Would you break the chain?

We have 2 boys each with a 'chosen' first name and ds1 has his godfathers name and my dads name as middle names and ds2 has dhs name then his godfathers name. It sounded a bit mad when dh insisted it was tradition in his family that the middle name was after the godfather but I think it's quite sweet now and creates a lovely bond between the boys and their godfathers.

ps I meant to add I do actually really like both names anyway.

have three names! my husband's family all do. he shares a second and third name with his dad - second name being an ancient familial name like yours that goes back centuries and is one of king arthur's knights, so not one you'd choose!!! - third name is his grandmother's maiden name. granddad leant on us heavily to use the arthurian name should baby be a boy - luckily it was a girl and we were more than happy to use the third name to keep a familial link and still got to use the two names we liked best. i used to think three names was ostentatious but i kinda like it now, especially now i know the history behind it.

I would only use it if you love the name.
I definately would not use any name just because it is a tradition.
Personally I find the whole scene of using the same name as mum/dad or other relatives quite sycaphantic tbh. A friend of mine cringed (and guests had to stifle laughs) at his wedding all because his mum and dad gave him the same middle name as his dads first name, for ths sake of "tradition".

I like traditions and traditional names. Our DD got a 'new' first name and then her middle name is from both sides. If we have a boy then I would like to give him DH's first name as a second name.
I think to give both of your names to a boy would might be a bit too much.
And if you have a girl then please give her a pretty name, not one that you think is less nice than your own. Give her your name as a middle name and choose something else entirely for her first.

I've been pondering the same thing - we have male name chain on both mine and DH's families and for ages I have gone back and forward about whether I would like to continue it.

The eldest boys in my family are always called X, as far back as my dad has traced. my brother died as a child and so there are no more X Maidennames after my dad. Then in DH's family, the male name skips a generation - DH's Dad was called Y, DH isn't, DH's grandad wasn't, but DH's greatgrandad was (are you following? ). So any way, for us we think it's a good way of remembering both my brother, and DH's Dad as well as sticking with tradition and if we have a son he will be X Y Maidenname Surname.

Of course you know we'll have all girls now we've finally decided

After we had named and registered our DD (only child) my husband informed me that his name went back 10 generations in his family! It is a name that can be used for both boys and girls and if I had known about the family history, she may well have taken his name. I regret breaking the line, but did not do it deliberately. He (on the other hand) was obviously not worried about it, as he had not mentioned it ... and ... after all ... it is his family tradition.

Unless I had always hated it and felt embarassment about it then I think the tradition thing would outweigh anything else.

You can't really be thought of as narcissistic if this is a tradition.

Yes that's right seeker I live in the 1950s and am completely unaware of anything other than an utterly traditional set-up.

Most children do take their fathers surnames.

I would keep it. In a similar situation I did. Luckily I love the name. The tradition and family history is important to me. Coincidently, it is a traditional name of on both sides of the family - so lots of people easily pleased!

You're assuming that all children take their father's name....not so!

i suppose that they did it on the old days as they had so many children it must have been a PITA thinking of names the whole time.

Don't really get it with boys, if the surname is being carried on, why first names as well? Bit greedy innit. Men!

The name chain in dp's family I was talking about was just eldest son of the oldest son, so unlikely to be more than 3 or 4 around at any one time. So it's pretty easy to know which is which -"Patrick's got a dreadful hangover' "Patrick wants a Darth Maul lunchbox" "Patrick's watching Last of the Summer Wine again"

DP and 4 generations before him have the same name, I just did'nt want to carry it on even though his family tried to pressure us.

DP did'nt want to use it either because his middle names are well weird

In the end DS has his own first name (first in the family ) with DP's first name as his middle name and his surname. Kind of kept with it but they insist on using DS' name as a double barrell so that DP's first name is in there [anger] I have told DS not to respond.

I'm not a fan of name chains. I know of a couple of families where boys are known by a series of nicknames or their middle names (so that you can actually tell them apart) and I do feel a bit about it. I suppose that it doesn't help that they usually go down the male line, so that the person who gives birth doesn't get any say in how their own child is named, which gets my feminist hackles up a bit.

I'm also not a fan of the "middle name as dumping ground" school of thought. Both my DDs have family middle names, but we love both names and would be very happy for our DDs to use them. We know quite a few grown-ups who use their middle name rather than a hated first name and so we wanted to give our DDs a choice.

If you really love a family name (and wouldn't have to think up a bizarre varient to distinguish your child from the heaps of other Xs in the family) then it's a different matter. All in my own very humble opinion of course.

So consensus is with girls names it's a wonderful tradition, but men are arses. Just with names or in general, I'm not sure

My ds's naming mended a VERY long (as in hundreds of years) chain that FIL broke in a fit of temper when dp was named (if you see what I mean) He always regretted it and the pleasure it gave to the whole extended family when we mended it was lovely. And DS loves looking at family trees and photos and things with the long line of people with his name on them

Helped that it's also one of my favourite names - not sure what I would have done if I had hated it, though!

I think middle names should be family names and child have their own first name

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I'd only use it if I really liked it. Your boy option does look a little narcissistic and I'm not sure why you wouldn't use the nicest version of the name for a dd. I have a family name in my mix, and it never interested me much, but dd is called after two great grandmothers and rather likes that.

Spam that's a nice tradition. It's ok if it's the mum's name. It's men that are silly

I love the tradition of it so I wouldn't break it. I have discovered that my family had one but my grandparents and parents dropped it-accidently my brother got back to it and now that we know, it might get back on track.

I would use it. DD1 has a middle name that is from both sides of the fammily. My great grandmother's middle name, granny's first name, mum's middle name, sisters middle name.
On DH's side it is his great grandma's and Grandma's name.
I don't particularly like it TBH but we had to use it.

I know a family that do that, Eyeballs, loads of boys called William (Middle name) that are then called by whatever the middle name is. I agree with you, bloody ridiculous. If you have no intention of calling them by a certain name, why on earth name them it?

And to the OP, use whatever names you love.

We have a chain! Shall I tell you about it?

The mum's first name is the DDs middle name. Thus linking back through the maternal line as well, which is one in the eye for the chaps monopolisation of the surname IMO!

Happily my first name is also MIL fist name, so have killed two birds with one stone with DD1, now am expecting another baby and will have free reign name-wise!

I wouldn't break the chain - and not narcissistic to have the male versions of your names - no-one will know or probably even spot it...

It would be kind of odd for a mum called Georgina Roberta Jones to call her son, George or Robert George, but not Robert John.

Am racking brain for a name that can have different variations and cross genders!