Should my au pair have her parents to stay?

My parents came to stay in my host families home for a weeks holiday when I was an aupair. My host family were very sociable and enjoyed meeting them. My mum is still in contact with my host mum 15 years later. It was certainly common among my aupair friends then (along time a go!)

I wouldn't have them to stay. My private home is not a hotel for an AP's friends and family. Although current AP had sister to stay for a week but she was younger, only 13 years old and we enjoyed having her. Adult parents / relatives should stay in a B&B or hotel although I would be happy to host a hello coffee or meal.

When I was an aupair, I only had friends/family members over when the family went away. I didn't want to put them in an uncomfortable situation and appreciated that they could stay while the family was on holiday. I suggest a local hotel or B&Q with an invitation for dinner-you don't need to host them if you don't want to!

Why would they object to anything she was being asked to do? Would they really undermine you in front of her? I am interested in why you would think there would be a risk of this. Do they phone a lot/seem otherwise interfering? Even if they are staying in a hotel, they would get wind of what she's being asked to do so I don't think it makes sense to object to them coming on that basis.

A lot depends on the set up you have. Two young people IS different from her parents coming. From my point of view, as they are presumably closer in age to you there is also more of an expectation 'in the air' that you will be involved in entertaining them. If they're staying elsewhere you can have them round for a meal and do your bit to welcome them but then distance yourself a bit from feeling obliged to make sure they're occupied/having a good time etc for the entire period.

I wouldn't offer too much in the way of detailed explanations. I would just offer a list of B&Bs/hotels nearby and say it would be more convenient if they stayed there.

Is England much more expensive than your APs home country? Our APs have been from Germany where prices are pretty similar so it's never been an issue on that front. I have had my APs mum to stay but after we'd already met them once and they're lovely.

Our Au Pair's parents came over at New Year and although they did stay at a hotel just down the road, they did spend a lot of time with us and ate most meals with us. It was really nice to meet them and they were looking forward to meeting us all. Our au pair has now left but we keep in touch with them all and they have invited us to go and stay with them next year.

It all depends what you feel comfortable with.

Did best friend and brother come together? 2 people is entirely different to 1. Plus young people usually have leas disposable income. Presumably her parents can afford the B&B so they don't impose?

It would be different if you weren't there but it would probably be crowded with you around.

Well if you don't want to, you dont' have to! Why can't they find a local B&B to stay in???

Having young people in the home does seem very different to having older people in the home. It would almost feel like a teenage sleepover if it was the au pair and a friend. But her parents? completely different feel to it.

Can't help you with what is the norm. I guess it would depend on how long she is working for you.