Recovering from csection & severe SPD. Norland Nanny useful to help me?

Also, can you get gradparents or anyone in to help? I howled once down the phone to my MIL when DH was away and she drove down and did a night shift!

Do you have anyone who can help with the Saturdays? Could you maybe pay your au pair a nanny rate for those three days to work supervised by you.

This is rather blunt, but aside from the Saturday issue it sounds like your DH needs to pull his socks up a bit. Surely your DD is of an age where she's a bit more independent, and he can focus on DS? Was he a hands-off parent the first time round, so he's totally at sea with a newborn? Also, if he's not working at the moment why isn't he doing the night shift?

Is you dh doing night shift with baby? I'd either say he does night shift or get someone in to help. C-section recovery can go on for weeks especially if you're not getting the rest you need.

For my colleagues let me know days you'd prefer worked and then I can hopefully find someone and can give you contact details.

having help is a huge expense, and i do understand that and depending on how many nights you are looking at maybe just over £1.5K for say a month of 3 nights a week

do you honestly think your joint finances can afford that or is dh stingy or that you can afford but he doesnt want to

you need help, so either he can take time off or pay someone to help you even for a few weeks

www.nightnannies.com

Hope you can get some help soon. If you want to look yourself then try childcare.co.uk. I'd recommend Maternity Solutions and Dearnas.

Look for someone with either NEST or MNT post natal carer qual, recent CRB or DBS (criminal check) and paediatric first aid.

Then look for experience. Someone with a minimum of 5 years experience as a MN or NN - this means they will have seen plenty of families and be able to adapt to each situation.

Check CV for any breaks in work. Also check references. I would do these checks either for agency NN's or finding one on childcare, most NN's will be joined with agencies as well.

Next thing to look for at phone interview stage is personality match. Choose someone who you feel most comfortable with. After a phone interview I've usually started that night. I've had quite a few emergency positions and it moves quite fast from first finding out about the family to do the night/day shift.

A good night nanny/maternity nurse will be able to work out what your family needs. Get as many nights as you can afford. I too have slept on sofas/blow up beds. Babies really at such a young age won't know the difference between upstairs and downstairs and night and day. That comes with time and setting up the day routine. You could have a night nanny arrive at 10pm do the dream feed and any night feeds and have bottles all sterilised and leave by 7/8am. It really does sound like you need the extra support so hopefully you can find someone to suit you soon.

You could just get her a fold up bed from argos, they're not expensive.
There's a few nice sounding maternity nurses on childcare.co.uk. one says available from next Monday for a couple of weeks.

As long as night feedings are done quietly with minimum light, it won't matter if your baby is upstairs or downstairs.

You can't really expect an au pair to get up at 3am.

Hope you're feeling better soon, you probably only need a couple of weeks of help until you're feeling more normal.

i had a few weeks of night nannies after DT's and subsequent birth. Had to sleep otherwise I would have got psychotic. It made all the difference during the day with the nights sorted. Also they slept on a makeshift bed in the living room to avoid disturbing everyone else.

Was excruciatingly expensive but worth every penny.

great minds owl :)

Sorry Blonds crossed with you saying same thing :)

Hi Katiejon
I work as a Night Nanny - sorry not your area and booked at the moment.
But just to say, I have often had baby downstairs in Moses Basket or crib. I turn the lights off and read on my IPad or watch films on it. Happy to have sofa or chair. A newborn baby will not know what room he/she is in. The routine of sleeping in crib/basket is enough.
A night nanny would enable you to sleep soundly knowing the baby is cared for. Sleep will make you feel much better. Also do ring your GP and midwife and insist on a home visit if you are not feeling right.
Please feel free to Pm me I would be happy to talk.

the odd jobs that i have had and downstairs on sofa, the baby still sleeps 7-7 by 3/4mths tops

as long as room is dimly lit/quiet tbh the baby wont know if moses basket is downstairs/living room or upstairs/bedroom - or put to bed at 7ish upstairs and nn bring down stairs at 10/11 dream feed and keep with her

its whatever works out best for you/your family

tell the au pair things are a bit stressful at the moment and see if she agrees to do two hours overtime per day for the first six weeks.

We never have any diary in our house because of similar issues so M&S Paella is good plus some things from the Cook range - shop in Muswell hill.

Apparently babies only start responding to the cicadian clock at around three months so don't fret about that.

I have been known to sleep on a sofa :) a bed is nice but not everyone has a spare room esp once have kids and ap

Bloody comfortable compared to a single lumpy bed I had once in one of my night jobs

In the end the mat nurse or night nanny is there to look after bubs - if I get sleep then great and mostly I sleep 11.30/3 and 3.30/6ish most nights but if I didn't then not a problem iyswim

When you interview a NN show her where she will sleep and I'm sure no one will complain about a lack of bed

What area are you in? There are a few of us on mn so maybe one of us is local x