Parents sending children to cm while they are on holiday themselves

Ahh sorry Aberdeen, I hadn't seen that (or rather I saw that, but didn't note it because it didn't register that the comment had been made directly to her, by her DC's NN, rather that it was a general comment made by a general NN).

Also, what Duelling said.

(Scrolling on the iPhone's a bitch isn't it drives me insane)

Oh right. So a kind avoid ALL childminders based on the opinions of one kind of thing?

I think it's because if you send your child to one childminder who is their sole carer and who has this attitude it's very different to sending them to a nursery where there are several carers and not every one will be judging you. I know that many of the workers in the nursery I use have children who are in childcare and so they understand what it's like to be a working out of the home mother rather than to be a mother who has chosen to childmind as a way to stay at home with her children but is still sniffy about the parents of the children she minds.

(scrolls back manically on iPhone)

That was duffybeatmetoit who said that the nursery staff member made a judgey comment

who was that then?

I dont understand why people think only childminders may have this attitude but not nursery staff. Someone on the thread has already said their nursery judged them for doing this

Absolutely - OP should be working, not MNing

I also think a 6 mth baby doesn't have the ability to differentiate between morning / evening / 1 hour / 10 hours. Sometimes when she wakes up it's the human she spends all day with. Sometimes its the human she spends all night with. The baby has no idea, and doesn't care.

But in any case.

Nah, I don't think its a joke. I think that the OP is a shite fake CM that has posted a judgemental OP on purpose to get the WOHMs/SAHMs/CM users/Nursery users frothing and sniping at each other.

...and it worked.

It's probably all bollocks.

Ahhh, so it's the time of day of online bitching that bothers you, not the fact of it.

Fair enough.

Yes, I'm very selfish.

But even I would balk at taking an entire day of "me time" away from a baby who saw so little of me.

I can't credit that the baby spends every weekend with her Dad though, that makes me think that the whole situation must be a joke.

I think a few people missed the OP's later post when she said the baby goes for the entire weekend to her dad's. So the mother has the entire weekend off, presumably most weekends.

Anyway, I'm sorry I've upset people. I think my views on this are totally coloured by my own upbringing, which was shite. I hate to think of children being in my situation, it really upsets me and brings out the bitch in me.

no more or less likely

Actually highly unlikely during the working day.

...and I think its a great advantage that DD's Nursery Workers didn't know anything about me. It wasn't about me - it was ALL about DD.

What, you dont give your DD's your undivided attention when they are in your care....how selfish.

Very interesting points. Susiemumof I can totally see where you're coming from and at the same time I understand those mums who have responded with some hostility. There's nothing wrong with someone wanting a little time to themself even at the detriment of not spending time with their kids. I disagree though with those parents who pass their children on to CMs to the point that the kids end up being brought up by them, as in the film The Help, or who genuinely have no interest in the child's life. If that was true in this instance, then I agree it is a shame for the mindee. But if the parents just want a little time to themselves, I can't see any problem with that. Tricky one.

I'm still really glad my children are looked after in a comfortable, relaxed home environment by a husband and wife crack-CM team.

I couldn't give a shite if they post anonymously about me on the Internet and think it no more or less likely than one of several nursery workers would, except they have the advantage (or disadvantage, if you consider it preferable that the people who mind your children barely know you) of having more material to bitch about.

I MN when I look after the DDs, so I don't consider that to be a problem either.

Mosman - seconded

I didn't realise cm's worked 12 hour days! Is that common?

Only read first and last pages so sorry if I have missed salient points.

When I was working FT with a 6 mo (non sleeping) baby, the only thing that saved my sanity was sending her to a cm for a full week (including nights). I was exhausted to the point of contemplating suicide - I then weighed up how my DD would fare with one week without me rather than a life time without me and logic helped me overcome the guilt of a whole week with a CM. If someone has zero support network (no grandparents in view, no friends with DC yet) then life can be a 24/7 grind and sometimes you want to stop the world and get off.

In answer to the original question, I imagine it's not unusual for a working parent to want a day off that is child free for a whole host of reasons, one of which might be sleep.

It sounds like you are a lovely CM, incidentally, OP. The mum must rely on you a lot. I will be forever grateful to my CM.

This is why I also wouldn't use a childminder.
I hope the woman concerned is lying in bed having strawberry's licked off her bum by a gorgeous other half or somebody else's.
Whatever she's doing it's none of your business.

So, there is people on here who are happy to judge a single parent, who works 12 hrs a day, for wanting 1 day off, when she is probably planning to rest a bit and possibly squeeze in errands which you can't run over the weekend. Wow.

And then a long list of prejudices about childcare (evil), selfish parents (who either work too much or don't work enough), lazy sahm who use childcare to go to the gym (lol) etc etc.

Using childcare when you are not at work is not very controversial.

It's putting a 6 month old baby in childcare for a full day off when she spends 60 hours a week in childcare that seems odd (to some of us who apparent live in the 70s/50s/19th Century)

....and this is exactly why I am glad I chose a Nursery for DD and not a childminder. I would have been furious, disgusted and bloody upset if I thought my choices were being bandied about on the Internet and my childminder was this judgemental.

...but then, I'd be pretty judgemental of childminders that posted on MN when they should have been minding my child...

My CM doesn't charge me at all for days I don't use as long as I let her know ahead of time.

We plan 3 months ahead on a rolling basis.

Sorry for double post - bloody iphone

Hi op I work at a nursery not the same as cm I know but just wanted to say ime its very common for parents to still use childcare for their dcs when there not at work.

I looked after a baby from 4 months to 3 years he came to nursery from 7.30 until 5.30 all year round. His mum was a teacher. His dad kept him off occasionally on his days off he worked all year round. Sometimes he went early on a Friday if they were going away for weekend. He loved being ay nursery and to be honest I think he saw us as part of his family.

Other parents who were students brought their dcs in the school holidays too. And lots of parents brought their dcs when they were on days off work.

So yes I think its very common.

At my nursery I introduced a two week payment free break to be used in the year. To make sure children were not attending 50 hours a week all year round and also so families could afford a holiday! 2 weeks fees goes quite a long way!

The parents really liked our policy.

This is one reason why I wouldn't use a childminder.

Athing and apologies for missing where you said it was different for babies.