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Baby names

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Caused family upset by boys name choice - Help pls!!

85 replies

FeedTheBeast · 26/02/2010 15:02

After much consideration we had decided on Jesse as the name if baby is a boy. I had suggested lots to DH & Jesse is the only one he really likes apart from Zac, which sounds like a sneeze when said with our surname Asher.

Asher is a old Hebrew name, one of the tribes of Israel and means to be happy / blessed. Isaac means to laugh which would give the name a lovely meaning but doesn't flow well - Isaac Asher / Zach Asher. (Also it is quite popular in our area)

Jesse is fab, old biblical name, cool snowboarder / surfer type guys spring to mind, and I also associate it with a kind wise old man character. It is a 'proper' name but uncommonly used, however we are in the North and it does have the slightly negative connotation of someone being a 'mummy's boy', which DH thinks is irrelevant & he said he would be happy if Jesse was his name.

The problem lies with my parents - my father is 70, & my mum has told my sister that he keeps having some sort of terrible funny turn / peculiar episode whenever he thinks of it, (he's recovering from a major op. too so feeling guilty of causing him distress) They both dislike it(understatement), & my mum keeps referring to a mummys boy character called Jesse in a soap she watches?? The rest of the family diapprove too but less bothered about them TBH (not keen on the names they picked for their LO's)

So my question is:
1)do we stick with it & everyone will get used to it? (& deal with the guilt if he's picked on later?)

2)Try & think of an alternative (any ideas??)

  1. Bury head in sand & hope the bump is pink so we don't have the problem
OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
chipmonkey · 27/02/2010 01:04

where have you been?

doubleexpresso · 26/02/2010 22:22

I can see what you mean about it being a good male name with positive associations ... but, to me, it just sounds like a girl's name... Sorry.

stleger · 26/02/2010 21:31

In Cork we like men to be called Jeremiah and Cornelius. Cornelius Asher would be good! (Ignore other people is the best advice)

FeedTheBeast · 26/02/2010 21:20

thank you I really appreciate all of the replies and the honesty.

seashore DH is Thomas would possibly be MN
chipmonkey would be very proud if my boy turned out like jesse metcalfe! however his dad's yorkshire ginger genes may win through...

OP posts:
DorotheaPlenticlew · 26/02/2010 19:52

Am in Edinburgh and I know someone with a little boy called Jesse. He started school recently (this year or last, can't recall) and no problems have been mentioned.

I did wonder when I first heard it if people locally would think of it as the insult "jessie", but nobody seems to. Their other child also has a gender-neutral sort of name, so they don't seem to have regretted their choice! Personally I reckon the name is fine, any connotations it may have had of being wimpish or whatever are fast disappearing into the past and now the associations are pretty cool and positive.

Anyway, sod what other people think

Angeliz · 26/02/2010 19:38

My Husband is Irish, i loved the name Jessie for a boy but my Husband was having none of it, like MmeLindt, he said he'd get 'ya big Jessie'

Personaly it's one of my favourite boys names.

chipmonkey · 26/02/2010 19:36

sorry and er Jesse Metcalfe, hardly a big jessie!

chipmonkey · 26/02/2010 19:34

at dizietsma!

and er [http://www.serbia.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/10/jesse-metcalfe-20070329-232917.jpg Jesse Metcalfe, hardly a big jessie!]]

I think your Mum is coming on a bit strong with the emotional blackmail and it's not fair of her.

I know a Jesse and AFAIK, he has never been teased about his name. And he's in Cork, hwere they like men to be men!

seashore · 26/02/2010 19:29

ok, I completely say stick with your own choice! But I've been reading bits of this aloud to dh while he makes dinner, and he says J.A doesn't work, his opinion is that a more earthy name will sit better with Asher, he likes Tomas Asher, (which would also be totally giving in to the older generation). he also suggests Jerome Asher? The letter J works with it, but Jesse? It's the ss's in both names don't work. Jerone? I think that's nice, it's english meaning hopeful.

CletusTheSlackJawedYokel · 26/02/2010 19:18

Yeah, stick with Jesse and just change Asher

Gracie123 · 26/02/2010 19:17

I live on the border of yorkshire/cumbria and people here have a very strong sense of 'right' and 'wrong' according to how children (boys particularly) are brought up. One guy at work wouldn't allow his wife to work in the last few weeks of pregnancy because she worked in cumbria and he wanted to make sure their baby was a 'proper yorkshire lad' - couldn't possibly risk her going into labour across the border!!!
That said, I don't think I have EVER heard anyone use the term Jesse to mean 'mummies boy' and we live in a boarding school where all sorts of teasing happens. It was definitely something that was limited to our parents generation in this area.
We had a lot of trouble choosing DS name because Dh's family insisted that we should use their family name (we didn't). They were very vocal about it before the birth, and tried to pull all the guilt trips about granny not having long left/would mean so much to grandpa (deceased) but once he was born and we announced the name everyone got over it.
There was a suggestion from MiL that we should take a family name for second child, but we simply announced that we had already chosen another name and that seems to have settled it.

thisisyesterday · 26/02/2010 19:13

STICK WITH IT!

Jesse is a really lovely name, and if you like it that is what matters. don't let other poeople sway you or you'll really regret it!

glinda · 26/02/2010 19:12

Def. a generational thing. My initial thoughts were "oh thats a nice name but would they get called 'a right jessie' ?"
However I have just asked my dc 14 and 11. They said it was a cool name and talked about someone called Jesse McCartney who is apparently a "fit" singer.
We are also in 't north!

AitchTwoOhOneOh · 26/02/2010 19:09

agree with heated, i think zach sounds better than jesse. jesse asher sounds like you've been drinking.

amateurmum · 26/02/2010 19:08

My ds has a child in his class called Jesse but pronounced Jess. He seems to be a popular child and I've never heard anyone comment on his name at all.

FeedTheBeast · 26/02/2010 19:04

!

OP posts:
Heated · 26/02/2010 19:04

Your parents are wrong to lay the guilt-trip which is why you just need to present them with the baby and the name together at the same time.

However, to me, Jesse Asher is a bit of a slushy mouthful, keep saying Jesshy Asser! (sorry)

Zac or Isaac with its crisper sound flows much better.

seashore · 26/02/2010 19:02

Stick with it, my folks (78, 80) have not liked my names for both dd and ds. 1st time they just said nothing which was hurtful, especially as the name was just a femine version of dh's name. Second time they got right in there and said awful things. Ds is only 8 months now, it's hard enough with a newborn without your own parents not just saying well done and great name (they could be nice and lie, but mine would never dream of that).

But, you know I think it's a generational thing, and jealously that it's your turn now. I like both Jesse and Zac, I agree that Zac asher sounds just fine.

It's you baby, by the time you've given birth to her/him, you'll have certainly earned to use the name of your choice.

mathanxiety · 26/02/2010 19:00

I don't really like the name Jesse, prefer Isaac, and I think the only way to prevent
any name sounding like a sneeze is to change your surname -- all that being said, your mum sounds like a lot of hard work. TBH, I suspect if it wasn't the baby's name she was complaining about, it would be something else. I vote for sticking with the name you and DH like just out of the principle that it's your baby.

Veritythebrave · 26/02/2010 18:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

pigleychez · 26/02/2010 18:57

My mum doesnt like our name choice for a boy either..

When I said We like Matthew for a boy her reply was, well I dont. (most put out by it)

My reply TOUGH!

She keeps suggesting alternatives but WE will name OUR baby what WE want... She had her chance with us

AitchTwoOhOneOh · 26/02/2010 18:55

it's your business, and imo the big jessie thing is a bit old-fashioned up in scotland. of course he'd be teased up here for about five mins, but so what?

fanjolina · 26/02/2010 18:51

Just go for the name you like. I didn't like the name my sister chose for my nephew (Arthur) but as soon as he was born it became his name and I like it because it is part of him.

paisleyleaf · 26/02/2010 18:45

I think you can get away with Jesse now. I like it.
But tell your mum; okay you've seen sense, your new DS will be called Wally.

GoddessInTheKitchen · 26/02/2010 18:35

don't know about all this jesse business (i'm down south) but its a nice name and if you botjh like it thats all that matters.. NO ONE and i mean NO ONE liked the name we picked for dd before she was born but funnily enough everyone now loves it