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Original poster

Son started with a childminder today-he was very, very naughty

65 replies

MyGastIsFlabbered · 07/09/2015 18:14

DS2 is 3 in 2 weeks. He had his first full day with a new childminder today and apparently he was very naughty and she had to speak to him sternly several times. I started a new job today and now I'm worried the childminder will cancel on me. How long do childminders usually give for settling in before deciding if it's not working? I'm feeling a bit anxious now.

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NickNacks · 07/09/2015 19:30

I'm a cm and I think she was right to tell you. Why has everyone said find a new cm? What has she done wrong worh communicating about the child's day? I would also say that is not typical almost 3yo behaviour.

Wolfiefan · 07/09/2015 19:30

I don't agree that is typical behaviour either. Some of that sounds dangerous and laughing at her when told off. Really? Shock

cuntycowfacemonkey · 07/09/2015 19:28

Hmm I don't agree that is typical 3 year old behaviour if I'm honest.

longdiling · 07/09/2015 19:27

Ah ok, as a Childminder I think she was right to be honest about the way he'd behaved. If she doesn't tell you then you can't work together to help combat it. And the bolting on the school run is potentially pretty dangerous. I wouldn't necessarily say that behaviour is 'typical' actually - it's quite hyper and extreme, especially in a new environment where you may expect them to be better behaved than normal.

How did you react? Did you back her up?

Original poster
MyGastIsFlabbered · 07/09/2015 19:09

Yes, he is naughty, but not all the time, I'd say he was a typical, lively 3yo really.

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FattyNinjaOwl · 07/09/2015 19:07

I would interpret that as him pushing to see where the boundaries are and see what he can get away with. A lot of children do it with new people and in new situations. She needs to give him chance to learn what he can and can't do and settle in.

Singsongsungagain · 07/09/2015 19:05

Does that match with your experience of his behaviour?

Original poster
MyGastIsFlabbered · 07/09/2015 19:02

She didn't say very naughty, that's my interpretation. He was pulling on the blinds, banging on the rabbit hutch, climbing all over the furniture, taking toys off other children and he bolted when she did the school run. When she spoke to him to tell him not to do things he just laughed at her.

OP posts:
cuntycowfacemonkey · 07/09/2015 18:59

Did she explain what he did exactly? If she said the words "he's been very naughty" I'd be having reservations about her tbh

FattyNinjaOwl · 07/09/2015 18:58

Oh and if she can't give examples and is just a fussy bugger then find a new cm

FattyNinjaOwl · 07/09/2015 18:57

What did he do?
I had a TA when DS was in reception come to me every night telling me DS had been "very silly" but couldn't actually tell me what he had done. She just didn't like him Hmm
I would ask for examples of his behaviour and discuss ways to deal with it, if he has been playing up a bit (which would be understandable, as its all new to him) that way if he has been a bit boisterous or unsettled etc, he will see that the cm and mum are working together.

Finola1step · 07/09/2015 18:52

Did cm have anything positive to say? If not, new cm.

holeinmyheart · 07/09/2015 18:52

Mmm an experienced childminder would surely understand that a 3 year ( well not even three) might be a little disturbed by a change of scenario.
He can't articulate fear or his emotions so he reacts however he can. I would look to changing my child minder. If she is telling you that he has been really really naughty on his first day, I don't think much of her.
What did she do? She spoke to him sternly.....Did she try to find out what was wrong? Or distract him? Or reassure him?

I know it must be difficult but I would see if you can find another.CM. Never mind about her what about your son's feelings. How was he after a day with her.?

Rainuntilseptember15 · 07/09/2015 18:50

Find a new cm

PowerPantsRule · 07/09/2015 18:49

I would be a bit concerned if I came home and was told my child had been 'very very naughty' on the first day. Surely it is more a case of him playing up a bit as it is all very new to him? What did he do that was so 'naughty'?

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