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Baby names

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Jade - why nobody compliments our baby's name

35 replies

Valentina15 · 03/07/2009 22:23

Our gorgeous sweet girl is called Jade - we have always loved this name and once we found out we were going to have a girl we decided to call her Jade - we think its a sweet but cool name. Since she has been born (16 months ago), I can count on one hand the times that people said 'what a lovely name'.
While what people thinks about it doesn't concern me too much, I am worried that my little girl will not be happy with her name...I hope to help her be confident enough not to care, but self esteem is somehow scarce when you are a teenager....any thoughts on whether this name is really not liked or is it just my paranoia???

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squeaver · 06/07/2009 17:46

I just don't think people comment on babies' names. I don't. I say "ooh look at all that hair" or "what lovely eyes" or "isn't he big/long/sturdy etc etc" or "she looks like you" or some other form of idle comment to acknowledge that there is, in fact, a baby there. But that's it. Sorry.

TiggyR · 06/07/2009 17:41

Ithink there are several reasons:

The Jade Goody reference has given the name a definite pigeonhole, for want of a better word. Not everyone identifies with her. Names are deeply personal and people need to identify with a name to really like like it. If they associate it with someone for whom they have no affinity (or a social group they do not relate to) it will alienate them. We all know names that we consider to be too posh, too downmarket, too boring, too trendy, too pretentious, etc. Whatever you chose it would enevitably fall into one of those categories for most people!

Jade is not a particularly unusual name and hasn't been, really, for 15 years or so. People have just got used to hearing it.

People only tend to say 'Ooh, what a beautiful name!' if it's something very unusual that they have never/rarely heard, and that immediately strikes them as lovely -assuming they don't hate it of course! Most new or unusual names take a bit of getting used to until they become sufficiently popular that we are no longer alienated by them.

I hate it when I'm told a baby's name because I am difficult to please and rarely impressed. I feel bad saying nothing, because it's kind of expected, and new parents are always thrilled with their own choice, but I'd be insincere if I waxed lyrical for the 99th time over Amelia or Luke.

I was a momentarily stumped for words when I recently met a baby girl called Kenyon though...... Apart from anything else everyone will assume it's Kenyan, like Libyan or Syrian. Bizarre. Still, horses for courses as they say.

skihorse · 06/07/2009 15:01

That's the point though isn't it mumsiebumsie? No matter how beautiful your name might be - did your mother exist solely for compliments upon it? Somehow I doubt it.

mumsiebumsie · 06/07/2009 14:50

skihorse - yes people comment on my name all the time! But that wouldn't influence my decision to name my child - if me and my DH like it, that's good enough.

skihorse · 06/07/2009 13:09

Do people generally comment upon one's name? "oh hellurrr... what a lovely name you have"?

TEJQ · 06/07/2009 12:37

I've worked for social services for 10 years caring for kids who are 'in need' or 'at risk' from socially deprived areas, and its in that capacity I have come across it a few times, along with names like Chantelle, Chanel, Tyson etc

idunnop · 06/07/2009 12:34

I think Jade is a lovely name, and it would have been one of my top choices except for the Jade Goody association. Having said that, I think that will fade very quickly and certainly won't be the perception by the time your DD is old enough to be aware of it. I think it is a very "natural" and pretty name, similar to all the flower names that are so popular at the moment.

gladders · 06/07/2009 12:27

jade is very sweet - kids of her generation won't know jade goody so she'll be fine.

my daughter is called harriet - am pretty sure we didn't get lots of compliments on that one either but we don't care because we love it!

MamaLazarou · 06/07/2009 10:45

If you love the name, why do you need to receive compliments from people?

Pingpong · 06/07/2009 10:30

TEJQ - very much depends where you live. I've never met anyone called Jade or heard it screamed when out and about. Jade Goody and Jade Jagger are the only slebs with that name that I 'know'.
I still like it Valentina15

TEJQ · 06/07/2009 08:29

I like Jade as a name, but I do know many people consider it to be a chavvy name they associate with school-girl, smoking mums on the bus or in town yelling 'J-AAAAAAAAA-YY-DDDD-E' at the top of their voices at a toddler scuttling on ahead.

bronze · 05/07/2009 12:25

Buy her a few small pieces of Jade so she grows up with them in her mind and not Goody etc

Firawla · 05/07/2009 12:22

Just because they didn't say anything doesn't mean they don't like it. I think its a pretty name

Valentina15 · 04/07/2009 22:07

Thank you for all your lovely messages!
Yes, Valentina is my name, thanks weepootle, people actually really like it - I have always secretly hated it while I was in Italy (my country of origin) but since I have been here, everybody seems to like it so much that it made me think twice.

Smac, I think Amber and Kerry are lovely names and like StealthPolarBear have said, when you meet someone with the name and you like them, the name grows on you. I think the person makes the name, rather than viceversa.

I never used to comment on baby's names either and I don't expect anything, but since I have had her and people have asked me her name, I also hate the silence that sometimes follows, like Jumente said!

Really thanks to everybody for their lovely comments, I feel better about the fact that once she is older she will like her name as much as we do. For us she is the prettiest and sweetest little girl in the world, so that's what matters!

OP posts:
crokky · 04/07/2009 18:10

I love the name Jade. I wanted to have it as DD's middle name but DH was not keen.

I think it is not so popular at the moment because of Jade Goody - she had really bad press for so long (totally undeserved IMO, I voted for her when she was originally in BB ). But lots of people have those connotations but in time, they'll totally vanish - especially by the time she is a teenager, lots of people will probably be calling their babies Jade. Don't worry about it, I love it (and I am quite fussy with baby names!).

MrsMattie · 04/07/2009 18:02

Jade is a lovely name. And don't worry about what other people think/say. You might not like their choices, either.

letsgostrawberrypicking · 04/07/2009 18:01

Us too Jumente - the best one I can remember is (after a silence) "Oh well it's one he can grow into" still not quite sure what she meant!!

And Jade is a lovely name

jellybeans · 04/07/2009 17:44

It's a lovely name. Few people say they like DSs name either but we like it, that's the main thing!

Jumente · 04/07/2009 13:48

Oh it's better than an uncomfortable silence. We had a lot of those with ds2! People just went '...Oh....[silence]...well he'll just be called '[shortened version of name which is more acceptable] though won't he, so that's Ok'

I think I really blew it for the poor little guy.

piscesmoon · 04/07/2009 13:45

I don't comment on names unless I really love them-if people have already chosen them it would be rude of me to give my true opinion.

AnnieLobeseder · 04/07/2009 13:39

How strange. I never comment on other people's children's names, and would likewise never expect comments on what I've named mine.

I think you're being a bit sensitive. It's just not something that is usually commented on. Tastes in names vary hugely, so you really can't expect everyone else to think Jade is as lovely a name as you do. If they did, every baby girl out there would be called Jade!!

StealthPolarBear · 04/07/2009 12:52

I used to love the name Jade, but went off it a bit when JG was in Big Brother. OTOH if I knew a little girl called Jade I bet it would grow on me again.
In a few years it will be back to being a short and sweet name IMO

Pingpong · 04/07/2009 12:50

I like the name Jade. I also like Amber but on here people keep saying Amber is a porn star name and Jade makes them think of Jade Goody. I also like Kerry but people make the connection with Kerry Katona too.
I wouldn't worry about it. I think you have chosen a lovely name

EyeballsandherSunburntNorks · 04/07/2009 09:21

I really like the name Jade. I wouldn't let the Jade Goody thing worry me either. She was a bit of a love or hate figure but she wasn't Hitler so can't see why it would be an issue.

weepootle · 04/07/2009 09:12

I take it your name is Valentina? It's a lovely name .

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