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Baby names

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Original poster

I am not going to give my baby a surname

243 replies

stewpid · 11/10/2009 09:58

DP and I have decided not to give our new baby a traditional surname. We have issues with both our families and no desire to perpetuate their names with our offspring.

We have two inspirational friends who have passed away. They're names were Elizabeth and Anne. In honour of them our DD will have their names as her surname. So her full name will be Iris Poppy Elizabeth-Anne.

I know some people will think this is stupid but we think it is beautiful and meaningful.

Has anyone here done anything like this? What do people think?

OP posts:
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mrsruffallo · 11/10/2009 10:23

Maybe thier fathers chose their first names. So, you could are still comemorating bastard men.
Silly idea, a ridiculous idea

DorotheaPlentighoul · 11/10/2009 10:22

Stewpid: no need for rudeness, you say? So is it not rude for you to have referred to all men as bastards?

And no, it's not barking to simply question the tradition of surnames passing down the male line. But that is not what you're doing. You're posting a frankly implausible tale of how you're going to challenge the "bastard men" tradition by doing something really, really daft that is bound to be, at best, annoying for your daughter.

belgo · 11/10/2009 10:22

I see your reasoning for doing this, but I do think you should make up a surname that sounds more like a surname

Bethan would be better or Elizan as someone has suggested.

What about taking a female ancestor's maiden name?

Georgimama · 11/10/2009 10:22

Then why refer to men in general, back through the generations whom you know nothing about, as bastards?

You're a troll. Your dillema may be genuine but you're still a troll because you're being inflammatory and using perjorative terms guaranteed to provoke a reaction. That's trolling.

purepurple · 11/10/2009 10:21

sorry, computer hiccups, didn't mean to post twice

notagrannyyet · 11/10/2009 10:20

How about choosing a surname from your or DP maternal line...look on census even. For some reason I'm pleased you had a daughter.

Original poster
stewpid · 11/10/2009 10:20

Oh FFS. I do not hate men. I love good men but I hate my violent father and DP hates his absent father. Elizabeth and Anne had issues with their paternity too. We are questioning the automatic, unthinking, commemoration of men in the naming process. We are not questioning all men.

OP posts:
piscesmoon · 11/10/2009 10:20

If it isn't a troll, I find it very sad and it will be a great disadvantage to the DC through life.

Georgimama · 11/10/2009 10:20

Because of her reference to "bastard men". It's a pretty fucked up attitude to have, and an even worse one to impose upon your daughter.

purepurple · 11/10/2009 10:19

It is barking to assume that every one on here will agree with you.
You are spoiling for a fight.
The grass is always greener.

Dogchewsonlimbsanpumpkins · 11/10/2009 10:19

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

scroobiuspirate · 11/10/2009 10:18

lots of people have issues with their parents, families.

With this in mind I would think of a nice new surname for everyone. She will spend her whole life explaining otherwise.

There must be so many lovely names you could have as a family? A name from nature, a name from a place that has meaning, a book author's surname, i dunno, ANYTHING cept more female names.

The idea itself is fine. The names chosen are not fair on your dd.

Georgimama · 11/10/2009 10:18

You're the one being rude about 51% of the population, stewpid. I'm not surprised your "dear" step son thinks your plan stupid - you've just told him in effect that you think he is a bastard. I'm surprised he only told you it was stupid.

How would you feel if a man told you he thought all women are cunts? Nice eh?

purepurple · 11/10/2009 10:17

It is barking to come on here and think that everyone will agree with you.
You must have known that lots of people will think that you are not of a sane mind.
You are just spoiling for a fight.
The grass is always greener.

Original poster
stewpid · 11/10/2009 10:16

LowLevel - of course their are women in a baby's ancestry, but they are not commemorated in surnames as surnames are passed down the male line.

OP posts:
pippel · 11/10/2009 10:16

I know people who have changed their names for family reasons, its not that unusual

but using first names would be confusing for other people so I would probably use their second names instead, so Smith-Jones or whatever.

Georgimama · 11/10/2009 10:16

Well I did think that but I didn't want to assume. So, assuming the OP is a man hating lesbian (not that all lesbians hate men obviously but this one seems to) my second question stands - what are you going to do if you have a son? Leave him outside to die like the Amazons?

Freak.

Original poster
stewpid · 11/10/2009 10:15

OK. There is no need for those of you who dislike the idea to be quite so rude. Why is it so "barking" to question why we all commemorate generations of men, who may or may not be worthy of commemoration, without a thought. We think the logic of traditional family names is questionable, and in our particular families, offensive. Is that really barking?

OP posts:
SanctimoniousTeeTotalPrig · 11/10/2009 10:14

"bastard men"

Well aren't you charming?

What about Folderol as a surname? Nice rhythm to it, you know trip, trap, trip, trap.

purepurple · 11/10/2009 10:14

I get the impression that the DP is not a bastard man.

VineGruesomeTits · 11/10/2009 10:13

Oh ffs, cant deal with trolls and a hangover too, jog on

Did all of your school reports have 'must try harder' comments on?

Georgimama · 11/10/2009 10:13

So is your partner a "bastard man"? What if you have a son - will he be a "bastard man" too? How very strange you are.

Your daughter will curse you for all the administrative reasons listed above and just call herself by one of your surnames when she is old enough, I can guarantee it.

LowLevelWhingeing · 11/10/2009 10:12

So there were no women in their ancestry, just bastard men?

riiiiiiight

allaboutme · 11/10/2009 10:12

Why dont you give her Elizabeth as a middle name and just 'Anne' as the surname then?
It will commenmorate both women without mentioning the 'bastard men' and will be a lot simpler for her to explain that 'Anne' is her surname. It may still be unusual and sound like a first name but at least will be easier to understand than having 2 first names as a surname perhaps?

VineGruesomeTits · 11/10/2009 10:11

But Elizabeth-Anne is not a surname, she will spend her whole life trying to explain that

Nice thought, but not very practical, why cant you use those names as middle names, then choose as Surname that you can all use