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Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

New Au Pair

105 replies

pnfindlay · 28/02/2015 10:42

Hi there,

My wife and I (thats right, a dad writing on mumsnet, not sure if this is allowed....) are due to have our first child. We both have fantastic careers and my wife has decided to go back to work part time. We have decided to go down the route of an Au Pair and signed up to AuPair World, we were inundated with applications (208) and narrowed it down to a manageable number. We conducted a number of Skype interviews and were lucky enough that one of our favourites was in London with her family on vacation so we had the opportunity to meet in person. This put our mind at ease as we have never done this before and you hear of all the horror stories of the web.

We have put together a very attractive package for our Au Pair. We are paying above the recommended average, covering the cost of English lessons, providing 3 days off per week inc most evenings plus 4 weeks paid holiday. She has her own en-suite room with Wifi and we will make sure she feels like part of the family and not an employee.

But we are wondering if there is any tips/advice that we should consider from some seasoned pro's that we may have missed. Has anyone ever asked their Au Pair to surrender their passport for safeguarding until trust has been built up?

Any advice is greatly appreciated.

Thanks.

OP posts:
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Schoolaroundthecorner · 28/02/2015 10:54

Do this, not to this obviously

Schoolaroundthecorner · 28/02/2015 10:54

I thought this was reading quite well until I got to the passport bit. No you absolutely cannot to this, that's insane? Surely a wind up, who in their right mind would confiscate someone's passport, that's the kind of think you read about in trafficking reports in the news.

Also I agree that newborns/very young babies should be looked after by experiences nannies not au pairs. Personally I wouldn't use an au pair unless the child was older than 2.

playftseforme · 28/02/2015 10:50

Are you asking your AP to have sole care of your newborn while your wife is at work?

elastamum · 28/02/2015 10:50

It sounds to me that what you need is a nanny not an au pair. I wouldn't even consider leaving a new born with an unqualified teenager and I expect you might feel differently about doing this once the baby is born. Au pairs are effectively visitors in your own home who are paid pocket money to help out, not cheap nannies.

And No, it. Isn't reasonable to even consider taking her passport off her!!!! If you don't trust a person then don't employ them.

Cleanbean · 28/02/2015 10:48

It sounds like you are trying to be very considerate and will be very welcoming to your new au pair. I think it is important that you sit down with her at the start and agree ground rules together. That way she can feel confident about what she can/can't do and there is no resentment building up on either side.

However, you absolutely cannot ask her to surrender her passport. You worry about a breach of trust but if I was an au pair I would be extremely suspicious of anyone who asked me to do this and it sends out completely the wrong message.