Ok so I know some children are slow eaters, but............

Ds1 is VERY picky and used to be horrifically slow - I well remember him taking 2 and a half hours to eat 2 spoonfuls of Shreddies...

He IS improving (nearly 6 now), particularly in speed but he's never going to be a gobbler. Unlike his sister!

YIPPEE

I learnt with slow picky mindee that the best thing was to put a tiny bit on her plate and then she would feel like she'd achieved a lot more as wouldn't be leaving loads. I also only eat small portions and find that even when I'm really really hungry, if a big plate full of food is given to me, it's so overwhelming I go off wanting it.

Anyway, well done again

I'd put a picnic style platter in front of her (several different foods) & make myself busy for half an hour (clean a cupboard/ prepare dinner for you & dh)...It may take your mind off it & with less attention/pressure she may decide to try things?

DS used to be very slow & fussy.

I often gave him Apple Wedges in place of vegetables as he has always loved sliced up apple, and got into the habit of a side of veggies. He also grew to like raw carrot (and then cooked).

He liked plain pasta, with a touch of butter. We then added grated cheese (which became a favourite on its own) then small amounts of meat sauce covered in grated cheese until the balance was restored.

He still won't eat mash or boiled spuds, but loves roasties & will eat garlic potato wedges. Chips are not liked (except McDonalds!)

I kept trying new veggies, and discovered he likes baby asparagus!

At 8 he was still fussy, now at 11 he is much easier - just pulls faces but does try at least!

Keep Going

Hey Star1976, don't worry, if she lives on peanut butter sandwiches don't worry, she'll soon tire of them!

My mum made me eat Beef Strogonoff when I was her age, I took about 2 hours!! Funnily enough its one of my favourites now.

I have the same with my 5 (and sometimes my 13 yr old!) with food. Luke is quite good, he'll have a go at things and I'll let him leave it if he really doesn't like it, if I make a curry I usually make him something else as he's not keen on spicy food except the poppadums! He loves boiled egg and strips of bread so i usually make that. He also enjoys bread and chicken sandwiches, especially at breakfast! He can be slow sometimes but he's fast at school, probably to go out playing!

but it's not your problem. leave her with the cold chips and cold pasta. you hurrying her along isn't going to help her realise it's nicer warm. just leave her to it. she'll fill up at breakfast the next day. best of luck!

i think the timer will put too much pressure on her. what is the actual problem with her eating very slowly? yes it is annoying, but apart from that?

can you offer the meal in the centre of the table for people to choose their amounts and let her take what she wants and leave her to it? if she's happy to sit there for 2 hours then so be it. so what? if she gets up and eats nothing then so what? she gets a poorly tummy, wakes up hungry and maybe eats some breakfast?

or go with the peanut butter every meal option. the see what happens. she likes it, she may go off it.

let her see that life goes on while she's mucking about with her food.

I'd try offering her more variety on her sandwiches, egg mayo/cheese/ham & smoothies are a gret way to hide fruits plus you can also add yoghurt/seeds & nuts.

Will she eat soup?...Soup & bread for dipping is very popular with a lot of children.

I can understand you being worried, Star but as long as your DD is growing normally, I can't see what you would gain by making mealtimes a huge battle.

My DD was really picky till she started kindergarten, then all of a sudden she started asking for green beens for tea. Complete change because until then she hadn't touched veg at all. The kindergarten has a policy, that we have adopted at home, she is not allowed to say "don't like it" unless she tries it.

It is important not to let it escalate into a powergame between her and you. Take the pressure off a bit, I bet you sit with your teeth clenched and one eye on her plate at all times. Try to relax and sneak something healthy in every so often, maybe she will surprise you.

Peanut butter sandwiches are fine....with a drink of milk/fruit juice and a piece of fruit.If you can make it with wholemeal bread then excellent then well and good...give her that x 3 times a day until she asks for something else,( unlike adults childre tend to like eating the same thing...), and then say ' what would you like ?'
Above all else stop worrying...and believe she WILL be fine.....Enjoy making nice meals for yourself and anyone else who wants to join in....soon she will be one of them

star, I have to say I agree with others on here. serve up a meal. if she refuses to eat it then she goes without.
If that then means she feels ill in the morning then that's her own fault. She is old enough to understand actions and consequences. (ie, if you don't eat you'll feel ill)
If she chooses to do that then so be it.
Offer her a healthy breakfast and so start the day.

Don't get me wrong, I am not a force-feeding type of person. I could not stand peas as a child, and as a result I would never force ds to eat something that he had tried and disliked. But if I serve something up that I know he eats then it's that or nothing.

I wasnt being fascetious!!

I was sticking up for you actually!!

What I was trying to say was that by not giving her a peanut butter sandwich you were not giving in to her and trying to give her a 'proper' meal in the hope that in the future she would eat something like fishfingers (which is not a junk food) or chicken or lamb or beef!

I am trying to do this with ds2 who is 2.6yrs. By giving him chicken nuggets I was hoping he would move on to chicken or lamb. He will now try and fishfinger but it is gradual.

dont be so huffy!

8years old that is being bit picky, too picky at her age. I ave a 2 year old who I look after and wen I started she apparently was picky with her food and wud eat only a small bowl, mean really small amounts. I started doing a stciker chart 8year old mb too big for that, but that has worked quite well. She still bit slow,i have started counting numbers as she tends to worm her way out of things lol.Giving her too much of what n only she likes thats all she will live on, cuz she knows u will give it to her, she dnt make a fuss. If i had a child where this happened, well it's eat it or get nothing.harsh i know but they gotta learn, or id wanna least them see try. I wud start not giving her evrything she ;likes tho. I dunno everyone has differ opinions on these sort of things

I really sympathise star, my ds (aged 2)is also a fussy eater and would also eat anything put in front of him (til 18months), he then entered the toddler eating stage and also has a small list of things he will eat (mostly things he can feed himself). I too have dubiously tried starving him into admission I too had the same result. A very hungry, upset, stomach pained toddler.

Within reason I leave a plate of food ds has eaten out til he eats it. Luckily he will eat a good mix of fruit and dairy, wholemeal/grain bread, some meat, some veg hidden but it is damn hard and please don't feel bad. I too would give her a timer, no pressure I think, and less stress for you. I feel I should share that my sister's dd has always been a picky eater with the appetite of a sparrow, and had a smaller list than your dd, health visitor with plenty of experience told my sister not to worry, give her food you are both happy with her eating and try not let it be a battle. She is much better now than she used to be, so there is hope. hth
Kay

Franny I think the OP probably thinks she could start her dd on turkey dinos and chips in the hope that she might turn to chicken and fishfingers in the future.

If she only eats peanut butter sandwiches she wont get used to eating a more challenging meal with meat and veg.

I gave each of my own children a day of the week each to choose the dinner. (gave them days that I didn't have to cook for mindies so it didn't matter if the dish they chose wasn't entirely suitable). They had to do all the work - writing the shopping list, coming with me to make sure I bought everything they needed and cook it themselves (with supervision!).

Both have their own favourites and choose the same each week but it seems to have helped. I guess they felt it was fairer to make an effort to eat other peoples choice of meal when everyone else has eaten their choice.

She is 8 . Missed that the first time I read the OP.

If my DD acts like this when she is 8, I'm sending her to military school.

Can you try introducing some veggies at lunch time? Salad veggies are possibly less "threatening" than cooked dinner veg.

My ds loves slices of cucumber, wedges of tomato, pieces of pepper, a spoonful of sweetcorn, etc. He even loves olives, which I thought would be too much for a 3 year old. He does eat VERRRRY slowly though.

With your DD being that much older, you have probably got into a set pattern of eating, and she has become comfortable only with what she likes the most.

I think you need to be strong and start serving up more balanced meals. Don't offer any snacks between meals for a little while and see how you get on. Don't pressurise or get angry, just serve it up and leave her to it. A bit of encouragement may help. Or get her to help you prepare the food. Or make funny faces out of mashed potato by adding a few peas or carrots or something.

A balanced meal should be half a plate of vegetables, then for the other half a plate, two thirds of it should be carbs (pasta, rice, potatoes, cous cous, etc), and the final third of that half should be protein (meat, fish, cheese, tofu, etc).

I think you are the key to this, and at the moment she can really only eat what you serve up. If you let this continue, when she's older she'll be going to the chip shop after school and refusing your meals completely. If you can get her into good eating habits now, then I think you can avoid that later.

(Sorry if my views upset - I am a bit fanatical about this though - dh calls me the food police!)

Peanut butter sandwich sounds better to me than turkey thing and chips.