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Baby names

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Need help with childs surname - unmarried parents.

28 replies

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 11/04/2010 16:03

The issue is:

My surname is deeply unusual - if you were to google it I would come near the top of the first page - it is also one of those names that is always spelt wrong (even when you spell it for people), and that people totally struggle to pronounce (even when told) - would rather not burden child with this.

My partners name is very common - think "Smith"

If we use Smith as a surname, I will constantly be called Mrs Smith (as parent of child Smith)

I have read lots of stories about mothers being questioned at immigration as their surname is different to their child's surname.

I'm sort of attached to my surname and sort of don't want the line to die out .

What would be the best way to incorporate both of our surnames in such a way that usually (e.g. school register, bank cards) my child will be known as Child Smith, but my name is in there somewhere.

Middle name? (it doesn't sound like a forename at all)

Non-hyphenated double barreled surname eg Smith Myname ( I read somewhere that the convention with this would be to drop the second name except on formal stuff?)

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
PotPourri · 11/04/2010 16:59

dle name, then it can carry on through generations rather than drop off...

JaynieB · 11/04/2010 16:56

Same as twosofar - DD has Dads name not mine and its been no problem. I also have a friend that has a 'family name' as a middle name which you wouldn't have used as a first name either.

twosofar · 11/04/2010 16:52

My DP and I are not married and have 2 DS's. Both have DP's surname. Not once have I ever been referred to as Mrs DP, nor have I ever been questioned at immigration. There are millions of mothers who have a different name from their DC's so I really wouldn't let that worry you.

However if you really want to incorporate your surname for reasons of posterity then I would definitely use it as a middle name. I have two friends who have done this...the names don't sound like forenames at all either but they only see the light of day on passports etc so it's really not an issue.

Not convinced about double barrelling...personally i think it's a bit naff (unless you are aristocracy with a real double barrelled number that's been knocking about since Henry VIII)

Just my humble opinion of course x