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Original poster

How do i approach a parent and tell them i suspect.........

60 replies

Kidstrak · 11/12/2006 22:57

That their baby has an allergy to cats?!!!, the baby is 14m i have had him for 6m, when the baby came to me i was told of the excema that covered the skin mostly in the joints, i was told not to use cream on him as they done this at home, (although the creams are in his bag and say 3times daily and he is with me for 8hrs at a time) he scratches his body all the time and i have offered to put the cream on him, but parents say not to bother even though it weeps under his legs. He always is sleepy during the day as he doesn't sleep well during the night, up several times.

Anyway over last few months he has a constanly runny nose and a rattling chest like asthma some days more wheezing than others, but parents say he hasn't got asthma just a cold, but this so called cold has lasted far too long for my liking, poor little thing scratches his eyes also when they water.

Last week i noticed wart like spots on his bottom and said to his parents when they picked him up, they took him to the doctors who said it was a virus he had, and it would prob go away on its own, However earlier this evening i googled his syptoms and pet allergy came up, Cats! They have 2 cats! and the site also states about wart like spots which are a type of Herpes that happens when bacteria get into the excema!

Am i jumping the gun or does this little one have an allergy!!!!!

OP posts:
handlemecarefully · 12/12/2006 14:28

Sorry has the thread moved on ? (only got time to skim read) - has there been a definite conclusion that it is not allergy to cats then?

foxinsocks · 12/12/2006 14:26

eumovate still has a steroid element I think (?) - hopefully she is using it under her doctor's suggestion.

I'm NOT SAYING SHE IS LIKE THIS but I have known some people who take their children to the doctor for eczema and then come out with the steroid creams and then don't use them citing the 'I don't want to use steroids on my children' line (and I can understand the sentiment there). I think you need to be prepared for this line (esp if the creams don't look like they are being used).

And hydrocortisone cream (check the % but it's normally 1%) is really not that strong in the greater scheme of eczema creams and can make an enormous difference once it is on. Obviously you don't want to slather it on but a tiny bit can really help.

I think you need to have a heart to heart with her. Surely any mother would not want to see their child suffer this way?

handlemecarefully · 12/12/2006 14:25

Sorry haven't read all thread.

With my cat allergy it's runny nose, itchy eyes and generally feeling dreadful, plus awful itching.

In my case the symptoms do not resolve immediately that I leave the house - they take an hour or so to resolve.

This baby may well show allergic symtoms after leaving the parental house because he is exposed the feline feckers every day, plus he may have a cat hair or two on his clothing.

I would broach the subject directly with the parents - "Are you sure he is not allergic to something..." - skin prick tests are not difficult to access. If GPs don't do them they can refer fairly quickly to a Dermatology appointment

FairyTaleOfNewYork · 12/12/2006 14:24

when dd1 was little (under a year), when her ski nwas bad head to toe eczema, we would go through a tube in just over a week. we go through a tube of aveeno every 5 days here for dd1, dd2+3 use about half a tube every 5 days as theyarent as bad.

Original poster
Kidstrak · 12/12/2006 14:19

just thought of another thing when i post the names of the creams tommorow i will check the dates on them to see when they were issued as they are still pretty well rounded tubes with not much out of them, i know you don't use a lot of these creams when treating the skin but he has it quite a bit and my tubes were always flat or squashed after using them a good several times with ds

OP posts:
Original poster
Kidstrak · 12/12/2006 14:14

foxinsocks there is emuvate in his bag but no prescription sticker so i think mum has bought this over the counter, all the creams are in the front of his bag as she keeps them there when at home so she has them altogther for when she is out and about with the lo, i have searched on the net again and the syptoms linked still say CATS anyway not that that matters that much now anyway, what matters is for his skin to be treated

OP posts:
Original poster
Kidstrak · 12/12/2006 14:08

misdee i know i feel like banging my head myself, pennies we need permission for anything and it has to be a signed form(which i have loads of medical forms short term/long term and as and when needed), we no longer can except a verbal permission, also any new medicines or unopened have to be given first by the parent before coming to me

OP posts:
foxinsocks · 12/12/2006 14:08

We get eumovate over the counter (it helps stop the itching) but I'm not sure you are supposed to use it on young children without a script (i.e. in your shoes iyswim).

Why does she even send the creams in to you if she doesn't want to use them, that's what I don't get.

I think she's being really obtuse. They shouldn't scratch all the time and if that's what she thinks, she's got it wrong. I think you have to put your foot down here - he is suffering from a medical condition and you are not being allowed to treat him.

LoveMyGirls · 12/12/2006 14:04

its very difficult i would not be happy if the parents were stopping me from taking (as i see it) proper care of thier lo.

i guess at the end of the day you have to accept he's their child and what they say goes or put your foot down and risk losing him altogether.

Original poster
Kidstrak · 12/12/2006 14:03

deckthehills it does fall into a bottom category of neglect but as i say at the very bottom, when i done a training of child protection its classed as a failure to something or other i forget all the wording to be exact, i do have notes somewhere, but if its what the parents want i have to go along with them or i refuse to look after him, of course i don't want to have to come to that stage, i think i would have to say something like i'm unable to care for him any longer rather than "i refuse to care for your son as you won't let me put cream on him" or for that matter accuse them of not putting cream on, on a regular basis! God my head is spinning, i suppose i do care too much sometimes where kids are concerned but it doesn't affect my work but also as it christmas time i'm busy trying to get everything organised and i have this hanging over me!

OP posts:
Pennies · 12/12/2006 14:00

Do you need the medical form to sign for non medical creams? My LO's excema reacted well to Aveeno which you can buy over the counter (tho it is expensive) if she's worried about you putting on too much of a medical cream.

Have you asked her why exactly does she not want him having cream?

Poor kid sounds like he's in a right state. Feel sorry for him.

FairyTaleOfNewYork · 12/12/2006 13:54

can i bang my head against the wall here for you!

the baby needs creaming as and when, an 8 hour gap without cream and him scratching will lead to more infections. you need to put your foot down. horrible i know.

Original poster
Kidstrak · 12/12/2006 13:53

ok, mentioned the creams this morning to mum as she was talking about his bottom clearing of the warts,(some have scabbed over and fallen off) i explained that i thought this was due to his excema being infected as i had googled it, she was fine with this even when i mentioned the herpes virus, she said thats what she thought the docotr and said its type2 or something (so why didn't she tell me this) but she said doctor never said it was linked to the excema, i have said i would like her to take him back to doctor to have it looked at properly as i have other little ones who might catch the herpes virus and end up with cold sores etc.

Sorry this is so long)
I then produced the medical forms that i showed mum when lo started with me and i said if you would like to sign it and tell me the types of the creams i would apply as and when needed, she said NO don't bother we do it at home, i played dumb and said the lo scratches quite a bit during the day and i didn't know which one to use, she said it doesn't matter as he always scratches. I have spoken to another childminder today and she has said i must put my foot down and tell mum that her lo needs creamed when he is with me. But how the hell do i do that without her thinking i'm a total b**ch!

I don't have the lo here at the moment but tommorow i am going to post the types/names of the creams so that someone can enlighten me to its uses, i do have permission to use suodocream on his bottom but this is no use on excema

OP posts:
dmo · 12/12/2006 09:46

sounds like one of my mindees
found out she has a allergie to eggs

SantaGotStuckUpTheGreensleeve · 12/12/2006 00:18

I agree with HC, that's a good tactful way of getting the point across without offending. No wonder you don't want to just leave it, poor little mite

I do feel it encumbent upon me to point out, however, that the lihelihood of the Mary of Christian legend ever having possessed a harpsichord (yeah, lord) is very very slim.

deckthehillswithboughsofmummy · 12/12/2006 00:17

Sorry that should of read neglect had a glass of wine after finishing work and it has gone straight to my head

deckthehillswithboughsofmummy · 12/12/2006 00:16

Are you worrying that this may be neglest on the parents part and that you may have to report it? It sounds as if you really care for this little one and I hope you manage to find a resolution.

mummypig · 12/12/2006 00:13

In my experience eczema is often linked to allergies, or food sensitivities. So it might not be cats, but it could be. Or it might be something else he is sensitive to. I would also worry if his eczema is that bad and the parents are not putting on the right creams.

I hope the mum explains their position to you - maybe you could prepare some permission forms for her to sign and then she would have to explain exactly which ones she expects you to use, and how frequently. If she's not clear enough you could perhaps call NHS Direct to check usage of all the creams.

sandcastlesforanaussiexmas · 11/12/2006 23:58

but surely if he lives with cats then the hairs could be on his clothes & causing the symptoms at your house, or if he has a toy with him from home, that too can cause a problem.

FairyTaleOfNewYork · 11/12/2006 23:56

in my nappy bag is a tube of aveeno, 2 bluie in ahler,s one brown, tube of hydrocortisone, and a bottle of piriton. ther aveeno is used as and when and i wouldnt have a prblem with a CM applying it all day(all dd's). the hydrocortisone s for flare ups, (dd1 allergic to cats amongst other things but for all dd's) piriton again for cat allergy or any rogue hives that appear(dd1,2+3). asthma pumps for dd1.

eczema is easily infected especially if the poor wee one is scratching a lot. if the creams are put in the bag, thn why isnt she signing to say you can use them? its utter madness IMO.

Original poster
Kidstrak · 11/12/2006 23:52

i don't quite get it myself either, i think maybe at times its not put on regular (that bits obvious during the day as he is with me) but i have heard mum mention about stuff they put in his bath, maybe they don't always apply it after his bath therfor when he comes to me in the morning it looks quite raw. I will def mention the creams to mum in the morning to see what she says. Thanks to all for listening

OP posts:
mrssnoah · 11/12/2006 23:47

but that sounds bizarre!
What loving mother in their right mind would deprive their child of the right medication?
I dont get it Kidstrak?
Do you think they are even putting the cream on at home?

could you point out that he seems a bit more distressed these days and suggest you apply it now?

Allergy tests can be done at the dermatology dept of your hospital, and a whole selectiom fof common irritants can be applied almost painlessly in cells on a large plaster on his back/arm.
They have excellent results and appear either while you wait or next day. Dead easy to do and no excuses for those parents!If it is the cats they will be told by the consultant and it could clear up both the skin and the wheezing in one go.
Good luck and let us know what happens.

Original poster
Kidstrak · 11/12/2006 23:41

well see i had thought about it but i could lose my job if anyone found out and reported it to the care commission, i also hate seeing him in so much discomfort and also i wouldn't know which of the creams to use as they are different from ds cream and its a different excema that this little one has, my son has keratosis pilaris and i always creamed him and bathed him to ease the discomfort, but theres no way i could bathe this little one as we are not allowed, although even putting on the cream would be really good to help his skin repair itself

OP posts:
Original poster
Kidstrak · 11/12/2006 23:36

i have offered on several occasions to use the creams but the mum will not let me, i have said that i will just need a signature from her on the medical form, but she says NO NEED as we do it at home, even on first visit before he came to me and they said about his excema i offered to put cream on him but they said NO i had the medical forms sitting ready to fill in. I may suggest what harpsi has said, i actually do know a friend of a friends baby who has an allergy to cats and they had a skin prick test done and it was cat hair that was causing it, but i can't mention it to them as they are friends with this little boy's mother would you beleive, would have thought they would have wanted a test or similar to find out whats causing him to be so ill all the time!

OP posts:
mrssnoah · 11/12/2006 23:34

You sound like the kind of child carer that all Mums hope to find, may I say.

Good for you for caring about this little boy in this way, I am sad that they cant even be bothered to allow you to put the cream on at lunchtime. Could you do it anyway?

I would doubt that if it was the cats, that the wheezing would stop while away from the house.

Has he been seen for asthma? It sounds like it to me

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