What am I doing wrong... or do we just have too many kids?

I've worked in recruitment/HR for years . Agencies of any kind can be set up in days 🤣🤣🤣

Right. But she's had two good aupairs from them. I was highlighting the difference.

I worked with/for educational agencies for years myself. Most of them are pretty thorough and depend on their reputation. No 'crying with laughter emoji' here.

And they had an apartment separate from the house so when they were off they were really off. Sole use of a car. We have 4 kids and we had an au pair couple. All kids 7+.

In France we've had au pairs. Legal rules apply here. 20 hours a week max. No under 2s in sole care. And paid French lessons (if I remember correctly it was 12 hours a week). The rest of the rules are what you'd expect.

All in all including taxes it cost about 11k a year.

We didn't pay travel to/from country. Is that an obligation? Cos it's a huge extra if not.

also since you dropped nursery hours you have some money to spend on the au pair
why are you trying to save it instead of paying it?

As PPs have said, the terms & conditions you are offering an au pair just aren’t competitive.

apologies if I've missed it but how old are your DC?

I think 4 kids, especially if there are younger ones in the mix, is a lot for someone probably only just out of their teens, if not still a teenager, to take on.

APW is like an advertising board. To my knowledge, they don't purport to be an agency and don't undertake reference checks of any description on either APs or host families, so caution is advised.

@DropOffArtiste I apologise then. The one I was talking about was an international web based aupair agency of the same name with subsidiaries in lots of countries

Also

"I think the £600 on an agency went on more than a read of an application form and a phone call. Presumably the agency spent years formulating the application form and interview questions, building up a reputation that made the au pairs feel they were signing up for something safe, respectable and legit. They do a screening process so they don't get casual applicants with no intention of doing the job. And they presumably advertise somewhere more effective than APW.

Pay the money."

I've worked in recruitment/HR for years . Agencies of any kind can be set up in days 🤣🤣🤣

Aupair world is not an aupair agency.

I can't give full detail for obvious reason but with my history of work as a police detective in child protection, in relation to one of the biggest investigations I ever worked on, I wouldn't use aupair world if they were the only aupair agency on the planet.

If you both work from home a lot, couldn’t you get involved in getting the kids up in the morning / to school and then getting them to bed at night? It’s a lot of work as it currently stands? I feel exhausted just thinking about it with 4 kids. I have two DDs within your age group. If I had to add another two in the mix, I would definitely struggle.

I am in London and found that when I hired last year, £80/85/week wasn't enough. We offered £100 for 2 kids & 25 hours.

I think 4 children might be putting the au pairs off. Can you afford to increase the money?

There are definitely less and less au pairs looking as we get closer to Brexit which doesn't help.

I know you think 4 kids is not as much work but those hours must be very very busy when she has them all. Rather than one eating tea and one playing, you have one eating tea, one playing, one wanting their bottom wiped and one wanting help in the shower. Rotate so the eating tea one wants help in the shower etc. etc. and you never get a second to sit down.
I only have two but one has ADHD and never lets up for a minute and I wouldn't wish him on an au pair TBF.

4 kids is ALOT for a young person to deal with for 30hrs a week imo.

I hate the ideas of Au Pairs, I get that they're not fully qualified childcare professionals but to be paid just £100 allowance a week (all right, I know room and board is included) for that amount of responsibility makes me think of slave labour tbh.

Twenty odd years ago I was a nanny/mothers help. I had my own flat, bills paid, use of car. I looked after two children for 7 hours a day plus an evening of babysitting. My tasks were similar to those you are expecting of the au pair. I was paid £100 a week THEN, plus my employer paid my tax and NI.

I think you need a Nanny and to pay accordingly.

The problem is you're competing with lots of families who have fewer kids (and all of whom are school age).

All of the local families I know in London who have an au pair have fewer kids, all kids are school age and they pay more than £100.

Even then they haven't found it particularly easy to find a good au pair and they've varied.

It's really not comparable to hiring a nanny because of the room, board etc -
It’s exactly like a live in nanny.
Reduce the hours to 25, no “ getting on with other stuff” , up money to £150 and add in a giffgaff sim.
You expecting to much and minimising the amount of work with four children.

I think the £600 on an agency went on more than a read of an application form and a phone call. Presumably the agency spent years formulating the application form and interview questions, building up a reputation that made the au pairs feel they were signing up for something safe, respectable and legit. They do a screening process so they don't get casual applicants with no intention of doing the job. And they presumably advertise somewhere more effective than APW.

Pay the money.

after the au pair* has done...

Au pairs get rent, food and all bills paid by host family. The £100 is put spending money on top of that. It’s a pretty good deal for a hound person on their year abroad

Except in OP's case it isn't because after the OP has done FT childcare, housework, school pickups, dinner, homework, bath + bed the au pair will not have the energy to use the £15 'bonus' travel card to go anywhere as she will be so exhausted. It really doesn't matter how nice the bedroom is.

I think it’s the hours and number of children. Your job will look harder than most others advertised.

I do t think it’s a pay issue. We pay £110 in London plus room, bills food and board for 25 hours looking after three kids and a dog. That seems pretty standard around here and given local rents it’s a package worth over £800 a month.

I'm in London and pay 130 pw for one school aged child, who is pretty self-sufficient. Officially 25 hours but in practice less as he walks to/from school alone.

AP World guidance on salary is very out of date.

Also you said you'd want them to get on with non childcare related things .

That's not what an au pair is really for .

For all of my roles the families needed me to have the children 10-4 M-F , cook their meals and put the kids laundry on .

You are there as a big sister not a housekeeper/Nanny

I have been an au pair in my younger years .

I got my role via Au Pair world .

It's the number of kids sorry .

More work for the same money as people who have 1-2 children .

Also Brexit .