In-laws abroad are livid about our decision to hire a nanny. Have told us we're making a horrible decision, exercising the worst judgement imaginable, putting our kids at risk, etc. And bc I'm a SAHM, they aren't short of criticism of my inability to cope on my own.
We got to hear for the gazillionth time how they managed on their own w/ 3 kids under 4 w/o any help from their massive extended family. Apparently, going to the grandparent's every weekend for a home-cooked meal and, I'm sure, the chance to let ext fam play w/ the kids for a couple of hours didn't count as help.
We have no family in the UK. Good friends live on the other side of London & aren't available to help. We've luckily found some ad hoc help from local au pairs, but we're still largely in survival mode w/ a 1yo who rarely sleeps during the day & is up several tomes a night, and a 2 1/2 yo who can be v helpful w/ her little brother but is still only 2 & also very volatile.
I am too often sacrificing quality time w/ them in order to do laundry or try to make a decent home-cooked meal, etc. DH & I have zero quality time together. Zero.
I know we're in an incredibly fortunate position to be able to hire help, even if it may be only for a few months. I know a lot of people would kill to be in my position, able to be w/ their kids 24/7. We're not "leaving" our kids to be "raised by strangers", as my in-laws say. And we recognize that they're simply concerned for the kids' welfare. We've explained that it'll be a shared charge situation, but they just see it as "extreme". No one they knows ever had a nanny. You just get on with it by yourselves.
It's actually DH who really pushed for a ft nanny; I was reluctant & happy to settle for some pt help, until I met a wonderful nanny socially & saw how amazing she was with her charges. When I found out she was job hunting, it seemed the perfect opportunity to give it a go.
We've offered to introduce them to the nanny when they come over for Xmas (she doesn't start w/us til January), but right now they're refusing, saying they wouldn't be comfortable. They'd rather just keep imagining a monster.
I suppose this is mostly just a rant/vent, but if anyone has been through similar, I'd be curious how you dealt w/it. FTR, I usually get on just fine with them.