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Original poster

Parents sending children to cm while they are on holiday themselves

663 replies

susiemumof · 17/05/2012 12:29

Not looking for a argument or aibu type thread.

Am new to cm and have a 6mo mindee 60 hours per week, mum has a day off next week (which she did not even need to tell me about) but has said she will still send said mindee as she would like a day to herself.

I actually offer a large discount on days when mindees are not with me so can't even put it down to wanting to get her monies worth.

Was just really wondering how common other childminders have found this?

It's obviously no problem for me to have the child and I am loving my new job, it just makes me a bit sad for the baby itswim.

OP posts:
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CailinDana · 17/05/2012 13:19

No, not directed at you Agnes.

KatieMiddleton · 17/05/2012 13:18

FFS it's one day. A well rested, happy parent has got to be a good thing for a baby.

Would it be ok if mum spent the day having her smear test, eyes tested and having a well woman check? Or can we judge if she's getting her roots done, having a new hair cut and shopping for some post-baby body clothes?

Anyone who comes out with shit like "I don't understand why some people have children and then don't want to spend time with them" needs a course in empathy.

Juule · 17/05/2012 13:18

Cailin Some things will be acceptable and some things will seem outrageous to some people. We don't know why the mum in the op had a day off or why she chose to leave the baby with c/m so couldn't say one way or the other. I don't see how you could condemn her without knowing more details. And even then.....?

Maybe she spends a lot of time with the baby up through the night - who knows.
But presumably she is happy that the c/m is taking good care of her baby. So not irresponsible.

CMOTDibbler · 17/05/2012 13:17

I have the odd day off while ds has been in childcare (8-5.30, 5 days a week from 18 weeks if you need to know), and I pack those days with luxurious things like doctor, dentist, optician, haircut, etc etc. It usually starts with something I need to do on a specific day like hospital appointment, then filled with other stuff that had been put off.
No family help/support so all time outside work was/is spent as a family, but the odd day to do stuff saves my sanity

AberdeenAgnes · 17/05/2012 13:17

Actually, if she's a single parent I bet she really could do with the break.

FunnysInLaJardin · 17/05/2012 13:17

oh I'll join in with the bingo. 'Why have children if you don't look after them yourself' TICK

AberdeenAgnes · 17/05/2012 13:16

Was that to me cailin? Grin I honestly can't be all doom and gloom about it as I've never seen the effect of something like this on the child (be it negative or positive), if that makes sense? So I can only comment on the effect on the parents.

Wouldn't do it myself though.

FunnysInLaJardin · 17/05/2012 13:16

It has everything to do with womens rights and attitudes to women who work and tbh the attitudes on here stink. How dare you judge?

Original poster
susiemumof · 17/05/2012 13:14

This has got nothing at all to do with womans rights!

I have posted about the mum as she is a single parent, had she been part of a couple and the dad had a day off I would have posted exactly the same thing asking if other childminders had experienced this!!

My op was about a parent still sending her baby to me while she has a day off not about whether she should be working I'm the first place.

Funnily enough I actually NEED parents to be working to use my service (not many people could afford childcare that had no money coming in)

OP posts:
HolyCameraConfusionBatman · 17/05/2012 13:14

In one of my jobs (nanny, not childminder) the mum didn't work. I worked the weekend and 3 weekdays and the 2 weekdays I had off the children went to nursery 8am-6pm.

I really don't think the OP is judging. It is possible to feel sad for the baby and understanding of the mum at the same time.

Fourlotsoftrouble · 17/05/2012 13:14

Its just puzzling why some people have children then spend the whole time making arrangements for others to look after themHmm

Saltire · 17/05/2012 13:13

but my post wasn't about a mums working hours, the OP asked if any CMs had encountered parents putting children in childcare when they weren't at work, and my reply said that I had mindees for 10 1/2 hours a day while the dad didn't work at all.

CailinDana · 17/05/2012 13:13

Yes, children don't really matter do they? As long as they don't get in the way then anything you do with them is acceptable Hmm

Juule · 17/05/2012 13:12

Not sure it has anything to do with women's rights.

Isn't it more about parents and people's attitudes to them leaving children in childcare?

Just incidental that in the op the parent is the mother?

MissBeehivingUnderTheMistletoe · 17/05/2012 13:12

MN Bingo "Will no one think of the ^children"

goodygumdrops · 17/05/2012 13:12

Im judging OP. and wouldn't blame you if you were too!

MissBeehivingUnderTheMistletoe · 17/05/2012 13:11

I'm afraid so Funnys. Sad

CailinDana · 17/05/2012 13:11

It's not about women Funnys, it's about children. I would think exactly the same thing if a father had a day off and still sent his child to the CM for 12 hours.

AberdeenAgnes · 17/05/2012 13:09

Not a c/m but I think if you're comfortable with having a baby in childcare for 60 hours a week then you probably feel comfortable having a day off without them too.

I'm a control freak and hated leaving my 13mo with a c/m for 15 hours a week when I worked so would never have done this. But others I know who used full time nursery etc would take days off to do things like have lunch together/go to ikea, that kind of thing. And it seemed to do their sanity and relationships a world of good, so each to their own I guess.

FunnysInLaJardin · 17/05/2012 13:09

god, after 90 years of womens rights, are we seriously still only here?

AThingInYourLife · 17/05/2012 13:08

I would send my 4 year old 2 year old to the CMs if I had a day off when she was working.

But when DD1 was 6 months old and I worked FT, no way would I have done that. And she spent less than 40 hours a week in childcare.

MissBeehivingUnderTheMistletoe · 17/05/2012 13:07

Where's ScottishMummy? I need here here for the "precious moment mamas" moment Grin

CailinDana · 17/05/2012 13:06

Yes, Funnys, how terrible to think a baby would want to be with her mother. Far more important that her mother gets her hair done or mows the lawn.

FunnysInLaJardin · 17/05/2012 13:06

Just hoping CM in general are not so judgemental of their clients Cailin. BTW this thread is not about CM really is it, it's about whether women should work and if so how much is too much Angry

Juule · 17/05/2012 13:06

"They not little for long it's precious time."

For who? They may not be little for long but they are with you all their long life. Some people are better with babies and some when they are older.