Night nannie for disabled new mum

Wow. So glad ivf worked

Age is a number

I was almost 44

I’m a maternity night nanny. Charges vary £18/22ph depending where job is

If I have to travel an hour plus then it’s slightly higher rate to bring in travelling time

I usually do 10hr nights

I wouldn’t agree to half a night as not worth my while not do I want to be driving at 11pm

Totally get the sleep deprivation for yourself. Esp with a medical condition

What area are you in ?

Don’t know if sd would pay tbh

I have epilepsy and had social services involved as I had a abusive ex who I called the police on. I was actually scared as ex always threatened I wouldn’t be able to keep my child as I have epilepsy so different to your situation.

They were helpful but definitely no offer of nannies or help like that. What they did do is help me get a care alarm so I press a button and get emergency response quick. Helped fit a key safe so the emgancy respond can’t enter my home without scaring my child. They also helped me get a fall alarm so if I fall and have a seizure the emergency alarm would be activated.

I also slept whilst my child slept to make sure I had the maximum sleep. I know how hard it can be it’s very scary . I’m sure you know how to keep your child safe like changing on the floor etc. I hope it all goes well for you and you get the support you need but I don’t see social services doing Much at all. Although I didn’t want them to so I may be wrong.

Like others are suggesting I think many couples split the night so that each of you are getting a decent chunk of uninterrupted sleep.

I suspect GPs / social workers will be unwilling to fund a night nanny though. I think they’d suggest shared parental leave so that your partner cares for the baby whilst you return to work.

@hulligwen yes what drspouse said. So you get 3 hours solid sleep, he brings baby to bed with him (hasn't got to be midnight if you can sleep in a different room) and then he does the wake ups. If baby has a feed at 11 then there's theoretically one feed at 2. You then get baby for the 5 am feed and keep til you both wake up. You've got 7 hours solid. DH gets 7 hours with a wake up.

I think sleeping means
DH on duty 9-12, OP asleep.
If baby wakes 12-5 DH goes to baby.
If baby wakes 5-8 OP goes to baby.
But that doesn't seem like it will work really.

I'd have loved a night nanny when my DS was little. Could you get one for a couple of nights a week and go to bed when DH gets home so you get a proper chunk of sleep?

@SleepingStandingUp

Because people always speak to Mumsnet the way they speak to your children.

Deeply unpleasant post to a poster who presumably was saving a terminally ill child.

A saviour sibling. I hope it worked out for all of you @Creepygnochi

UCO

52, technically.

IVF, of course. The biological material was leftovers from genetic testing in my 30s. I wouldn't recommend having a baby so late, but we needed cord blood, had the gametes on ice, could afford to do it, so thought fuck it.

No experience of night nannies but I had twins who seemed to sleep in alternate hourly shifts.

We split the nights - one of us would do 7pm- 1 and the other 1-7am.

Could you do this and find a nanny for a few hours during the day so you can get extra rest?

Why is it 11 years down the line I’m discovering you can get night nurses? Good god I wouldn’t look as old as I do if i knew this magic service was available.

Is contact GP/Health visitor and see what help or advice they can give you, do you have any family close by that can support you in the day until you get something sorted?

As others have said, they are £100-150 per night depending on where you are and how long the booking is for.

I’ve not heard of one that would do midnight to 7am. They like to have a handover before and after each shift to share details on feeds and nappies etc

If this is beyond your finances, you could get some daytime help and use that time to sleep. Maybe 3 hours during the day would give you time for a proper nap and would be around £40 per day

I’m totally at how you didn’t think having a new born would result in some level of sleep deprivation though. It’s probably the most famously obvious part of new parenthood

I have epilepsy and lack of sleep is also a trigger.

I slept as soon as DP got home at 6pm through to the 4am feed (DP did the 8pm and midnight feed).

We were extremely lucky with a baby that fed every 4 hours and who, by 2.5 months was sleeping 7 to 7am.

I feel for you, first time mum and dealing with epilepsy as well. Is the sleep deprivation trigger a new thing then? You've discovered since the baby was born?

Also keep in mind, you'll need to supply nightnurse with a bed. They sleep between feds as well.

No idea about night nannies but with DD DH did 8pm - midnight and I did midnight to 6am. Because of DD’s sleep patterns it meant that I’d sleep 8pm-2am at least and DH 10pm-6am (and I’d also sleep after the 2am feed). Any use for you?

Why don't you have your medication reviewed. Also contact an epilepsy support group. Who might have some suggestions on how to cope with a new born.

What was your plan in the day for if you had a seizure without warning and you were with the baby alone?

Between £12-20 an hour is probably about right, depending on where you live etc.
You need a spare bedroom or a bed in the baby’s room for the nanny.
Most will do 7pm-7pm or 9pm-7am for example, I don’t think midnight will work.

You could try contacting maternity nanny training providers to see if they have any students who want to do work experience in exchange for a reference? MNT, Nest, BabyEm are some of the main training providers.

You're unlikely to get a night nanny to come in at midnight. They usually have standard overnight hours and won't much fancy starting a job at that time. Mostly they intend to get as much sleep as they can as many of them are heading off to a day job, unless you're employing them 5+ nights a week. £100-120 a night is probably pretty standard.

I'd think it's unlikely you'll get someone else to fund this for you, but you can but ask.

I have a night nanny with my baby at the moment, because I'm 53 this year and have done 11 other children (including two sets of twins) without one, so decided I was done doing nights now. She does all the training and brings dd to me to feed then takes her back. On duty from 10pm until 8am, £220 a night. It's fabulous, wish I'd done it sooner.

Contact ss, the worst they can is say no.