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Original poster

Nanny taking pics

59 replies

gobblygook · 23/10/2011 15:53

I have an amazing nanny for my 11 month old DS. She's been part time with us for five months and ds loves her and I have nothing but praise - and I work at home so I am involved. her references were outstanding.

This week she got a new iPhone - she's had a dodgy phone that hasn't taken pics. Then she took some pics of DS and a video if him laughing. She showed me and sent me the video - but I feel uncomfortable about it. I don't think is about anything except her fondness for him but I'd prefer she didn't.

Equally, I'm finding it really hard to think whether a) I'm being silly b) how I approach the conversation without offending her. Shes an important part of our day to day.

Wondered what people thought? Or any suggestions for effective, sensitive handling...

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AAAvegetable · 23/10/2011 16:11

FB is a legitimate concern and I think it would be wrong if she chose to publish the pics on there. Is she on FB?

What do you mean when you say you feel a bit threatened? Are you referring to her being close to your DS and finding that threatening. That's a constant tension when you choose to have a nanny but I try to remember I chose a nanny over group childcare partly in order to ensure my DCs had close personal bonds with their primary caregiver.

hellhasnofury · 23/10/2011 16:11

If it makes you feel uncomfortable could you provide her with a small compact camera so she can take photos:video clips?

I work with children, we are not allowed to take photos on personal phones but we do have cameras provided for the purpose. I can see why she's doing it as photos provide wonderful memories. I only wish I had more photos if when my 2 were small. Time goes so quickly and each stage is so brief.

catsareevil · 23/10/2011 16:06

Have you asked her about facebook? IMO it wouldnt be right fo her to put pictures there without your agreement, but it doesnt sound like you have any reason to think that they are going on facebook?

catsareevil · 23/10/2011 16:05

What is it that bothers you about this. It sounds normal to me, and nice that she thought to send it to you.

Original poster
gobblygook · 23/10/2011 16:04

Yes, all fair comments. I'm not entirely sure - partly the idea that she has so many pics of him on his phone and also that they may appear on fB etc

But strangely, I have never felt threatened by her in any way and this makes me feel a bit threatened

And also why shed want a phone full of photos of him...

Sorry, don't have a go at me, I'm just expressing whats on my
Mind even if not entirely rational

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AAAvegetable · 23/10/2011 16:03

I find it really odd that this makes you uncomfortable. In my opinion and experience it's very normal for nannies to take pics of their charges. Our nanny has multiple photos of our kids on her phone, she even tells me shows them to her mum, so her mum can picture what she does all day. I have never thought that odd - she is with my kids all day they are a give part of her life.

What do you think she might do with the pics? If it's something dodgy then you clearly don't trust her and that has v serious implications.

nbee84 · 23/10/2011 16:03

As a nanny I take pictures and send them to my bosses so that they can see what the children are up to and that they are having fun. I have made a collage of them for bosses christmas presents in the past and when I leave a job I like to give the children a small photo album of pictures from when I started with them through to when I leave.

I would never upload them to something like facebook - is this one your concerns? It would be quite usual for a nanny to have a clause in her contract that states she is not to do this.

azazello · 23/10/2011 15:59

What exactly is your problem with it? that she is taking the pictures or you don't know whether they are being added to her fb account or something? My nanny takes pictures of the children and sends them to me. It is pretty standard and imo meant to show you what your child is up to. I don't have a problem with it.

If you really feel uncomfortable, you'll have to talk to her about it but do have a think about whether it is that you don't want her to add pictures to fb or something or just not to take them.

ASuitableGirl · 23/10/2011 15:55

I'd have thought she had sent you the video so you could see what your DS had been doing as well - to share it with you. What is it that makes you feel uncomfortable about it?