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Original poster

What if my baby only sees one person all day?

29 replies

ssaahhdd · 06/07/2020 21:07

Hi,

I need to do some more research on this but I thought I'd reach out to the Mumsnet massive for their wise thoughts as a first port of call.

I'm currently on maternity leave and due to go back to work in September, when DD will be 9 months old. I'm currently looking for a childminder. Meanwhile, DH is employed but wants to give up his job to focus on his current self employment project (which is completely home-based and doesn't require full attention all day). It's a big step in general and we're not sure that he'll do it, ...but it's made more attractive by the thought of him being able to become a stay at home dad and us saving on childcare fees.

We've agreed to do a run-through where he takes a week off work and looks after her for the week and see how it goes. We've talked about how the typical day might go and he will make sure he spends enough time doing age appropriate 'educational' play activities with her, and try to get outdoors most days (though I don't even manage to do that myself now, so not essential I suppose).

My reservations are about her not being around other babies / children / adults. From my limited reading so far, it seems that young babies don't actually need to see other babies or children to develop their social skills - that their parents are enough. And of course on weekends we'll be seeing friends and family. But, while right now I take her out and about during the week while visiting friends with babies, or out to the shops or whatever... DH would not be doing any of that.

Does anybody know if this will affect her negatively in any way? Has anybody done similar and have experience of it?

BTW : we have said that no matter what, we will place her in a nursery from 2-or-3 years old (exact age TBD depending on my research ) - at an age when she will DEFINITELY need more education, fun, stimulation, outings, socialisation etc. So my question is regarding an under-2 year old, let's say.

Thanks in advance!

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bookmum08 · 07/07/2020 00:14

Baby groups like singing at the library are not generally for the grown ups - it's for the babies. He may be a 'homebody' but if he is commiting to being a sahd then he needs to do activities for the baby. Obviously at the moment these groups are not running but they are such a good thing to take babies too - especially free/cheap ones like library groups and stay and play. It's their first little introduction to the big wide world.

minipie · 07/07/2020 00:12

Hmm. A 6 month old (as you have now) is a very different proposition from a mobile baby and especially a toddler. Toddlers need watching all the time, demand your attention if you try to do anything, and will wreck the house if you stay in all day! Ok slight exaggeration but honestly I think your DH needs an accurate picture of what his day will be like - it won’t be fitting in educational play among work, it will be fitting in the odd 5 min snatch of work in between incessant toddler watching and toddler entertaining.

Original poster
ssaahhdd · 07/07/2020 00:04

Hah trust me he won't need/want to go out for himself - he's a proper homebody.

Thanks for the response :)

OP posts:
ArchbishopOfBanterbury · 06/07/2020 21:38

Why won't he go out and about with her? Parks, library, and toddler groups are a godsend when you're a stay-at-home parent to a toddler.

I don't think she will be "held back" at all by the lack of socialisation, but I know (from lockdown) that being at home with only a toddler for company is HARD!

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