Reasonable requests?

why have you put up with this for 2 years?

YABU to withhold her wages, dont think this is legal

obv you need to be able to get hold of your nanny, does she ever answer the home phone, or is she out all day with no mobile as you said she doesnt go out much - so surely you can get her at home iyswim?

but seems weird she does this once a week, is it the same day each week?

what do you think she is doing?

possibly another nanny job, as one mb found out on here a few years ago after following her

can you ask your dd what she has done that day, tho at 2, you may not get much of an answer

how do you know she doesnt wash her hands, after the toilet? are you in there with her?

i think you need to give notice and find a new nanny

Just realised she's been with you 2 years - you'd have to go down the discliplinary route to get rid of her (or encourage her to leave). The lead away from the TV is a good idea. Maybe book her into a couple of classes (gymboree type things) that will get her out of the house.

She doesn't sound great - get someone else!
Its not legal to withold pay - you're only allowed to may deductions from pay for reasons listed on her contract.

YANBU she should be contactable, YABU to have a financial sanction. Verbally warn her, if she does it again then issue a written warning.

The not washing hands is icky and endangering your DD. Not sure how you can deal with this tactfully though! You could warn her about this too I suppose...

Activities-wise she should be doing more but that, compared to the other things is minor. Talk to her about it but even if she improved there and didn't on the other things I'd still be looking at letting her go.

I think you should look for someone else... In my contract with my nanny, I explicitly state that their phone must be usable during working hours (I pay her a phone allowance). "Repeated failure to be contactable by mobile phone during working hours (eg by not turning your phone on)" is listed as a disciplinable Misconduct. I do need to contact them sometimes urgently, like ballet classes being cancelled or my DC need to be collected from school, so I think it is entirely reasonable of you.

Talk to her about the phone, TV and about doing activities properly, follow your disciplinary procedure. Hopefully she will get it.

Agree with nbee84. You can't withdraw a day's pay. If you do not want to get rid of this lady, have you considered supplying her with a small pay as you go phone that you will charge up etc?
Also, why not take away the lead from the TV so she does not watch it when in charge of you DD.
But quite frankly, if you have to do that sort of stuff, I'd look elsewhere.

yanbu. she should be contactable and anyway have her phone on her at all times in case of emergencies( i a cm and I do) she sounds a tad lazy and a bit childish..amazed that she is 52!!!

look around, better out there me thinks

And as for the hand washing - yuk! Difficult though. May be you can talk to her about the importance of hygiene for your little one and that you want to make sure that she is in the routine of washing hands before she eats/after she's been to the park etc - and hope that she takes the hint about her own hygiene.

Totally unreasonable to withhold a days pay - not sure it is even legal.

But YANBU over your concerns. It doesn't sound like she is the right nanny for you. I wouldn't be happy with a nanny that didn't like to get out & about. A certain amount of homebased play is a good thing - but doing puzzles and colouring while the 2 year old watches Definitely not unreasonable to want the nanny to be contactable during the day - sometimes you may have a phone on silent (ie whilst at an activity or the library) and sometimes you might not hear it if you are somewhere noisy (ie soft play) but otherwise they should be able to hear/take a phone call.

meant YANBU. doh!

YABU. At the end of the day, you are paying her and you requests are not unreasonable.
Are you really desperate to keep her?