Yup, Boff's got through another nanny ...

'heave herself to her full 5ft 7in'

boffy is NOT a snotty cow!!!!!

"joining the sofa surfing classes is however still an option"

you can stop being such a snotty cow for a start! No wonder the mums at school (many of whom probably have degrees etc) shun you and why you don't get ahead in your career due to your lack of inter-personal skills.

And maybe your DS would enjoy you spending a bit of time with him before he starts school.

strange nanny woman.. 13 is a great age.. vulnerable but trying to be grown up..

sorry for you .. minefield..though I was a sahm for a while and wouldnt dream of watching jeremy kyle shite to be honest..
also i was the only mum at the school gate WITHOUT a degree.. who cares whether someone has a degree or not. not important is it really...lets face it child birth is the best leveler..

bet there are some mums there who are your cup of tea. you just havnt had time to meet them pehaps.. now you can..good luck..

With your background in education and current knowledge of higher education, have you thought about educational consultancy (e.g. Gabbitas or being a school registrar? The latter is basically a sales job for a school, so has to pay, and with the fact that some of the major markets for independent/private schools in the UK are abroad, language skills are a plus (for example, French could help in parts of regions like North Africa, where things have been unstable enough for wealthy people to be nervous about keeping their children there...).

In the meantime, here is a nanny-related dilemma to cheer you up!

(Or allow you to rant and thereby blow off steam and get rid of some of the despair and weariness which has been colouring more and more of your postings...)

That comment about the piano teaching underlines the impression that you are a person who is disciplined and multi-skilled enough to have and manage a portfolio career, so again, please don't feel that you can only solve this problem through childcare, as this could be the most difficult way of solving your problem!

Does the Open University, with its time-shifted, off-campus way of working, have anything to offer you, or is it too low-level/not sufficiently specialised?

itunes has a stack of lectures online, proving that educational content is delivered in increasingly differentiated ways.

University publishers and presses need reliable (and accredited) writers (reliable because editors absolutely HATE late and badly written or off-topic copy). Specialist publications need reliable and accredited reviewers. I ended up in the trade press six years after I graduated, and was extremely pissed off I hadn't got there sooner, as it is a more stable revenue model than mainstream or consumer media, offers possibilities to specialise, offers its own world of validation, depends very heavily on freelance and part-time/contracted work... Having known all this earlier would have saved me a lot of aggro and crappy jobs!

Sorry to derail the discussion rom childcare, but as your story shows, childcare is the hardest thing for parents (most commonly mothers - boo hiss) to manage, and you have made comments elsewhere about changing the work side of things...

thats my way of thinking as well strix

you get wrap around care and then ap can chill a bit during the day before mad run of nursery/school pick up

Boff,
I was thinking:

AP does morning shift and drops DS at nursery.

AP does late afternoon / evening shift (including nursery pick up, prepare dinner, etc.)

If no nurseies in your area with places, what about a childminder?

Could you look at a change of direction work wise... something you could do from home perhaps like marking exam work related to your field of work?
Not ideal but may help you not get too bored sitting on that sofa.

Sounds like a killer, Boff. Not sure I could continue to work for 12 hours a day for £25 a week.

I just wanted to mention that not all nannies prefer younger kids. I would prefer a younger child and a pre-teen and I'm having a lot of difficulty in finding that kind of job! Littley's are very rewarding, but older kids are entertaining and have a mind of their own!

I agree that AP and nursery would be your way forward though, either male AP or outdoorsy/nerdy girl AP!

What is wrong with Greek males??

(Laquitar is married to one )

I heard my name mentioned....

I can also recommend male AP's for many reasons. For example:-

1. They will play footie/trampoline with kids and get dirty quite happily
2. You can get graduates aged 23+ who genuinely want to play with kids and learn English, rather than school leavers who (often) just want to leave home.
3. It is easier for them to socialise and build up a network of friends
4. They are 'even-tempered' - I found girls emotions tended to swing up and down depending on whether they had/were getting on with their boyfriends
5. MY DS in particular doesn't push the boundaries with men the way he does occasionally with females
6. They are a damn sight cheaper than a nanny

Downsides

1. Have yet to find a male AP who can cook anything more complicated than an omelette
2. You have to wash your own smalls.

I get mine from aupair-world.net and insist on the following:-
a) Graduate
b) 23+
c) driving licence
d) must have lived away from home before
e) must have come from a family where mum works

Once they've filled those criteria then I skype them. I also have a bias in favour of/against certain countries though I have had success even when I've ignored that preference list (current AP is Greek, for example). IME good AP's last a year at a time and they do keep in touch (our first AP from 6 years ago was here recently). Finding them is a slog but once you are ruthless and cut out the ones that don't fit your criteria you can usually narrow it down to maybe 5-10 suitable candidates that you can then skype.

so what are you going to do boffy?

as you have a range of ages, i agree that maybe one type of childcare may not suit all your dc and a mixture of ap/cm/nursery is prob better than a nanny

and Mtorun there is nothing wrong with boffy or her dc/dh -she has just had a run of bad luck with nutty nannies from the place we dont name

Strix - 19 May 22:22 where I wrote about how they were advertising for evening babysitting and "nanny hasn't logged in since January".

BoffinMum - cost wise having someone live-in I expect will be the lower cost option but finding someone happy to care for children in the large age range may be tricky. Your 13 year old probably doesn't need much care, just someone around to help him out on occasion with homework, computer game, or driving him to/from activities. Mind you, probably the same applies for your 10 year old. Maybe aupair + nursery is something to consider, least for school term time.

Just reading all this (and ignoring Mtorun)...

My chum (lawyer) had male au pairs from when her son was about 5 or 6. The first one (from Latvia) stayed for 3 years (and still comes back visiting on hols to England now). Second one (also E European) stayed for nearly same length of time.

My chum says one of the things that was good for both her and her son about these guys was that were a little bit older (eg early 20s) and had done their military service. So the son was impressed by tales of flying in planes etc and they were good (enough) at getting up on time, tidying up etc as they already had some practice :)

Could you poss look at a male au pair/manny who might suit your DS and maybe afford to send younger DCs to nursery or somesuch as au pair would be cheaper. Au pair could do pick ups and drop offs.

This is just a thought, may be completely unviable for various reasons. As another poster said, also depends if MrBoffin will go for a young man in the house.

I think Nick also mentioned that she hadn't actually logged in since January. I have a profile on there and have a job that I am not looking to leave. Some have theirs on there as they do ad hoc weekend work or babysitting. Mine is still on there as I haven't worked out how to delete it

Nick, by being on childcare.co.uk I assumed she was looking for work in the uk, and therefore not really seeking to relocate to Turkey. Although I'm not all that familiar with the site so perhaps I assumed wrongly.