Advice needed - Nanny does not speak same language bas children

I see a lot of people give an advice but clearly most if then did not grow up bilingual or trilingual etc.

I am bilingual from early years and english is my 4th language which Iearmed as an adult.

We know live in uk. My 4yo is fully bilingual. We do not speak English to him at all. We send him to nursery 2 days a week at 2.5 with zero english. He started to understand english within 2 month and after 4 month started to talk in english. He is now talks english at the same level as other 4yo by going to nursery only 2 days a week.
We still only talk minority language with our boy.

With children that age OP you just ralk to them normaly as you would talk to any child and they will pick up the language very quickly. Just play with them show them things and name them. Read to them. Use loads of picture books, point and say words.

Preschoolers learn languages naturaly as babies learn. You don’t haveto teach them language. Just talk to them and they will learn.

Best of luck!

There are loads of good advice if you read up about bilingualism.

They are quite a notable family in south America and Italy

Not notable enough to pay proper rates for proper staff though.

As for learning the language discreetly

Op you are living there!!! Surely you want a life beyond this family whilst there?

Or you could ask for a second nanny, Italian to help whilst you learn.

Risk is - she speaks English Aswell and totally usurps you

Some where along the way there’s been substantial misunderstanding and miscommunication

And unfortunately the consequences are significant - you moving country, and then presumable spending a lot of money getting you over.

Short of you picking up the language very very swiftly - this isn’t going to work.

You need to leave. Now rather than later after high drama

And learn from this. To do proper extensive research before making life altering decisions

Just to be the siren voice of doom here ...

No matter how well the OP does, it won't be good enough. And in time that will become reason enough for problems getting paid.

If OP was my child, I'd be advising to run a couple of kilometres pronto. At the very best they have got themselves in with a family with very off preconceptions. At the very worst they have got in with a family who have lied and are clearly trying to cut corners with their own childrens education. Neither is a scenario that ends well.

Could you go round a space and pick objects that you name in English and them in Italian and make it a game, or even in books. They teach you, you teach them. They are only little and communication is so much more than words, actions and tone means more and that's the same in all languages, maybe ask the parents to pop out for a short time leaving you with the at least the older 2. Kids get upset at change but soon learn it's ok or more.

I had forgotten, but I had this as an au pair in Paris many years ago. I ended up learning phrases for nap time, going to the sand out etc. They wanted me to teach them English reading and writing too. (As well as the ironing in my room at night!) I did a few weeks, and then disappeared without warning, never to return.

I've been in this exact situation with a 3 year old who only spoke Russian - it's really hard. She did get used to me after a couple of days, and most of the time everything was fine, but if her mum was away or she got upset for some reason it was always really hard to calm her down, especially if I didn't know what she was upset about! And obviously she couldn't understand me if I was trying to tell her that her mum would be back soon, etc. It was really, really difficult and I don't know that it was that helpful in terms of language acquisition either - she just spoke to me in Russian and I spoke to her in English. I think it might have been easier with an older child so we could have done a bit of proper learning of words etc but she just wasn't interested, understandably. Mind you, this was just a summer job and not permanent so I daresay she might have picked up more English in time.

In your case, I think you've been put in a tricky position but I would definitely start learning Italian on the side and don't be afraid to use translate if you're really stuck. Do any of the other household staff speak English as well as Italian? Are the children likely to start doing any formal language lessons at any point?

Or that and a vague desire to ensure they don't meet a nice Italian person and end up neglecting the kids.

The OP hasn't said where in Italy they have ended up, which matters. It may come as a shock to some, but just like there's no "England", there most certainly isn't an "Italy". And Northern attitudes and culture can be very different to Southern attitudes and culture.

I would give notice and get another job. The parents are being unreasonable both to you and to their children. If they want English immersion, they should be paying for a tutor as well as a nanny. You can't do both, especially if the children are not on board with it.

The whole forbidden to learn Italian is ringing alarm bells for me. It just sounds dodgy.

They specifically said to not learn

I know they did. Because that keeps you cheap.

OK, being old you lose your looks. But if you've kept your ears and eyes open, you get experience in exchange.

If you’re going to be living in Italy you should learn Italian, it will make life easier for you and is basic good manners to at least attempt to speak the language of your host country. The parents get no say in that. What they probably mean is they don’t want you speaking Italian to the children, it doesn’t mean you can’t learn it.

I'd be wary of assumptions - especially in other cultures and countries. OP needs to make sure the parents didn't really mean they aren't to learn Italian.

Is there Netflix? You can choose language on most programmes. Also Rai Yoyo has an option for selecting original language on some children’s programmes. It’s a button on the remote to select I think.

Are you in a big city? There are council run courses of Italian for foreigners in most. I appreciate they won’t be open now but maybe in September will reopen.

But yes, the parents sound misguided

If you’re going to be living in Italy you should learn Italian, it will make life easier for you and is basic good manners to at leat attempt to speak the language of your host country. The parents get no say in that. What they probably mean is they don’t want you speaking Italian to the children, it doesn’t mean you can’t learn it.

For the children they are still very young and at an early stage with speech in general, so they will pick it up. Try singing songs and nursery rhymes, have Peppa pig on in English, play games on the floor with them in a really chilled manner.

I was briefly an au pair who managed to teach a few phrases to nonEnglish speaking children (although I spoke Italian most of the time) and now have bilingual DC, I used a lot of the same methods to reinforce English in the early years.

If it helps little ones can pick up language quickly.

The problem is the OP was hired as a nanny, not a language teacher. And now we have established that the parents are mad as a box of frogs, I'd scarper. (Or, to be Italian scarpa ). This really won't end well.

If it helps little ones can pick up language quickly. I taught in Korea for while and they weren't allowed to speak Korean in classroom. It was hard at first but they did learn. What books do they have in english? It might be good having something you can look at together, look up games and songs online.

I found it hard as a teacher in foreign country at first but did get easier.

I don’t think the parents have thought this through, they certainly seem to have unrealistic expectations. I think you’ve been given a poor description of the situation and it would be better for you and the children to end it sooner rather than later and get a better place.

I have a bilingual niece and nephew and even with one parent using English and the other Italian it took a long time for the children to learn.

They clearly have no idea either how the mind of a 3 yr old, plonked in front of someone who they don't know, and who is speaking a different language to them, works. And even less idea of how people learn a language.

Hope it all works out for you, but I can't see it myself.

Surely the parents can prevent you learning Italian or picking it up!!! That in bonkers. Surely in your own time, what you do it YOUR time?
Is there an Italian school anywhere nearby? You would find even a few hours a week there would improve your Italian and you might meet other English speakers. Duolingo has a place for sure, but I wish you could just pick the topic you want to learn about, rather than having to discuss 'the penguin is in the desert!' for example!