Suprised at CM's request. What to say?

so what did you do op?

collect early or allow your dc to go with cm?

Would you prefer for your CM's son to have nobody there cheering him on so that your 2.9 yo DD doesn't miss a nap?

I think you are a really out of order and only thinking of the impact on yourself i.e your non-rested daughter will "ruin" your afternoon.

Can't a buggy go in the car too?????

I think that you should give the cm some leeway here unless she is regularly wanting to change routines.

I regularly put myself out for parents and work on a "swings and roundabouts" principle. If children are tired enough they will sleep anyway. Perhaps a middle ground would be for you to arrange for the child to stay longer with the cm so that the child can have a delayed nap whilst you do whatever you have planned for the afternoon???

My children are looked after by a CM, actually a family of CMs, and I've always liked the fact that they've taken part in school runs as babies, and gone out.

I would hate to be OP's CM if I needed to actually take a day off for something that I couldn't just take mindees along to.

For parents like you I have three words.
Get A Nanny

You sound bitter maybe you should stay at home and care for yor child

PFB (much).

I take the children I look after out and about all over the place and part of the reason I became a childminder is to provide an interesting upbringing for my daughter, be able to look after her and earn, and to be available with a flexible career to attend things like this. I'm sure she wouldn't do it if she didn't think your daughter could cope. If it really is a problem I would discuss with her, she sounds reasonable and would probably be horrified that you thought she was not taking your daughters needs into consideration.

Sorry the body I didn't get it was a joke. Looking again I can see it was, sorry.

ah, sorry to say but PFB. A missed nap isn't the end of the world you know

East u did get that I was joking right???? Seriously the op thinks her child's daily nap time is sooooo crucial that it's more important than a once a year sports day??? Seriously???

Sorry but I think YABU.

If my DD was at home with me and I needed to go to DS's sports day, then she'd come with me and miss a sleep. I fully expect that the same thing might happen when she's with her CM. If you want childcare that's always structured in a certain way, then you need a nursery or a nanny.

My CM is flexible in terms of hours etc and so I think it's reasonable that I show that flexibility in return. And she's given you options. She could have taken the day off in which case you would have needed to find childcare that day.

As a one of this is fine, not all babies can sleep in buggies. So I can sort of see the ops point.

Thing is with childMinders they say what they are doing you don't really have much say if you can afford a nanny it's so much more flexible and geared towards your child.

If someone on my firm wanted to watch a sports day I would have to take a days holiday.

The body I didn't think the bitch comment was necessary.

YABU and a bit nasty tbh " I don't imagine I'll be able to go and see my child's sports day when I'm at work". Pay for a nanny if you want to be able to call all the shots.

Sometimes short notice is unavoidable. My DS once told us that he was playing in a concert the next day! He said he'd been keeping it as a surprise. It was that, all right!!

I asked the parents very nicely and made it crystal clear that they would be doing me a huge favour and luckily they were able to collect a bit earlier. If they hadn't be able, I wouldn't have gone.

I know we had only been with her little while as after 3wks she went on hols (we knew this) and this was her 2nd day back working (our 1st day as was a tues) so a little cheeky but as someone once said dont ask dont get (or as she found out she didnt get- not coz I was being a cow just short notice).

we have a new childminder now due to old one having new baby and R gets to go out and about loads more and sometimes miss' his nap or its shortened but thats life and would rather he had the experiences he has - he can catch up on sleep on nursery days and at weekends with us if need be but never been a problem.

nothing like giving you notice eastmids

as its an odd day I wouldnt worry about it, last summer my childminder asked me the morning I dropped off if could collect at lunchtime as it was her sons sports day that day or she would have to take him with her and him nap in pushchair and it might be noisy (he was 10mths) I said do that then to short notice for me to get back to her for 1pm.

Whole point of childminder is that everything is within reason and flexible just like you would be at home sometimes naps have to happen in buggy/car its part of life

sorry to say if you want fixed rest times nurserys are a better option.

Thebody, you do realise I had a mouthful of coffee when I read that

Having a childminder means your child does family type activities - like going to a sports day. She is perfectly entitiled to go to her sons sports day and take your child too.
I suspect that you're more annoyed about your child ruining your plans....but then again you could just let your childminder take your PFB to the sports day like any sane parent would!

As others have said yabu - it's a fun day out and a one off - I understand that your dd needs a sleep at 2/9 - most of my charges have slept 2hrs in pm even at 4yrs old - but thus means that they need to fit in with other siblings and would happily sleep in car or buggy - essential for days out.

Sometimes they would get less sleep and be grumpy but it's for one day and important to your cm

And most parents try and attend sports day but if they can't then nice to have someone there cheering them - Maybe you need to book a day off when your child has sports day

I still don't understand why dd can't sleep in a buggy there?

yabu.

The principle of CM is that a child is looked after in a family home, in a family setting. By it's nature a family setting means that sometimes there will be different events. It's a one-off, any child who is part of the family and has older siblings will be working around different events like this.

A sports day is a legitimate event for a CM to take a child to, I think.

If you want / need a bespoke unbreakable timetable you need a nursery or a nanny.

It maybe that at almost 3 your dd will start to cope better without her nap?

Remind me again why I don't want to be a childminder.

thebody -

I am surprised,amazed and disgusted that this cm puts a once a year event like watching her kids sports day above the needs of your dds nap time.

What a total bitch.