Au Pair Agencies...recommendations please...

For those of you who have used ap agencies, how long did it take to find your ap?

Contract and Handbook are essential but don't always solve everything. I had trouble getting my AP to honour the contract. She just said "yes, of course" to everything but in the end either pretended or genuinely didn't understand what she had agreed to do. I should have jumped on her right away-but I just felt relieved that I had got hold of an AP in time to save my job. In fact YOUR work as employer/manager only just begins then; really training and supervising their work carefully is essential and you are somehow supposed to do this while out at work yourself.

The signing of the contract was a lifesaver for me later-I gave it to a new one. Gave her time in private to read and sign it, she said she'd do it later and didn't, and meanwhile after a few hours observing her with dds I knew she had to go; she tried to get a month's pay out of me for one day's supervised work, but I just said she didn't sign it so I wasn't paying.

Thank you. Reading what you've all said, I'm being too soft!! I've had such moaners in among a couple of fantastic girls that I clearly need to get a grip of myself and stop tiptoeing around them. An hour or two a day?? Yes maybe a couple of times a week if I've been very lucky, otherwise the last one did about half an hour if that, quick hoover and mop of kitchen floor in the afternoon, then sloped off to her room to wait for the dcs to wake up an hour and a half later. This after having been at school ALL morning!! Phew, I need to sharpen my teeth for whoever we get next. Dammit, my dh has been saying this for the last 6 months or so, but I've been too much of a people-pleaser.

I think when you have school age kids, there are only so many hours that the aupair can be interacting with them. To do the agreed hours, they have to have an hour or two of housework. There isn't anything else for them to do. If they can't hack it, they are in the wrong job.

We say that they have to work 5 hours per day, and shouldn't be doing housework alone when the girls are at home.

This then breaks down to:

1 hour - getting girls ready for school and walking to and from school

3 hours - after school - picking up from school, taking to playground (WP), cooking their tea, checking homework and supervising them while they clean their own rooms.

That leaves one hour for housework - cleaning the kitchen and bathroom, and hoovering. The only bedrooms and laundry the aupair is responsible for are the girls and her own. The girls are meant to do most of the work, with appropriate chivvying along by the aupair.

I don't think that's too Draconian.

I know this is off the thread topic but I'd be really interested to know exactly what and how much housework you guys ask your aps to do. The housework thing so often seems to be a bone of contention and I never think we are asking them to do too much but I guess you never know till you compare with other people. Would you mind telling me, it might save me aggro in the future if i felt clearer about it in my mind!!

My first aupair came via an agency. It seemed good at first, in that they do all the admin, but we felt a bit bullied by being told what we wanted, rather than what we really wanted. The first aupair we had wasn't really suitable, and it took us five months for the penny to drop. Never again.

Now I use Aupair World. We've been fairly successful, I have to say. The worst was the one I had for the start of this academic year. She didn't really work out - didn't want to do housework, and her idea of the job was that she would look after the children and we would look after her. However, we were able to replace her (via Aupair World) within 2 weeks of giving notice, so that she left on the Friday evening and the new one arrived on the Sunday morning. The disruption has been minimal.

We've had about 10 au pairs and none have been absolute disasters (eg druggies), and apart from the one who broke her leg on a visit home, we haven't had to use emergency childcare.

I think maight be right Ingles! I don't think I'd anticipated how tough the whole agency/finding the right au aupair, plus the thought we might have to do it all again in a few months. I thinkmaybe it is better the devil you know!

First one had found another family, second was hopeless, really hopeless .

She didn't want to do housework. I asked about why wanted to be an au pair, said as her friend said you could earn lots money in london and there are more jobs. I asked if she had enjoyed her last job with children and she said erm it was okay. It is hard to gage what is a language/cultural thing though.

may as well see them.

My two are currently at the after school club majorstress and it is very good. It sjust that its started shutting half an hour earlier so it is just so stressy if train out of london is delayed or any other probs as have got no family nearby.

But just as we'd given up on au pairs and decided to stick with asc, the agency phoned to say got two applicants that want to do interviews tonight, so don't know what to do now!! Will see how they sound. Never simple is it?!

Well schools are supposed to do "wrap around" school care over the next few years, maybe they could cover several villages if they aren't too far apart.

But not much use in the short term for you.

I've had more success with afterschool club myself, have been using it for nearly 3 years and dd2 has just started there. They have never let me down on the day, unlike every other arrangement, staff are nice and thoroughly checked and trained NOT AT MY EXPENSE, dds have a snack, lots of fun activities or chilling if they'd rather, and other kids to play with, and dd1 has started getting some of her homework done there now too. I especially like that they get to meet kids from other schools, it's nice to see them around the town or at playgrounds. It's also very reasonable cost-wise, especially compared to the expense and aggro of the AP or nanny.

Ingles, I've registered with millenium. We've had lots of potentials but then not heard anything back.

Majorstress, no great aupair is still same, since I registered I have been inundated with emails, loads of which are completely unsuitable aupairs, or not even au pairs. Definitley far too time consuming to sift through them.

Am thinking of giving up on the au pair plan and trying with the after school club. May try Peterpan though cloudberry, they sound good. I got an email from Aupair-agency.com who sounded good and were cheaper than millenium but don't know if any good. The whole thing is meaning I'm getting no work done at all!

Peter Pan Au Pairs. I was recommended it this morning by a friend of a friend who has the most amazing ap. Having rung them first thing, I have already been sent details of 2 people who I am seriously considering. I did ring Millennium but for a Mother's Help and was gobsmacked by their fees! I had a very helpful conversation with Peter Pan and rather wish I'd known about them when we first started using aps as I might have had more success. Will let you know how we get on.

I used great au pair a few years ago, it didn't go well, but maybe it's better now.

I got way too many people contacting me, many with no right to be in this country, some lying about it, and the employer is very liable for that.

I wanted one who would take dds swimming and selected out all swimmers, and specified it over and over, contract and all, but in the end the girl refused after moving in (and she was useless in other ways too).

It's not an easy option, more of a hobby I'd say: you get a bigger pool of people, but more of them are utterly impractical or dreamers, or internet addicts who won't do any work, and it's not easy to screen those out.

Not really, have registered on their site but can't figure out whether its worth paying for membership and quite how it works.