Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Paid childcare

Discuss everything related to paid childcare here, including childminders, nannies, nurseries and au pairs.

Original poster

My nanny won't give me her ofsted number

60 replies

deerkitty · 22/05/2014 06:46

Hi
Is there anywhere else I can get an ofsted number from? My nanny is on maternity leave and the tax credits people have written quite a threatening letter to me demanding all my info by a certain date. I have text and emailed her but no response. I really need it as they will stop payments if I do t provide all info.

If she was away surely she could just text me 'I'm away'.

Is there anywhere else I can get it from?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
OutragedFromLeeds · 23/05/2014 21:27

Do you live with this nanny lola? If you don't then you have no idea whether she chose to ignore the OP or just hasn't seen it/has forgotten/is very busy/has pnd/is sick.

Why do we have to assume the worst about her? It's been 3 days not 3 months!

lolamama77 · 23/05/2014 20:33

Well she chose to ignores the messages of someone who is stressed, and that's her fault ( I mean what are the odds that she doesn't receive a text and an email). It's her right to chose not to answer, but it's human to be upset about it. I would be.

OP sent one text and one email (apparently nice). That's hardly harassing the nanny. The nanny can't know that OP is stressed or upset at her ;) . OP chose to release her frustration here instead of releasing it on the nanny.

I guess that I see it differently because I know the feeling of panicking because you are struggling financially and panic about it (and that I am not really patient when people ignore my mails and texts Grin )

OutragedFromLeeds · 23/05/2014 19:32

Your attitude towards her here has been negative. It's highly likely that the negativity seeps through in your interactions with her. I understand you're having a stressful time, but it is not her fault. You lost the number. Ofsted are useless. The tax people are being unreasonable. None of that is her fault.

Original poster
deerkitty · 23/05/2014 19:21

But I've not been negative to her! I've only been negative on here. I'm so stressed about this whole thing. I'm an lp with dc one of who has sen, every day is a battle and she knows it isn't easy here. Again fine not her problem but I would reply to someone if it was me, that's all. Anyway hopefully it's done and I won't get the money stopped. It would be 1000x worse if I couldn't pay her surely.

Anyway I guess I'm just feeling sorry for myself.

OP posts:
OutragedFromLeeds · 23/05/2014 19:17

What you've done seems fine, it's the attitude that's the problem. 'I'm annoyed because she's my employee and I've given her 3 days etc.' 'She's ignoring me'. Maybe she's busy and just hasn't got round to it. Maybe she's away and her phone is dead. Maybe she meant to get back to you and forgot. Your attitude towards her is negative. Cut her some slack. You have issues, that's nit her fault. Direct your annoyance towards Ofsted or the tax credit people.

Original poster
deerkitty · 23/05/2014 19:06

Lastly I did call and left a nice message saying sorry to hassle you but if you could help that would be great.

OP posts:
Original poster
deerkitty · 23/05/2014 19:04

Also ofsted wouldn't give me the number for
Data protection purposes. They were my first port of call.

OP posts:
Original poster
deerkitty · 23/05/2014 19:03

Ok as I said, I have called ofsted and tried everything I could Think of including calling the bank as I paid
For the registration myself to see if I had
Used it as a reference number. I emailed and text she ignored it. Fine that's her choice. I have been extremely supportive of the nanny all I was asking for is the number. I have had a letter basically telling me my tax credits will stop if I don't provide all the information by Tuesday next week so it was kind of
A desperate situation. In reference to my tax credits being paid
They want to know what I was paying last year for her and now I have maternity cover what I will be paying this year. There is nothing sinister about it. But I will be absolutely screwed if they stop paying me as I'm currently paying the SMP out of
My own pocket as I've said before and paying the replacement so I'm paying out almost £1000 a month.

In the end as I said I got it from the tax credits people themselves who I had originally given it too so I have sent the info off on the understanding that the number doesn't change

Yes I might have sounded aggressive in my Mumsnet post but I have only asked her nicely. She hasn't provided it so there is not much else I can do except hope I have given them the correct number.

I'm really not a bitch I'm someone under a huge amount of financial pressure. I have no one to share it with so I ranted on here.

OP posts:
OutragedFromLeeds · 23/05/2014 16:37

Neither would I Jayne, but I also wouldn't complain that my texts and emails had gone unanswered for three days. You can't have it both ways. If you text/email so that they can respond at a time suitable to them, then you wait. If you need an immediate answer then you call. You don't email/text and then post about how annoyed you are that they haven't picked up their texts yet.

jaynebxl · 23/05/2014 16:30

Do you remember the telephone? That's what you use if you need an immediate response. Texts and emails will not always be seen/checked particularly by new mothers on maternity leave.

Interesting. I would never telephone an employee on mat leave with a little baby because it hassles people more. I would always text or email so they can reply a few hours later rather then at the moment I call when they may be feeding, sleeping etc.

Viviennemary · 23/05/2014 16:30

If she isn't actually working for you at the present time how are you getting the tax credits. Surely Ofsted has a copy of the number. It all sounds a bit strange.

PixieofCatan · 23/05/2014 16:25

Lola: I don't know about you but, if I resource a message like that at the weekend, I make a mental note to find out and deal with it later, I may text back, I may not, depends if I'm busy. Then I forget. If you want information like that y need to call and actually talk to the person, not text and email which may not even be seen for days.

Many have her the information when she starts and op lost it. That's ops problem, not her nannies. I lost my p60's, I didn't start texting and emailing my former employers to try find them or the information on them for me as I knew that I had them.

lolamama77 · 23/05/2014 16:08

Wow, you're all really aggressive about it. I am a nanny, not a parent, but I think it is about respect to answer to someone that asked you a question, baby or not. How long does it take to answer "I gave it to you when we signed the contract, I don't have time to search for it now".

I know she must be busy but it is just rude to ignore someone, sorry. I can't imagine doing that to any of my employers, even those that I didn't really liked.

OP might be a terrible employer, I have no idea, but she might also be a nice employer who has a rude nanny and panicked because she was going to be financially in huge trouble. We don't know, why be so judgemental?

OutragedFromLeeds · 23/05/2014 15:36

Do you remember the telephone? That's what you use if you need an immediate response. Texts and emails will not always be seen/checked particularly by new mothers on maternity leave.

Original poster
deerkitty · 22/05/2014 15:12

I have the info I need thank you for your advice I really wasn't being rude to her I'm just incredibly stressed about this. Because the government haven't paid me I'm paying her SMP out of my pocket I'm petrified they are going to stop my tax credits which is paying her. As for her moving that isn't an issue I just said she didn't tell me and my flowers etc had gone to her old address. Yes I would tell my employer I had moved but that's by the by.

OP posts:
Artandco · 22/05/2014 15:04

Sorry it sounds like your problem.
A) get a nanny tax comp at in future. If your doing it yourself it should be in your records,
b) 3 days is nothing, I would have sent one text and waited 3 days before calling again. It's rude to badger someone that much.
C) they aren't working for you though are they, they are on maternity. If someone wants to spend 9 months in Timbuktu on maternity you have no say and they won't be contactable.
D) surely it doesn't matter where your nanny lives, who she marries, what cars she drives etc. if they disclose fine but otherwise as long as they arrive at work and fulfil work duties as required it shouldn't matter. Do you tell your employers everything?

NatashaBee · 22/05/2014 14:59

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Blondeshavemorefun · 22/05/2014 14:50

Sounds like you don't have a close relationship with your nanny if you didn't even know she had moved??

How long had nanny worked for you and how old is her baby?

TheScience · 22/05/2014 14:30

She's on maternity leave - your tax credits and poor record keeping are really not her problem.

PixieofCatan · 22/05/2014 14:28

Jesus, 3 days and you're "not impressed" with her for not responding?! She is on maternity, there are bigger things on her mind!

Original poster
deerkitty · 22/05/2014 12:16

Meant to say I sent flowers I don't want them!

OP posts:
Original poster
deerkitty · 22/05/2014 12:15

Also in my defence I sent one very nice text message, one email following up saying sorry to hassle you and a very nice message. I haven't gotten shitty with her once.

OP posts:
Original poster
deerkitty · 22/05/2014 12:13

The irony is I want flowers and baby gifts but it turned out she had moved house without telling me. Anyway as you say I have it now. I did have it on file somewhere but have not been able to find it. I have saved it now and won't bother her again.

OP posts:
Blondeshavemorefun · 22/05/2014 11:50

I would have popped round with a card flowers and ask for it in person

Tbh she has more important things on her mind - think back when you first had your baby and where time went

Also she showed you her certificate and if the number was that important to you you should have written it down or taken a photocopy and filed it

It's not your nannies fault you can't find it and 3days is nothing and again sending shitty rude texts wasn't the best thing to do

Glad you now have it. Keep it safe

Original poster
deerkitty · 22/05/2014 10:53

I have asked very nicely and each time I asked and said
I don't want to put you under pressure but I do need it. Yes I might sound like a bitch but I am currently paying for her SMP out of my own pocket as the government still haven't paid me as well as the replacement childcare so it's costing me £1000 a month that I don't have. If they stop my tax credits because of one missing piece of information I'm royally fucked

OP posts:
Swipe left for the next trending thread