Started new 'nanny' job and hating it

It might have been partly a case that she'd been dying for the help, and just needed the house getting up to scratch and now that it's more ordered etc, she's happy to relax a bit.

Glad you are enjoying more - and maybe as she is getting used to you that you get more childcare duties

Oh yes and I now looking for a nanny unfortunately not in your area. I would overlook qualifications for experience and someone with good references who we all liked....sorry to go on - one last thing is try the schools and nurseries as they will pay for your training and find it hard to get staff who are enthusiastic. You would be snapped up in suffolk!

Hi- I worked as a nanny for twenty years and now a teacher. You have a degree and good experience, references from your previous position so don't feel the need to stay for a good reference as sometimes you just know that the job is not right for you. I think you would be better getting part time work as a nanny. Families find it hard to get someone part- time and as someone else said you could combine two posts. This is not the job you thought it was and you are on trial. I have been in this position myself and knew that I was good with children and didn't want to be a cleaner so left within a week. I was then allowed to sign on in those days(may have changed now) as it was a trial. As it was I got a super job straight away with a family I loved and stayed for many years. Life is too short and you need to be fulfilled....and as you have a degree you could always look into teacher training- in a year you would be qualified. Good luck

It sounds a normal mh role to me (sorry)

Is it the mums first time having help? She could be unused to it

Tread, that makes me feel marginally better. Thank you.

I keep telling myself that she's married to a wealthy high maintenance type who'd run off with his PA if she wasn't available at his whim at all times and super slim too....

Is anyone else just green with envy at this mum's life? She has a cleaner, a mother's help, parents who want to help out with the children so she can go to the gym and run errands AND no job. I'm so green I look like Grotbags.

You make a valid point actually tread

Just to point out that some people would rather scrub the bathroom than take a toddler to soft play

I have just stopped having a mother's help after three years and often thought it wasn't a job I would want to do. It's really a job for someone in their late teens or early twenties who is gaining experience, either for a job in childcare or to be a SAHM. Or possibly for a cleaner who would like the odd bit of variety.

Basically, you are there to free up the parent. She isn't going to want to be freed up to clean the bathroom. She will want you to clean the bathroom so she can read a story. Or go to the gym. In my experience of mother's helps (had four), the job is partly what you make it. If someone is very good with children and they're happy to see her, you make a point of giving them an hour with her. If their strengths lie in cooking and cleaning but not really childcare, you minimise the amount of childcare they do. Either way, you're not a professional child carer so will be seen as a big sister figure to the children and have to earn responsibility to look after them - a bit like an au pair.

You were probably very naive to expect a 50:50 split and I wonder if you know much about looking after children and running a house. You surely didn't expect the mum to clean while you looked after the children? At the same time, you're likely to end up with at least a little more childcare than you currently get. But yes, i would think it's entirely normal to take the children out for the morning so the mother's help can fly through what needs to be done.

Stick it out a bit longer. You also need to get familiar with the household stuff too and it always takes a bit longer while you figure out a house.

In a week or two use your initiative if things haven't improved and suggest a tidy up and sort of the toys for example. Ask if you can help to feed the 1 yr old, sit and have your lunch with the kids when they eat.

Ask her lots of questions too. What is she feeding the kids, can you get involved in prepping their meals. Lots of women are really territorial about their children and don't want them to become attached in any way to their nanny/childminder. She's had two kids and so has lots of experience you can learn and build from.

Yes I understand that it's disappointing. On the upside if she is telling the world and its mother than you are the "nanny" if you do move on in a few months it may be easier to sell yourself as one if you work in a small community.

What did you do at uni?

Try and get a common core skills - that may help and is cheap and easy to get

With regards to you not having any qualifications; I've worked as a sole charge nanny for nearly twenty years and I only have level 2 training. After a while, your experience and good references, sort of overtake the need for qualifications.

If I were you, I would stick it out for a couple of months (although i know from experience that that can be hard when you are not enjoying your job) and get that all important reference. Try to do the qualification needed to enable you to be ofsted registered and your first aid training. Thinking back, I used references from babysitting jobs and helping to run Sunday school at church when applying for my first job - is there any voluntary stuff you could do outside of work to build up your experience?

I don't think you would have a problem finding another job, although you might have to join up two part times. You could have a chat with some agencies to see what the job market is like in your area.

You are assuming you couldn't get a nanny job with your current qualifications and experience but with your sole charge experience au pairing you might well be able to: you never know if you don't try! Some parents would prefer practical experience and might like you and want you as their nanny even without specific qualifications.

If jobs are PT you could study further or find extra work with your days off.

Why not stay in this job just while you start applying for nanny ones and see what response you get?

I don't think your bf is being helpful: the first few days haven't gone well but it's not generally a good idea to quit immediately with nothing to go to.

It sounds like your the cleaner op!

Generally I say trust your instinct but I would give it a week

Tho if the job is mothers help and mum doesn't work then tbh you are most likely going to do the jobs she hates around the home so that she can spend more time with her kids

MH rarely have sole charge and if do childcare then usually playing with kids while mum is there or looking after them while mum goes out - but in the home

if you really want to work with children then again stick it out as you are unlikely to find a sole charge nanny job if you don't have any quals and last job was an ap role abroad

Try and stay a year and get a reference and try and get a childcare qual as well

Saying all that life is too short to be in a job you are miserable in but will you find another job / can you afford not to work if you just leave

I think you have to go with your gut instinct. Life is too short to be unhappy. But, if you decide to leave this job spend some time thinking about what is important to you and what you really want in a job then try to go for it. Good luck

Go with your gut feel. You are doing mainly a housekeeper job imo. Do you want to be a housekeeper?

Have you thought about training to be a nanny?

My advice is to stick it out. We employ a nanny and we gave the nanny easy jobs for the first few weeks while the kiddies got used to her. My youngest had separation anxiety so we took it slowly

You've only been there two days, so not surprising that you're not having much time with them yet.

If you want to get some experience, then I think you need to stick it out.