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Original poster

Nanny clearly pregnant but not telling me.

28 replies

carolinedd · 27/09/2014 18:53

My current nanny started with us back in May and we're generally very happy with her. The thing is, she now looks quite obviously pregnant and is trying to hide it with loose tops. I know that legally she doesn't have to tell us until she is 25 weeks but what I am wondering is, would any of you ask? It is really very obvious, when she started she was size 8 skinny and now has a big bump. She already has a 3 year old so it's not a huge shock to us. It would cause disruption if she is but I would be genuinely happy for her and would just like to know so we can start planning for the future. Should I brave it or is it just plain rude to ask???? Thanks for any advice.

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nannynick · 27/09/2014 19:59

I would not ask. I would however expect her to tell you at the appropriate time. Meanwhile, if there are parts of the job which she is finding hard, I would expect her to say that she is finding things difficult so between you plans can be made to adapt things if possible.

I can see that it is tempting to ask, especially if it is reasonably clear that there has been a change but there may be reasons why she wan't to withhold information for now. If your relationship is good, then I expect she will tell you before she legally has to do so.

Week 19 before week of EDD is the time Nanny will get MATB1 form.

Week 15 before week of EDD is employer notification week.
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Moreisnnogedag · 27/09/2014 19:06

Ooh I wouldn't ask. There may be a multitude of reasons she may be waiting to tell (she may have had issues and be waiting for the abnormality scan) or it may be a different health issue.

wingcommandergallic · 27/09/2014 18:57

Mmmm tough one.
Generally I would say it's rude to ask and you should wait until she tells you.

However, I can see how you would want to make plans.

If you are genuinely pleased for her and get on well then perhaps have a cup of tea and a biscuit together and casually ask her. All you need to know at this point is a rough idea when she's due. I imagine she would appreciate some reassurance from you too.