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Original poster

Not heard from new nanny!

60 replies

Gangle · 13/11/2010 21:02

We recently hired a new nanny to look after DSs, 2.8 and 8 months when I go back to work in December. We've been out of the country for the last few months, due back at the end of the month, and so used an agency to help find a good candidate, mainly because we are looking for a French speaker and we didn't have much success with ads on Gumtree etc and being out of the country made it harder to meet people. The agency found someone who seemed great so we spoke on the phone several times, Skyped, had a close friend meet her in London and after much thought decided to offer her the position so that we had someone lined up rather than leave it until we arrive back in the UK as that would give only 2 weeks before I go back to work. It now seems that neither us or the agency have heard from her for the last 10 days. We've emailed and phoned/left messages but no response and her mobile no longer seems to be working. Of course, she could just be on holiday but it just seems strange for her to completely drop off the radar! If we don't hear soon, i.e. by next week, then I'm thinking that I really need to look for someone else asap but what if she then resurfaces? We also paid the agency a HUGE fee for this candidate which had to be paid within 7 days of her accepting the job despite me telling the agency that I was concerned that something like this may happen. They will replace her but still! Am I panicking unnecessarily??

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Original poster
Gangle · 14/11/2010 16:47

Yes, two others I thought good, but we are now back in just over 2 weeks so think I would wait and interview in person now. Really don't want to get a temp, too disruptive for the children.

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nannynick · 14/11/2010 16:46

I'm a great believe in Gut Instinct. However for your subconscious mind to get a good picture, I feel you do need to meet in person.

The first few months (rather than weeks) will be when you get to know the person more.

Has she actually formally accepted the job?

frakkinup · 14/11/2010 16:44

Get onto the agency and tell them you want a temp if she doesn't turn up until they find you a new candidate or you find alternative childcare. They should be preparing CVs etc now.

Did you interview anyone else who was a strong possibility?

Original poster
Gangle · 14/11/2010 16:41

Weird though - do you think she has actually changed her number to avoid me/the agency?? Wouldn't you just tell us straight up that you've found another job? At least we'd all know where we stood.

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Original poster
Gangle · 14/11/2010 16:40

I don't think you can ever really tell what someone is like until they've been in the job a few weeks. You certainly can't glean much for a couple of interviews. Think you just have to go with your instinct and give them a trial period and see how they work out which is what we were going to do. I did um and ahh about whether to offer her the job but felt I had to or she would go elsewhere which is fair enough. In terms of timing, how long do you think we should "hold" the job for her? I was thinking that if I don't hear back by Monday or Tuesday then I am going to have to arrange childcare for December at least, probably with their old nanny before she gets booked up. What if she then resurfaces?

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frakkinup · 14/11/2010 16:34

I've done it. More than once in fact. Does that make me mad?

Sometimes it's not possible to meet the family. It's actually quite often the case with temp jobs with people coming from abroad/you going to them. For a permanent job it's more difficult to gauge and I wouldn't do it without an agency. The one time it did go wrong (perm job) the agency got me out very neatly.

Parents/children aren't always the way they come across at interview when you're actually in a job so even an in-person meeting isn't foolproof. Someone who takes a long time over the phone to go into detail is better IMO than an hour's meeting.

Anyway, the OP effectively has no choice so she's done the sensible thing - agency, in depth phone interview, meeting with someone trusted, probationary period.

Blondeshavemorefun · 14/11/2010 16:25

whoops, meant to add

but least gangles close friend has met the nanny, and made sure she is who she says she is and hopefully checked crb/written refs etc

Blondeshavemorefun · 14/11/2010 16:23

personally i would NEVER take on any job where i hadnt met the parents or the children

you can train the children, but not the parents Grin

tho some friends have accepted jobs and hadnt met the children totally mad imho

RumourOfAHurricane · 14/11/2010 16:19

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StarExpat · 14/11/2010 16:14

Don't worry about Shineoncrazydiamond's post. You've skyped, talked...etc. Not much more you can get from a few short interviews in person anyway. And I'm sure you'll be sensibly having a settling in period to make sure it's a good fit.

nannynick · 14/11/2010 16:13

"had a close friend meet her in London"

So a close friend of Gangle has met the nanny in person and reported back to Gangle about how that meeting went, what was discussed etc.

However as a nanny I don't think I would commit to a job without meeting the family and children. So maybe nanny is having second thoughts about it... but if that was the case they would reply to e-mail surely.

Sounds more likely they have gone away, perhaps abroad.

Blondeshavemorefun · 14/11/2010 15:53

does seem a bit strange you havnt heard from her and tbh does sound as if she doesnt want the job

im very surprised the agency havnt chased her up, then again they have their money

yes she could be on holiday, and when im away i dont check email or return calls as gets stung by roaming

i would also be very wary of employing someone you havnt met, tho obviously you have been out of the country so harder to meet

i would start the ball rolling again by looking, you havnt got anything to lose by doing so

Original poster
Gangle · 14/11/2010 14:57

Thanks all. I hope she is just on holiday but it seems strange that her phone isn't working. Will give her another week and just hope she gets in touch but will ask the agency to start sending through other CVs just in case. I do have contact details of a former employer who I could ask but don't want to do so just yet as seems a bit early. Think the agency has written to her home address. From what I can tell the agency are also starting to get a bit worried!

Shineoncrazy, I don't think interviewing someone over the phone makes me a bad judge of character??? We didn't have many choices anyway as we're out of the country and I didn't want to arrive back and due be back at work in 2 weeks with noone lined up. She will of course have a probationary period and the agency would replace her if either side not happy.

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euracantha · 14/11/2010 12:34

I take it that the agency you got your nanny from have the nannys address ,Considering what parents pay these agencies you should ask them to write to her home address,I take it they wont give you it? telling her that if you havent heard from her within a certain time period you will remove the job offer,If she is on holiday this gives her another week or so to get back to you.If it was me I would ask the agency for other applicants now just in case you dont hear from her.I do hope she`s alright though.

Hardandsleazy · 14/11/2010 12:26

Am with harriet- employed my current nanny when she was out of country and her phone was off/didn't check email often. Tbh if she is due to start end of month or early november this seems Like a logical time to go away. Hope it all gets sorted

RumourOfAHurricane · 14/11/2010 09:11

This reply has been deleted

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HarrietTheSpook · 14/11/2010 09:05

Has the agency actually said to you that they think something might be wrong? Or are they pretty relaxed about it?

HarrietTheSpook · 14/11/2010 09:04

I don't think ten days is actually that long. She is probably just on holiday. Lots of people don't appreciate getting roaming charges on their mobile if they're out of the UK for one thing, and also if YOU are abroad too she probably figures there's not much that can happen in terms of 'getting ready' for her job - or couldn't wait -until she gets back.

I can understand why you're feeling nervous, not having met her 'in person' but try not to panic.

happychappy · 14/11/2010 08:24

I think I saw your ad on Guntree. I wanted to apply but I'm an Italian speaker not French.

I hope all goes well

frakkinup · 14/11/2010 05:33

I agree she might have gone on holiday and not taken her phone. I switch my english phone off when abroad.

Surely the agency have some form of emergency contact for her? I've been asked for next of kin details before. Or like others have said a previous employer? A nanny that knows her?

ChippingIn · 13/11/2010 22:50

She may have gone somewhere quite remote for a big trip before starting her new job - there's still two weeks (at least) before she starts.

There's no harm in starting to look, just in case - but you can't go giving her job to someone else unless she doesn't turn up/phone when you agreed she would.

You don't employ her yet - she's not obliged to be contactable during this time.

MoonUnitAlpha · 13/11/2010 22:38

Maybe she's just gone on holiday before starting her new job?

StarExpat · 13/11/2010 21:39

Oh goodness that makes it even more of a worry!!

I think someone from the nanny agency should do something else to contact her (go to her home or ring current employer to see if they have seen her recently)... Something. Just to be sure she's taking the piss and not something awful :(

Original poster
Gangle · 13/11/2010 21:34

I will do StarExpat. Is worrying and very surprising as I think that I am usually a good judge of character.

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StarExpat · 13/11/2010 21:27

Let us know on this thread if you or agency hear from her. Sorry Blush I really do worry about people in situations like this.
If she is just avoiding you, then shame on her! And no, She's not the nanny you thought she was.
Does the agency know where she currently works and can check on her there?
The worst case scenario always goes through my mind! Imagine if something has happened and no one has followed up!