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Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Oh bother - how much notice do you give to kids' feelings about childcare?

33 replies

Bluebear · 14/01/2007 19:42

We are trying to find a not-too-expensive alternative to our imperfect nanny. I finally find a childminder that not only does the pick ups from the right school but also has 2 vacancies which will just about do for my children.
We've emailed, spoken, seen the draft contracts, visted, seen lots of impressive pictures and timetables and certificates and we are sure that she would provide better childcare than nanny...but....she has a young daughter who spent the time of our visit by saying 'big sticky poo, wee, bot' at regular intervals (not because she needed the toilet, just out of fun, as you do)...and ds has taken great offence to it.
So, do I rail road him into accepting this childminder (and her 'rude' daughter, or do I hang on with current nanny in the knowledge that in 5 years of keeping an eye open this is the only local CM who comes close to having the right vacancies.
I've tried suggesting to him that he has a 'trial' day (it's only before and after school really) but he is adamant he doesn't want to see the girl again.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Katymac · 14/01/2007 19:57

Yes at 3 that is very common and at 5 he will be embarrassed

Just say well you're older so you don't say things like that

I few stories about when he was that age might help

I'd suggest a second visit as well

Bluebear · 14/01/2007 19:55

Hi Katymac, tried the 'she's only a baby thing' to which his response was 'she's older than dd and dd wouldn't say those things' and I'm worried about the 'maybe you could teach her to be polite' because i spend a lot of my time telling him he is not 'in charge' of dd and that only dh and I can tell her off.
At the moment my thoughts are to give it a day or two and then suggest a repeat visit to him.

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KaySamuels · 14/01/2007 19:55

x posts there me thinks!

KaySamuels · 14/01/2007 19:55

How old was the cms daughter and how old is your son? I guess what i'm asking is was this behaviour age appropriate or was it rudeness when a child should know better?

Their ages do make a big difference, also was the cm squirming with embarassment? She may have been as horrified as your son was! I would have another visit before you make up your mind.

Bluebear · 14/01/2007 19:53

But don't all 3 year olds go through a 'poo bum wee' stage, and isn't the most effective thing to do to ignore them (which CM was doing? ) - I wouldn't say that mine had better manners, just that ds is 5 (old enough to know not to do it) and the girl was younger.

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Katymac · 14/01/2007 19:52

How old was the daughter?
How old is your DS?

Can you go down the well of course she's only a baby so don't take any notice or your manners are so nice maybe they will rub off on her or you can teach her to be polite?

yearoftheox · 14/01/2007 19:49

I can understand his feelings! However, perhaps he'll go again with you and see how it is. I know with my own that they can play up on these occasions.

cazboldy · 14/01/2007 19:46

guess it depends if you feel his feelings are a valid response to her behaviour, and also whether you would want some one who obviously doesn't have the same "manners" as your family looking after your children.