DS is 4.5 months old and will be starting at a childminder's in the next few weeks, first for 20 hours a week (while I am in training) and then full time when I start a new job in April. Unfortunately we didn't actually choose the childminder - she was the only one in the area with a place and the hours we needed. (I do know there are fantastic CMs out there and given the choice, we might not have chosen her.)
She is older with 4 grown children and always came across as a bit old-school. However, during our last meeting (after we signed the contract), she talked about a baby she used to leave alone behind a closed door for hours because she would not stop crying and "there was nothing she could do". She also mentioned occasionally leaving children with her son or daughter-in-law (who live in the same building) while she ran errands. As far as I know these people have not been vetted. This is only information she volunteered, so I can only imagine what she is not telling us.
We recently relocated due to my husband's job and have no family or friends nearby. We looked into other options (other CMs, nanny, nursery) but none of these were feasible for various reasons. I can't bear imagining DS being left alone in a room crying and I am very worried about an accident happening, but I feel my hands are tied. What can I do? I have thought of showing up unexpectedly to pick up DS to ensure everything looks ok but sadly this is likely not feasible with our jobs. Even if I were to report her - so what? We will still need childcare. Do you have any advice?