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My au pair manhandled my dog.... is it gross misconduct?

211 replies

MissionImplausible · 21/02/2020 13:28

We have a camera in the house to keep an eye on the dog whilst we are at work. It's been off for a week or so but I put it back on today and it caught my au pair kicking our dog to get her out of her bed for a wee and then, when the dog didn't move, grabbing her by the collar to lift her clean off her feet and throwing her outside!!!

The au pair has been with us for over a year and knows about the camera but not that it was working again.

I am disgusted and want her out of my house straight away for what I see as gross misconduct - how can I trust her with my child (who is 10yrs old?) BUT a colleague who is playing devils advocate is suggesting a final warning is more appropriate as she has been with us for so long and we've not experienced this before (although perhaps it happens away from the doggy cam?)

Any opinions?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
AuntieCedent · 21/02/2020 14:28

Some of my colleague's have au pairs and honestly, it's just an excuse to have a cheap Nanny with poor boundaries and limited social power.

DartmoorDoughnut · 21/02/2020 14:28

Gone.

AuntieCedent · 21/02/2020 14:27

I wouldn't expect an au pair to be seeing to my dog unless I was paying them for childcare and dogsitting services. Are you?

SoloMummy · 21/02/2020 14:26

I don't think that you having a dog that she has had to assume responsibility for is fair on her and being a great nanny doesn't mean that you'd be a great dogs woman!

Given she's not employed to be a dog sitter, I think you need to be 110%sure that your contract will allow for this as reason for dismissal as she would be well within her rights to pursue this through small claims court.... Unless the camera can without doubt prove this was unreasonable force used..... Plenty of dog owners do as you have described op....

EyUpDuck12 · 21/02/2020 14:23

She would not spend another night in my home. I would also report to the agency you recruited her through and dependant on her age, report to police too.

MotherOfLittlePeople · 21/02/2020 14:23

Dismiss her and also show footage to police. I wouldn't want them looking after my children or animals especially when she knows there's a camera.

BritInUS1 · 21/02/2020 14:21

Get your husband to sack her and get her to pack now

SpencerReidsMistress · 21/02/2020 14:20

Get her out! How can anyone do that to a dog.

mumsiedarlingrevolta · 21/02/2020 14:20

I could never ever trust someone like this again.

She would have been sacked on the spot.

Some things are indefensible deal breakers and this is one for me.

DrinkFeckArseGirls · 21/02/2020 14:19

Bitch. It’s clearly must have been going on for a while if not the whole year.

IntermittentParps · 21/02/2020 14:19

She kicked your dog?

Zero tolerance. Get rid. No notice. Fuck the colleague.

AltheaVestr1t · 21/02/2020 14:18

Out, instantly. No hesitation.

MrsTerryPratchett · 21/02/2020 14:16

If she can mistreat a dog, she can mistreat a child.

A lack of empathy is a very worrying trait and not one I'd have around my family. Regardless of how I feel about my dog, people who mistreat animals are generally riskier people to be around.

BlessedBeTheFruitCake · 21/02/2020 14:16

Poor dog. Sacking her should be the least of her worries, evil woman.

Rootd · 21/02/2020 14:16

Dismiss her give the footage to the au pair agency and the rspca.

MashedPotatoBrainz · 21/02/2020 14:15

Dismiss her and hand the footage over to the police.

PhilomenaChristmasPie · 21/02/2020 14:14

Yes that's abuse of an animal.

Floribundance · 21/02/2020 14:14

Breaking the law on video has to be gross misconduct doesn’t it? I’d be reporting her to the RSPCA/police too.

Reginabambina · 21/02/2020 14:13

I’m not a dog person. I would 100% tell her to leave immediately. I would trust someone who got an animal not to hit a child (I know that lots of people are violent towards animals without ever escalating but it’s not a risk worth taking).

BreatheAndFocus · 21/02/2020 14:10

Evil b*tch! I’d get rid of her immediately, show the video to the police/RSPCA - and see if something could be written on her record.

What kind of psycho does that, and what else has she been doing that you don’t know about? Even if it was ‘only’ this, she’d never step foot in my house again!

Hugs to your DDog

corduroyal · 21/02/2020 14:07

I'd probably dismiss her as well, but if I was an au pair I'd envisage caring for kids, not dogs. She might resent looking after a dog. Doesn't make it ok to mistreat it. Is she from a culture where dogs are treated with less care?

Historydweeb · 21/02/2020 14:04

I hope your dog is ok x

heymammi · 21/02/2020 14:04

I would grab her by the collar and kick her out. Anybody that treats animals like that are not trustworthy in my book. At least you have seen her true colours now and you can do something about it.

Historydweeb · 21/02/2020 14:04

Police or rspca along with dismissal. I'd be tempted to kick her head in tbh. Very unladylike but people who abuse animals are pieces of shit in my eyes.

Cosmos45 · 21/02/2020 14:03

I would kick her out immediately. I would not tolerate anyone doing anything to hurt any of my pets. If it were me I would go home now and do it. I really think I would struggle not to give her a kick to help her out of the door as well..