Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

AIBU - how much does your au pair eat

130 replies

Ridgeview · 28/04/2019 06:53

I don't know if IABU but our au pair eats a lot. To the point that I have changed supermarkets to be able to keep costs down and it takes food away from the DCs.
For example, yesterday she had 3 southern fried chicken breast, half a packet of fresh spaghetti and 2 chocolate bars for supper.
She'll have scrambled eggs and toast for breakfast, pizza at lunch and then a large supper.
I have started to write a menu for what the DCs are having for supper so she doesn't eat it.
However, this doesn't make much of a difference.
Our previous au pairs never eat this much and I am finding it hard to keep up.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
Wallywobbles · 28/04/2019 07:40

I'd give her a budget and ask her to spend within it. Either she does her own shopping or you add to list. What nationality is she? I'd say part of the issue is not eating with the adults in the evening. I'd guess she's feeling isolated.

Stuckforthefourthtime · 28/04/2019 07:40

Three fried chicken breasts plus half a pack of spaghetti plus two chocolate bars in one sitting plus being slim and eating alone = eating disorder in my (fairly experienced) book.

I'd approach it with her carefully and supportively.

Fwiw we've had live in nannies before and to me, full board means sharing family meals at lunch and dinner, not being able to take any ingredients out of the fridge whenever. Snacks and breakfast should be totally her call.

choli · 28/04/2019 07:40

If you can't afford to feed an au pair just stop it rather than blame her.

HennyPennyHorror · 28/04/2019 07:39

It's a lot to me but I accept that my appetite is small. I don't think it's abnormal for a slim 20 year old.

The only thing you can do is to get one with a smaller appetite! Also OP...wait till' your DC are teens! Mine are slim and active and eat like men. They're young women! Their friends are the same too. Absolute gannets.

fullprice · 28/04/2019 07:38

Half a pack of spaghetti (I assume 250 grams), 3 chicken breasts is a lot of dinner. She had 3 BIG meals a day.
I’m surprised she is thin

speakout · 28/04/2019 07:38

Depends on the pizza.

My teens can eat a whole pizza each for lunch and still be hungry at dinner time- they are slim and active.

Leobynature · 28/04/2019 07:38

Hmm this is a hard one. Perhaps work out what the average persons weekly food bill is (I think it’s like £30/week) ask her for a shopping list and buy as much within the budget. Or give her the money for her weekly food shopping and she can do it herself. It might help her to budget and make the food last. When it runs out you could suggest she eat with the family (in which case your portion it) or she can top up her weekly shopping.

Original poster
Ridgeview · 28/04/2019 07:35

@greenpop21 - a whole pizza for lunch.

OP posts:
ChrisPrattsFace · 28/04/2019 07:35

In our house that would be normal. I don’t think you can really limit what they eat unless they are paid adequately to buy their own food.

Original poster
Ridgeview · 28/04/2019 07:35

She eats this on her own but she will also eat with the DCs in the evening and have whatever they have and will eat with them.
DP and I eat later.

OP posts:
Mooey89 · 28/04/2019 07:33

Could you give her a food allowance so she does her own shopping?
Make sure it’s reasonable so she doesn’t go without but hopefully it will make her a bit more aware.

greenpop21 · 28/04/2019 07:32

I also think it is rude of her take more food than is necessary unless she is buying it.

greenpop21 · 28/04/2019 07:31

More than 1 chicken breast is excessive as is 2 chocolate bars.
A whole pizza for lunch or a couple of slices?
If she’s thin she’s a lucky girl! I’d be fat eating that amount daily and stuffed.

MotherOfDragonite · 28/04/2019 07:30

This doesn't seem out of the normal range for a healthy teenager/20-something who may still be growing or doing plenty of exercise.

It doesn't sound as if she is getting many vegetables though.

How do you all eat? Separately, or together? Could she eat with the family rather than by herself? It might be a better solution for everyone.

CKWattisthemanager · 28/04/2019 07:29

The food you have listed is all at the cheaper end of things though OP.

speakout · 28/04/2019 07:28

If she is slim then she isn't eating too much.

icklekid · 28/04/2019 07:28

But even if you don't think it's normal you can't say to her to have less of an appetite unless you want her to be unhappy? You also can't give an adult a chocolate as a reward!!! She's thin so obvious what she is eating works for her so you've not got health reasons to bring it up with her...

Soontobe60 · 28/04/2019 07:26

Is it usually for au pairs to isolate themselves at meal times? She could be unhappy.
I'd also second doing a weekly meal plan, but with her. She might not like what you decide. I do know that when my DDs were that age they ate me out of house and home. Like human dustbins. They ate far more than me, but now we eat about the same.

Weenurse · 28/04/2019 07:24

Is she an athlete in her spare time, because that is a large meal by my standards.
1 chicken breast is enough protein, 1 cup pasta is enough carbs, bucket load of veggies as that is what they fill up on.
Chocolate as a reward.

SunshineSpring · 28/04/2019 07:23

I could eat most of that in a day - except 3 chicken breasts. Just one of those, and I'd try pretty hard not to eat 2 choc bars (it doesnt always happen!).

Yesterday, I had pancakes with lemon, sugar and raspberries for breakfast, pizza for lunch, followed by Birthday cake, and then beef&Veg noodles for tea. Not my most healthy day - could have done with more (fruit and) veg. But doesn't sound that dissimilar to your Au Pair?? Half a pack of fresh pasta is easy!

Original poster
Ridgeview · 28/04/2019 07:17

@Soontobe60 - she is thin and eats alone. She cooks and takes it up to her room.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ridgeview · 28/04/2019 07:16

@CaptainMarvelDanvers I mean dinner

@MaybeitsMaybelline - 3 full size chicken breasts

OP posts:
UCOinanOCG · 28/04/2019 07:14

Sounds like a normal 20yo with a healthy appetite.

MaybeitsMaybelline · 28/04/2019 07:12

Well fresh spaghetti does cook down a lot and are talking three full breasts or three of those mini fillets? Two chocolate bars? Easy!

CaptainMarvelDanvers · 28/04/2019 07:11

Wait a minute, when you say supper do you mean dinner?

If so then that changes it a bit.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.

Join Mumsnet Log In

This thread is closed and is no longer accepting replies. Click here to start a new thread.