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Original poster

Childminder using car

82 replies

Marghitx · 29/03/2016 11:40

I’d like some advice on the following situation as it was not the best return to work this morning! Sorry in advance for the long post :)
We are very happy with our child-minder and most importantly, our daughter is. From the start she gave us a choice if we were happy for her to use her car to go around with the kids (3 in total) but we never felt comfortable so we never allowed it. This has never been a problem for 1 year. Today all of a sudden she’s giving us the choice: either we allow her to use her car when and how she wants, or she’s giving us the standard 1 month notice and she won’t work for us anymore. I’m a bit upset because this sounds a lot like blackmail to me .. She also said she’s not entitled to tell us beforehand she’s taking the car (but I’d like to know where my daughter is during the day!). We are not entirely comfortable of giving the authorisation and we feel like we’ve been forced in a situation we’re not happy about. We tried to comprise, asking the grandparents to take over when she needs to use the car. In this way we felt we won’t restrict the other children either. We spoke about it with her but she won’t budge. Am I being too unreasonable? To me it sounds like she wants the car to go around, meeting with other childminders, probably run some errands. I don’t really see the point in having the car as there are several children’s groups were we live, two big parks, so the children are perfectly happy walking everywhere.
Thanks ..

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Burgerbobismydad · 29/03/2016 11:53

Yabu. She runs her business as she sees fit. It isn't "blackmail". If she changes the service she offers, you are free to use this service or give your required notice and find another childminder who offers precisely the service you want (if any one does). You don't employ her so you can't dictate how she does her job. You can only pay for her services, or find another childminder.

PotteringAlong · 29/03/2016 11:52

Has anyone other than you ever driven her? Why do you trust her to look after your DD but not behind the wheel of a car?

bloodyteenagers · 29/03/2016 11:49

She might want to take the children to activities not in the area. Other parents might have mentioned they never go to the beach, zoo, museum whatever and would like this to start happening.
She might have been asked to start collecting/dropping off on of the children.
She might be bored of going to the same places and knows of better outside the area.
She might want to run errands, like normal family life and is restricted and would like her weekends back.

LemonBreeland · 29/03/2016 11:49

YABU. It is her business to run the way she wishes and she has now decided that your lack of allowing her to use the car is restrictive.

What is the reason you don't want her to? I can't understand why it would be an issue for you.

HSMMaCM · 29/03/2016 11:48

You'd be very lucky to find a cm who doesn't use their car. There are a few. It seems that she didn't need her car initially and was happy to say she wouldn't drive with your do, but now the needs of her business have changed.

I don't let parents know every time we get in the car. We could never do anything spontaneous. We've been to museums, cafes, zoos, the beach (I did plan that one in advance), different toddler groups, forest walks and many other places we wouldn't have been able to access without the car.

You can ask to check her insurance and have a look at the car seats if it would make you feel better.

Unfortunately if you really want a non driver, you may need to go somewhere else, but that sounds a shame when you already have a good relationship with her.

dementedpixie · 29/03/2016 11:46

It's so much easier and faster getting places if you have a car. What is your issue with it? As long as she uses the appropriate child restraint then I don't know why you wouldn't want her to use it

SKYTVADDICT · 29/03/2016 11:45

Yabu I am afraid. She is self employed and can run her business as she pleases. Why don't you want your daughter in her car? I think you will be hard pushed to find a childminder that never uses a car although there may be a few about

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