Parents in law mispronounce daughter’s name

They're probably doing it to piss you off as they can tell how precious you are about it. Stop correcting them and let little Addie fight her own battles when she's old enough, if she cares to.

We had an issue with DHs parents when our first children were born. Not quite the same issue as yours, but something where we had different views to them, had asked them to do something simple which respected our view, but they kept pushing back. Eventually, I telephoned MIL just before they came for a stay and clearly, but politely set out our request for their behaviour during the stay. She had no come back, agreed to our request and respected it during the stay and from then on. Sometimes you just need to politely but firmly call the behaviour, set your boundary, and let the other person know what the consequence will be if they can’t respect your boundary. I like what a previous poster said - let them know their mispronunciation upsets you and if they continue you’ll assume they intend to upset you.

Oh dear. A mean person.

Add-eh-leen is prettier though. Otherwise it sounds like you’re adding a line to something, a spreadsheet perhaps!

This is absolutely brilliant.

Some people learn from the look of words, some from the sound. It is feasible that if they have another pronunciation attached to the written name they will ‘read it’ wrong every time. I know people who cannot remember words by sound, so repeatedly mispronounce the same word.

But everyone can learn through poems and songs and everyone knows Sweet Caroline.

Love Adeline (and Adela) btw.

They are unusual in knowing an Adelyn. More commonly, lots of people know a Madeleine, fewer a Madeline. A lot of people would get Madeline wrong.

Carry on as if you’re trying to help them - because there is genuine cause for confusion here. Be patient and helpful but very firm.

Yes actually you are right...my mistake, but that was what came to mind so how I would pronounce it is the way Op chose

The kid will definitely care. People mispronounced my name (making it a completely different name) growing up and it’s super annoying and feels like they don’t love you enough to remember your name.

I wouldn’t bother worrying about this. It doesn’t matter and your kid won’t care unless you care. My kids have relatives from different countries, we’ve never minded what they called the kids and no ones minded. They show they care about the kids in other ways.

Madeleine and Pauline don’t even rhyme… madeleine is also pronounced Line Or Lin while Pauline is Leen.

There’s a whole film ‘Age of Adeline’ where it’s pronounced Line. It’s the most common pronunciation.

I’ve only ever heard OPs way of saying it. I’ve never heard Adde-lin…

My DF's side of the family mispronounced and misspelled my name for years as they didn't like it.

All it achieved was that when I was old enough to notice, I didn't like them as I could see their lack of effort.

Turns out it was my DF that chose the name as well.

It amuses me that OP is calling her relatives controlling.

they flip between called her ‘add-eh-lin’ and ‘add-eh-leen’ more than her actual name.

So sometimes they say it how you like.

We politely correct them every time and reiterate that there are a few pronunciations

Every time? How tedious for them. Meanwhile, you aren't saying the other pronunciations don't exist or invalid, while it's not like they started calling her "Catherine" instead.

You are very stubborn about this & seemingly happy to escalate infinitely and keep it as a conflict issue. Do you know you'll encounter the other pronunciation constantly in your DDs life? Do you really want to insist on this battle with close relatives you can't get rid of.

When your DD is older if she doesn't like their pronunciation then she will rebuke them and get them to change. This is not a good hill to die on until then.

No one in my family who insisted their kid was Xxxxxx not Xxxxxy (variant pronunciation) as a name ever won the battle with all other relatives.

I love this! It’s a beautiful name op. I have French in laws and dd has a name, which is pronounced the same or near as damn in both languages. It irks me when some of dh’s relatives never made an effort with my name, which is only one syllable. So I didn’t want to be permanently annoyed.

This thread is baffling. I know several Adelines and they are all Ah-duh-line. I have literally never heard of ah-duh-linn or ah-duh-leen. There is no reason they can’t pronounce a perfectly normal and relatively common name. Tbh this is a game you will win long term, as your dd will start correcting them soon!

Isn't Adaline pronounced Add-uh-leen?
Rhymes with Madeleine, Pauline and Emmaline.
I would never guess anything else.

You need to ask PIL to please call her Addie.
Interupt every time and say ..
Please call her Addie. We want her to know her name.

My MiL struggled for ages with DD's name. No idea why - I guess it could be classed as 'slightly' exotic version of a normal name (It really isn't!!). However, I don't think she meant it maliciously & now calls her just by the shortened form of her name which she can get her head round.

SiL on the other hand consistently gets it wrong. Even when we correct her. It is beyond irritating but so is SiL. If we see her at xmas I am tempted to put DD in a t-shirt with her name written in big letters on the front & mispronounce SiL's name if she still mis-pronounces her name. Petty I know but I've reached the end of my patience with it (DD is 8 so she's had plenty of time to learn the correct name!!)

I like the idea to begin mispronouncing their names. Perhaps in a completely different and exaggerated accent?

Mispronounce their names constantly and with a happy smile. What a couple of idiot pills. Why hasn't your husband sorted this out?

Wasn’t she Aveline?

It's a toughie.
Rhyming with fine is the more common North American pronunciation, while rhyming with green is the more common European and UK version. I can see why the PiLs had a bit of a challenge. However, it has been 18 months, so plenty of time to learn it.
I think it's time for a blunt conversation that after so much time it has become offensive that they can't call their own granddaughter by her proper name. It's offensive to her and you as her parents.

No, but as I said up the thread, my own mother struggled with years with DS’s name. He’s her only grandchild and she adores him, but had a mental block, exacerbated by the fact that she clearly wished we hadn’t give him a name she considered an ‘old man’s name’. So I do t think ‘beloved grandchild’ status stops some people struggling with a name.

Yes I am of the mind that it's a genuine mistake. I immediately thought of the character in Bread so I got the pronunciation correct but in a scouse accent! Some of the tips about rhyming it might work. If they still can't get it right then ask them to use Addie

Is the child your grandchild though? My mother is similar, I’ve been married for 25 years, my mother still can’t get my mother in laws name consistently right.I’ve given up correcting her. She’s very self absorbed though.

That’s actually not a bad idea.

...get her to sing a couple of lines from "sweet Caroline", with "Adeline" instead, whenever they do it. It will become an earworm and train them how to pronounce it. Do not make her accept the wrong name from anyone.