Is it OK to use my sister's new stepson's name?

I'd call my son Alexander (especially as this is a name I love!) despite sister's step son being called the same. It's not a sign of disrespect to either your son or his cousin. It's a sign you like the name, that's all.

Come on - think of all those families who have "family names" and everyone is called John!

it sounds as if your sister doesn't want you to call your son the same name as her stepson. so either you need to be considerate to her feelings or you say i don't give a toss and i'm doing what i want anyway. personally i would choose a different name

I'd say it's fine to name your son Alexander. You can explain to your nephew that you've always liked the name and he's lucky to have such a lovely name.

My partner's cousin has just had a son and has named him the same as our son (6m older). She also has a daughter with a similar name to me (she's a Rose and I'm a Rosie). My partner's mum has made a comment about it, but I think a) it's funny and b) it's nice that they like our names and c) they'll hardly ever see each other so it doesn't matter anyway.

She's just acquired a stepson and lives on the other side of the world?

It's not as if she's given birth herself to this Alexander and lives on the next street is it?

no

Your baby, you name him the name you love ! am sure your step-nephew would be flattered !

I don't think it's a big deal as they might never meet.

I love Alexander, I say go for it!

I wouldn't, for all the reasons stated above.

I would name your baby what you want to name them. I am sure the children will not be at all bothered. If any relatives say anything I would just say 'Oh we've loved this name for ages and isn't it nice that now we have two in the family!'

All children are special, the fact they are related by marriage is not really relevant at all. If as a single person you met a bloke you loved and his sister had the same first name as you and he asked you to marry him I doubt you'd say I can't marry someone whose sister has the same name as me!

My only suggestion would be please DON'T go and give it a weird spelling to make it sound different. because it won't sound different it will look different!

No I really wouldn't, I think Patsy99 makes some very good points.

I know it's hard to find names you really like but I would look again for another name.

my daughter is called B, when she was 3 my brother met a girl who he then married who had a daughter (same age) called.... B..... we've "adjusted" both girls names so one is B and one is b (IYSWIM) and its been absolutely fine - i didnt think anything of it other than how confusing it would be when everyone was at the GPs for the day......

If he became stepson next year you wouldn't even worry about it. Name your baby what you want. If your sister and partner split up and she loses touch with stepson you'll kick yourself.

Another definate NO vote for the reasons mentioned already.

There are so many names out there, why choose one that has already been given to my sister's step-son. Honestly, I wouldn't.

I was going to say that you should use it.

Then I thought of my own family.

My brother is married to a woman who has a child, J.

If I were to call my child the same name as my brother's stepson, it would be odd.

Not least because my parents see J as a grandson, so to have 2 grandchildren with the same name would be strange.

I would never name my child the same as my BIL's son. It would be very odd.

I'd had this discussion before on mn, so not really going to bother going the full 9 yards again, but all things being equal, I'd rather that my stepson and my nephew had a name each and did not share one. It's simpler, avoids possibly risking upsetting the stepson, or the baby being known as little Alex(eg).

Also, it might not be confusing for the OP herself, but supposing the two sisters have mutual friends, aunts, cousins, then both of the 'smith girls' have an Alex. Which Alex is the one that needs a get well card? I met their mum yesterday and she said Alex is sick. Hmmmm.

It wouldn't be the end of the World if it was a times a little confusing or if one child was known as little [Name] but there are plenty of names out there!

Funny how adults are so possessive of names but I don't think kids are- don't remember any of the 5 Johns and 3 Davids in my class at school much caring that they shared names. Also, at the last large family meetup I got actively doorstopped by two separate cousins daughters plugging that I reuse their names when I have a baby (they are 15/16).

I think your new step-nephew will likely be flattered and not at all concerned if you call your son Alexander. Might be different if he was

Why does it matter if the sister has a son and a nephew called Alexander? Why would that bother somebody? If they spent a lot of time together then it would be confusing, but otherwise so what?

It might be a bit odd for your sister. She'll have a nephew and a stepson with the same name. That might be slightly more problematic for her than it is for you.

I would avoid it, personally, as I dislike duplicating family names however tenuous the link may seem. Alec is a lovely alternative. Equally, you could relegate Alexander to the middle name and then it needn't be an issue at all.

Don't think anyone would be bothered by using the same name. I think it would only be an issue if she had chosen the name for a future child and you got there first (think episode of friends when Rachael chooses the name Emma for her little girl). My great-grandmother and her sister were both called Sarah. Apparently Great-great-grandmother really liked the name!

I wouldn't myself, suggests you're not really welcoming the new stepson as part of your family... and if your parents are still alive they'll have a granchild and step-grandchild by the same name. Assuming your sis has a good relationship with her Alexander, she might be a bit hurt that you've repeated the name.

Nice name though!!