd write back outlining what you have said here and saying that the school failed to provide a reasonable standard of care for your daughter, in breach of an implied term of your contract with them. If they have an anti-bullying policy, explain how they failed to apply it. If the bullying was racist, explain this as well. Tell them that you consider their failures to constitute a repudiatory breach of contract and therefore no notice payment is due. If they push back, I'd see a solicitor who specialises in disputes with private schools.