Am I being annoying?

You are getting some pretty harsh responses. Maybe as youve realised you don't need to text every day but it is perfectly understandable to miss him. Your cm may be busy but doesn't want to ignore you so just sends a brief message. If anything was wrong then believe me...she would be ringing!

I understand it's hard for you to be away from your ds but I think yes, it's a bit much after 2 months as if she's like most, she'll have other children and be pretty busy. I used to have a parent who did this all the time and would panic if I didn't reply straight away (I might have been doing nappies, busy playing etc.) so I had to make my messages shorter because I just didn't have the time to reply properly. We also now have to have policies about the use of mobile phones when working (well I think so, we had to before I stopped minding in March?). We got past all that though as this was 6 and half years ago (started when baby was 8 weeks old and stayed until I stopped working). I always sent the odd text during the day with a photo but would have got annoyed with daily texting. Having said that, I've had those who've been toilet training, not been quite themselves for whatever reason so on those days there may be texts back and forth to discuss things (but I'd know which parents to spend more time texting as some would get annoyed with ME if I was to keep texting )

I always text parents back with a little update and a pic on something like whatsapp whenever possible as long as it didn't hinder my ability to care for the children.

On the flip side I used to hate texting parents when we were out at groups as I always felt like people thought I was just on Facebook etc instead of caring for the children - not good for my business image

"Harsh"???!!!!

Good heavens, what sensitive flowers!

Only two childminders have said they wouldn't like it. The only person who said it would drive her insane is, in fact, a parent.

I am CM and I have a daily diary with all the families and use it every day, and I encourage the parents to write in it too, ie if the child slept badly, or is teething, etc. It's often a rush at the beginning and end of the day I find it easier that way. Personally, I would expect that parents would text me during the settling in period and maybe the first few weeks, but after that I don't think it's necessary unless you sit down with your CM and explain that you miss him, and hope that she can text you a couple of times a day just to tell you what he's up to. THat's understandable!

I generally don't mind receiving texts like this but I do sometimes feel I spend more time than is necessary trying to think of a reply that isn't identical to the reply from the day before .

Also, I do sometimes get a bit fed up of receiving texts in the evening, asking for every little detail of the day, even after a fairly detailed handover and sometimes ignore them

Don't think much of the CMs who say they'd be driven made by this tbh. Ok you might not have time for long responses but if you're happy with a 'he's ok' then it won't kill the CM to do that. Especially if you don't get any kind of daily diary. I'm really surprised at the responses you've had here. Don't feel bad OP. if its that much trouble for your current CM, find one who can manage this.

Agree, harsh on OP. I'm a nanny so only one parent, but happy for mum to phone or text each day. Normal to miss them and wonder what they are doing.

I have worked in nursery and as a nanny and it wouldn't bother me in the slightest! In fact I had a parent at the nursery who called twice a day every day!

I don't understand the harsh responses you are getting!!

I think you are lovely that you miss your little one and I think it's perfectly understandable!

Wouldn't bother me in the slightest. I manage a nursery and have 2 mums that call everyday to see how their child is and they have been going for 3 years. Did have to ask one of them to liaise with dad though as they both used to call (they were together)

Maybe it's a generation thing. I don't like texting and for me it is a chore. I don't even use my phone much, and see it more as something to have with me for emergencies, rather than something that is permanently glued to my ear. I am happy to have a chat about the day at the end of the day, and would of course get in touch in an emergency, but texting to say all is exactly as you would hope it would be would seem a bit pointless once the early settling in days were over.

I only text if I know he was unsettled at drop off or has been unwell like recently we had some issues with urine retention and gp was considering referral to urology - he wasnt unwell in himself just struggling to PU and I text to check he had done a wee by lunchtime otherwise I was going to have to consider my options otherwise I let her get on with it, sometimes she texts to say had a nice time doing x,y and z but not everyday.

There is no requirement for cm or nurseries or anyone else following the eyfs to do a daily diary or food diary. Cm are expected to communicate with parents and other settings but this can be done verbally and doesn't need to be written down anywhere.

As a cm I would probably be getting a bit fed up with daily texts. I generally don't bother or forget to text friends and family back, as I hate texting, so I can't imagine I would appreciate texting a parent back. And as a parent, if I text and didn't get a reply I would fear the worst and wonder what the problem was. I hate being away from my children and want to know exactly what they are doing all the time, but I have learnt over time this isn't possible (they are at school now) and I rarely have any contact with the teachers.
If your cm is truly ok with it and it works for you both then it's really no one else's business.

I've had several text chats with a parent today, because her son is on his first day of toilet training. It has been nice for her to be able to celebrate his success with me as the day's gone along. I have not sent any texts to the other families.

I am really surprised at the responses you're getting here OP.

I would think that a text, once a day, to a childminder that knows you well, to ask how your baby is, is quite acceptable and to be expected.

We have a nanny for our DC, and although I've not felt that I need to send a text, I certainly woudl if I wanted to. And if that was once a day (it is just the once! Its hardly haranguing the CM) then I would think that was ok.

And by the sounds of it, your CM thinks so too.

I'm a cm, I do a daily diary with photos, but i also txt parents through the day at least once, more if they've had any concerns about their dc when they've dropped off, it takes seconds to send a photo or txt, let's them know lo's are fine and tbh it's what I'd expect if my dc were with a cm. Some days are really hectic and I forget to txt or to reply but it's not a chore and it certainly doesn't impact on the time I spend caring for the children.

my DD (2.11) is with a CM 4 days a week - i send a little text in my lunch hour just saying "hey how's my little munchkin", not checking up or anything, i just want to know how she is. TBH if i text late my CM will text me saying what's been going on etc

she is my daughter and because she's with a CM does this mean that i am supposed to not think about her or just wonder if she's ok, what she's up to???

if it makes you feel better sending the text do it - CM is happy with you doing it, so what's the harm x

I only text if I am worried my daughter is coming down with something! The rest of the time I am trying to cram a full time job into part time hours so no time to text!

omg - I couldn't cope with this. surprised she hasn't given notice tbh.
are you a terribly anxious person??
and why are you sitting around thinking about what he is doing all day - I assume you have a childminder as you have work to do?

I'm a nanny my current boss was like that at the start to understaable. But two months later and in her case being a cm looking after more children more stuff to do. As others have said I'm sure she's finding it abit annoying now sorry.

I send parents texts during settling in and if I know they have had a difficult morning. Parents occasionally text me, but you can guarantee I will be half way through changing a nappy, driving the car, or whatever and can't reply (and then might forget).

So basically since he has started you have texted around 36 times checking he's ok [that's if hes been 3 days a week for the past 3 months] I can see why she's not so detailed now

No requirement for a daily diary. The only requirement I've heard of (and can't find written anywhere because they change their minds so often!) is that under 2s used to have a food diary. And accident reports, of course.

It's supposed to be up to us how we communicate with parents: some like a diary; others would never look at it and prefer a verbal handover.