Parents sending children to cm while they are on holiday themselves

I wasn't arguing that having nails done was a reasonable use of time FFS, I was arguing that you don't have a clue whether she's having her nails done or bikini shopping or having 2 hours of root canal surgery, or a job interview, or any number of essential things that can't be done at the weekend and are best done without a baby if at all possible

Who said the mother was having her nails done? OP doesn't know what she was doing (and yet she chose to judge, huh.)

Faye, my DD was looked after by her father for 2 years whilst I was at work, and then went to nursery from 2.5 yrs till 3 yrs when we moved overseas. I think I met her primary nursery nurse 3 or 4 times. NN didn't know me, so would have no reason to judge me.

How do you know she has the weekend to herself? She could be working. No one really knows the full situation.

ha evedallas. dont worry, am sure the girls looking after your kids in nursery would never judge you

NOT

LtEveDallas, Nursery's judge too!

the baby's 6 months, it can go to things with you

and if the mothers having her nails done instead of spending time with her baby she rarely sees to me that says cant be arsed

you can be assured [ ] can't be arsed Or you can be assured they have something else to do that isn't baby-friendly. Or you can be assured that it is fuck all to do with you.

Like I said earlier - that attitude is exactly why I would choose a nursery over a childminder. I think judging other parental choices stinks and I wouldn't want my precious child around anyone with views like that - not with one to one care.

Faye you cannot "be assured" - don't be bloody ridiculous. Last time I sent my DCs to school and took the day off work was because I was having breast screening. All was fine as it turned out but I couldn't have done it on the weekend, or taken DCs with me.

OP's client might be having a chest X-ray or she might be having her nails done - neither you nor she have the least clue. In a few months time the OP will probably know the score.

"she is being judged for having a day to herself"

She has every weekend to herself. Isn't that enough?

I've always sent the DC's to nursery on my days off.

I have a whole week off soon and they will be at school + nursery every day. I have months of stuff to catch up with (am almost at cracking point), that includes going to the gym and catching up with a couple of people.

I'm feeling quite sorry for the mother tbh, she is back at work 60 hours a week when her baby is only 6 months old, she's separated from her baby's father, and she is being judged for having a day to herself . She possibly has PND and needs that day to herself.

op, I've childminded and I can tell you some people can't be arsed with their own kids, simple as that

the baby you mind sounds lovely, you must enjoy having her, but if the parents send her to you 60 hours then don't want a rare day off with her you can be assured they fall into the category of cant be arsed

of course childminders judge parents, we are mums(usually) first, childminders second, if all the parents on this thread are so sure of their choices then they wont/shouldn't give a rats arse if their childminder judges them

anyway the op was asking childminders their views,as she is new to childminding, she wasn't asking for the usual working- mum- defensive- posts you read so much on here

so go on, flame me instead of her

I don't think the op is being judgemental, she only posted on here with her opinion she did not say the mother should be with baby on her day of I think she was a bit shocked that someone who left her baby for
that amount of time would choose to do it when she didn't need to.

Gosh I have 2 little ones in nursery 3 days a week 8.30-4.30pm and I occassionally have a day off with my DH when he's on school hols (he is a teacher), maybe 2 or 3 times a year and it is lovely!! Otherwise either I am at work or looking after 2 DCs. I need a day off to myself occassionally. I feel like I do see my DC's enough during the week, as I get about 4hours a day on working days and 2 whole days with them and also the weekend.

DH works full time, but we still send the DCs to nursery for the 3 days a week when he is on school hols. He has a stressful job. And it's not even that he just sits on his bum. He gets lots of jobs done, like clean the house from top to bottom, DIY jobs etc that is impossible to do with two little ones around. So does that make him a bad father? He is at home most days by 6pm, so he is there for dinner, bed and bath time everyday.

OP, YANBU to feel sad for the baby. 60 hours is a long time at nursery (mine go for 24 hours a week and that feels about right for us). But if you are providing good care for the baby and it sounds like you are, then things will be OK, no reason for the baby to suffer really.
Although at 6 months both my babies were like leetches to me, wouldn't even go to anyone else, especially my DD. But babies are different.

I am an ex childminder and this makes me quite cross. So what? the mum wants a day to herself, big deal. And what about the dad?

Dozer you can be sad for the baby and understanding to the mother.

I'm sad for the kids I look after sometimes, when neither their mum or dad can make it to a play/assembley for example. I also fully understand and support why they choose to work. I can feel two emotions at the same time.

What's the etc.? What else has she said other than she feels sad for the baby?

The OP certainly IS being judgy, "sad for the baby" etc.

I don't know if I'm missing something, but I can't see how the OP is being judgey? She can feel sad for the baby whilst also being understanding towards the mother. As humans we are able to feel two emotions at the same time.

Maybe she needs her hair done/wants a bikini wax/has a ton of stuff to do?

I am a single mother who has worked full time pretty much since DS was 7 months old. You don't get time to do anything for yourself. Go to the gym, go clothes shopping, get your hair cut. All those things that you can't legitimately take time off work to do or do in the evening if you're solely responsible for childcare. So I have taken time off work AND kept DS in childcare. What a horrible mother I am

At the age of 5, my DS is doing far better than whatever you're supposed to be able to do at his age when it comes to social and emotional skills incidentally. So he doesn't appear to be fucked up by my being a full time working single parent at all. And, let's face it, if you stay at home and claim income support, you're even more vilified.

I'm off on Monday and baby is going to nursery. Because clearly I don't love her and am a bad mother.

Or I need sleep and time alone with my husband, it's paid for and I don't want to disrupt her routine.

No one knows what's going on in this woman's life, she could have all sorts to deal with.

I thought OP was going to be saying the family was going abroad for weeks on hol without baby. 1 day, Pah, tis nothing.

"The CM is providing 60 hours a week of childcare, so unless this mother works right next door to the CM, she works a 60+ hour week."

No, if she works right next door she does 60 hours max.

If she works further away she does less than that.

Not that it matters, clearly she and the baby both have a very long week.