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Original poster

AIBU - is this too much to ask of an au pair?

31 replies

bigfatpants · 25/04/2019 18:02

First question - is it acceptable for an au pair to have a single room rather than a double?

Secondly, au pair duties would be to be present after school and to help with homework. Child is aged 12. The only issue is that my child has huge school anxiety so there will be occasions where my child will be at home for the whole day and will need the au pair to be there too. This is often once per week but is at short notice. I would propose to pay the au pair extra on those days. Is this unreasonable?

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Original poster
bigfatpants · 25/04/2019 19:37

Just coming back... I don't want to be -that guy- but even with one full day supervising child per week, this is only a total of 25.5 hours per week that I'd be looking for.

Duties would be restricted to: making sure teeth brushed in morning, reminding child re PE kit, unloading dishwasher once in the morning, and help with homework. So 15 hours per week over 4 days.

Then one full day ad hoc day at home where no duties would be required other than being physically present as an adult in the house.

Is this still too much?

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Original poster
bigfatpants · 25/04/2019 19:25

Child is having therapy for anxiety which is pretty much based around school, and being home alone for any period of time when it's dark (eg from 4pm in winter months).

We don't need a full time nanny but struggling to find childcare that can bridge this very ad hoc gap of random days being missed from school. Thought an au pair might fit the bill as on four days out of five the duties would be minimal. Back to the drawing board 😩

OP posts:
UCOinanOCG · 25/04/2019 18:45

I wouldn't expect an au pair to have to manage a 12yo school refuser who has anxiety issues. I think that is far too much responsibility.

Holidayshopping · 25/04/2019 18:41

I think a partial school refuser is probably too much for an au pair to handle, tbh.

mamaoffourdc · 25/04/2019 18:39

I think employing a councillor/therapist to help your child to get to school each day would be better

Littlefish · 25/04/2019 18:13

What if the au pair has signed up to do a language course on that day? Would you expect them to miss it in order to stay at home?

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