Irritating things that au pairs/nannies do...

Absolutely. She was lucky not to be dragged out of bed and chucked out along with all her possessions.

I've no intentions of paying her. She owes me £44 for phone calls last month (compared to £4 for DH & I), and £73 for her plane ticket. We'll just call it quits, methinks.

She's obviously driven you mad! The champagne will get you back to normal!

I wouldn't pay her.

Sorry, but that's outrageous negligence.

I'd have been tempted to smuggle the kids out of the house, leave them at a neighbours, and then ask her where they were!

(But I am a cow!)

No I haven't - ignore last post. Truly mad now.

Sorry - I've just repeated myself - duh, going mad!

She's going tomorrow!

Champagne chilling as we speak...

I'm dismissing her a week earlier than planned because - wait for this one - last week, she was babysitting in the evening. DH came home early to find all my kids up and running wild, and the au pair in the shower. DH didn't have his key, so he had to knock to be let in - by my seven year old. Au pair came out of the shower eventually and went straight to bed, never checking on the children and totally oblivious to the fact that there was another adult in the house.

I agree with Uwila. Or is she going anyway?

I think I'd hand of a written warning for that one. Letting her know that if it continued it risked getting her dismissed.

I had an pair last summer who did similar things. The part that made me the madest was when she would giggle like it was funny that she had gotten caught. Used to infuriate me!

Au pair doozy of the day:

I came home with my older kids from school and was taking ages to unpack the car, so DS knocked on the door to be let in. No answer. He knocked again and still no answer. Au pair was sitting on the couch (curtains open, lights on, so in full view of the street) chatting on the phone.

When I got in, I asked her if she heard the door - no answer, continued chatting. I ended up taking the phone out of her hand and told the caller she'd get back to them once she finished working. She proceeded to call them back three times, giggling as they answered.

With the threat of wages docked, she has finally got the message about her time and mine. I wouldn't have taken it so far if she hadn't blatantly ignored DS.

Luggage stunt would not sit well with me either. I don't pay for flights to other countries, and I accept no responsibility for getting them any further than the exterior of my front door.

My nanny would never assume someone could stay in our house. She did just have her daughter over for a couple of nights (daughter is 28), but I offered. We don't pay her a lot (because we can't afford to) so I try to give her some perks here and there that don't cost a lot of money. And, it didn't cost me anything to have her daughter over.

I just can't believe she wanted you to buy her new luggage. Let me guess. Is she young? I had a young nanny who thought I was suppose to provide for her whenever she could establish her need. It had nothing to do with whether she had earned it. I, on the other hand, was and am of the view that my nanny deserves what she has earned, and I do not take on parental responsibilites for anyone other than my offspring (and sometimes DH)

Tanzie - what a cheek about luggage.

Our current A-P announced her sister and husband were coming to stay for 5 nights. I did'nt realize at the time, she thought they would automatically stay with us. She would give up her double room, and sleep in the box room. she then started to ask me about the sofa bed.

I did'nt click for a few days and kept commenting on how nice it would be for her, ect ect. In the meantime i had got some information for her about local hotels, all with a 2 mile radius. She looked at me as if I had said something terrible... then i realized, they were in fact suppose to stay with us at Hotel Hattiel!!! In the end sister did'nt come, they though Hotel and B& B too expensive.

I did say to her when she started that she was welcome to have her friends over ( meaning local friends who will leave at night fall). Also ANother A-P in the area had told her how previous A-P sister came to stay for 4 weeks ( when really it should have only been for 10 days). It was not an ideal situaton X and sister kept falling out causing a lot of tension.

Tanzie, I dont think anything negative about you at all. I have to agree that as in every other profession or area of life there is good and bad.

I also agree that childcare generally is very expensive and disorganised ona whole, we need more government provision and funding in the UK. We just dont seem to have our act together as well as some of our other European counterparts with regard to childcare provision and allowing people to live and enjoy a quality of life whilst safe in the knowledge that they have quality childcare provided that is not financially crippling.

Isnt it just sods law that on the whole the people that can best afford a nanny without feeling the pinch, treat them like crap. Whilst the 'normal' family muddling through and doing their best may get landed with the tempeamental nanny from hell? Go figure. Maybe some nannies are intimadated into good behaviour by the extravagantly rich and not so bothered anywhere else?

I have actually taken a significant paycut to be with the 'normal' down-to-earth family! Socialites can stick their job

Tanzie, you poor hing, you really seemto get them. If i could put our ex-nanny on a plane/train I would but the jammy moo has found a new job paying at least 25% mre than we paid her her for a 3 day week (plus some sat/sun work occassionally).

I agree that the richer the family the worse they treated their nanny. We were the poorest family we knew and didn't really pay market rate, but because of this we always tried to compensate with extra time off never coming home late (maybe once or twice a year!) or we fixed someelse to come in and take over, and paid extra for any babysitting/overtime we needed. Some of her nanny friends friends were treated really badly, the point being hat the employers life is far far more important than the nannies!!

Well, I'm not so bad now, thank-god! I have aquired a little restraint and will power!

But I still think its best to keep all treats away from my eye, hand or mouth level

I'm expecting my own in March and have developed more a sweet tooth these days, not so much chocolate more chewies and fizzy drinks. I'm terrible.

Tamula, I'd love to have an au-pair/ nanny with a secret chocolate eating habit! It would mean that the kids' teeth would be safe, and I wouldn't be able to eat it either!

Hello all,

This thread is hilarious, I have really laughed and laughed about some of the things posted

I have been a nanny for about 8 years but worked in childcare for near 12. I have worked with and learnt from some amazing mothers and their families and have always kept in touch with the good ones, but by jove have I also come across the neurotic power mad career mothers . If it wasnt for my placid and patient demeanour I could have comitted murder, the children were always delightful and the mothers, NOT fathers, terrible.

I am a qualified professional person and I have to say the wealthier the family is the worst the mum is and more you feel like the hired hand that aint worth a dime.

They would try to make me work without paying my tax or NI. - Who do you think needed it most me or them?

One lady was home late every single day without exception and then would expect a thorough breakdown of our day, alhough that she had already rung 4 times through the day and I kept a very detailed diary, I never left less than 30 mins late each day.

She would make unreasonable demands on me and be cross if I said no, like suggesting that I stay the night on no notice as she wouldnt be back until 11pm so what would be the point in me going home?! Like I have no life.

I actually have a rule now whereby I will not work for the obscenely wealthy as they are nothing but a pain in the jacksy At the time I would have had a list of complaints as long as my arm but I guess I have chosen to forget most of all that.

I think the problem some of you mothers have is that you hire au-pairs! Au-pairs are NOT nannies, legally they are just foreign students wanting to study here whilst lodging with a family and mucking in with the household chores and childcare, but I know for a fact that many mothers exploit them and have them work like slaves for some thing like £40 per week in exchange for food and lodging, I would argue that if you pay peanuts you get monkeys!

In the jobs I enjoyed I was a thoroughly respected member of the family who knew all members of the family far and wide and I still am. Many mothers have told me that they dont know how i manage to do everything and that they look forward to work and me on the Monday morning! hahaha!

I am not insulted by any of the posts I have read, they're very entertaining.

I will though admit to one flaw in my nanny perfectness I have always been addicted to chocolate and both of my dearest families knew this, so they quite literally had to hide the kids chocolate, but alas not very well. If I was desperate I would search for it and I very rarely didnt find it. Of course the kids and parents would chastise me after the event, which was actually quite embarrassing. One time to make up for my no-good-chocolate-eating-behaviour, for a crimbo pressie I bought the kids one of those HUGE Cadbury bars of milk chocolate, anyways they went away for cristmas so didnt have time to eat it, so guess who polished it off during the month of January? They still call me the chocolate fiend!! haha.

I don't know why i did'nt think of the list in the kitchen for A-P and Kids. Good idea!!

Even if i have to do translation. A-P left me a note the other day saying 'The jingle not working so mr fix it not come'

translation ' the door bell is not working so the man did not fix the washing machine'

she does try

I don't know the history of Tanzie's au-pair - just thought perhaps the a-p doesn't know how to make a list & could do with showing. Sort of if you see milk is all used up write milk here on the board/paper/tick box - what ever. Fix a piece of chalk/pen to board so no excuse for losing pen. Could even bulk buy loo paper, milk, tins etc to avoid some of this. Just my experience

Oh, and I don't run out to the store that day to buy things 'cause people forgot to tell me they needed it. I go to the store onec, maybe twice, per week. If you need it before then, you'll have to go get it yourself.

How is Tanzie going to make the list when she isn't there when things are used up. I've been communicating to my nanny (and DH) this very same message recently. I think I've got the message through now. If you use it up, put it on the list. If you don't put it on the list, I may or may not notice that I need to buy it.

Would it help if you made a shopping list for her to help her get organised?