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Paid childcare

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Original poster

Dislike MIL but she's offering free childcare

57 replies

Sipsupsip · 16/09/2022 20:47

The relationship between MIL and I broke down a couple of years ago. I have almost nothing to do with her. I had a baby about 9 months ago and we are thinking about childcare solutions for my return to work.
MIL has offered to have him for a couple of days a week. She really does love the baby and sees him for a couple of hours on Saturdays and Sundays when DH goes to visit her.
Additional info: DH currently pays for MILs bills and rent as she has no other income.
So, in theory we could afford full time nursery childcare but can't really due to this expense.

So, my question to you wise MNeters... What issues do you foresee in this set up? Am I mad?
Logistically DH would do drop off and pickups.
Ta

OP posts:
Pallisers · 16/09/2022 21:00

That childcare won't be free - even discounting that your dh is already paying for it in cash. You'll pay in spades for it.

I cannot imagine leaving my child with someone I dislike so much I have cut most contact with her.

britneyisfree · 16/09/2022 20:57

Depends on why. I wouldn't leave my baby with someone I don't like but depends on why you fell out

JMPB · 16/09/2022 20:54

I think it depends why you dont speak with her.

if you have no concerns leaving child with her and DH can do the pickups I don’t see why she shouldn’t have DC.

Wardrobemalfunction22 · 16/09/2022 20:54

Have you thought about what happens if she gets ill and/or can't do childcare on the days she has offered? What about if she changes her mind once your baby gets more of a handful e.g. terrible twos and beyond? How would you discuss what is appropriate in terms of discipline, food, exercise, tv, days out etc etc

Unless you can repair your relationship with your MIL you're taking a huge risk imo

HairyMothballs · 16/09/2022 20:53

You don't like the woman and don't speak to her, but would happily use her for childcare? As for your husband paying the rent and bills for his mum - isn't she able to work at all? Doesn't she get any type of benefits?

Everylittlethingsgonnabealright · 16/09/2022 20:51

No way. Stop paying her bills - you and DH need to look after your own household first, then any extra can go towards helping others.

Donotgogentle · 16/09/2022 20:49

No way would I put a baby in the care of someone I had such a poor relationship with.

Trust and communication are absolutely key.

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