Would you compromise on your childs name if it would annoy your mother?

Oooh - I'll take Crispin Cantsleepwontsleep. That would INFURIATE my MIL.

I firmly believe in not revealing name choices until baby is born and named. I wouldn't even enter into a theoretical conversation on the subject last time. Luckily my mother really truly loved the name we chose for DD (well the first name - she always forgets her middle name....). But I don't think MIL has got over it yet.

She wanted a boy and lobbied heavily for Jack or John (firm belief in single syllable English names that do nothing to 'rock the boat') so when we had a girl and gave her a 3 syllable Spanish name it didn't really meet expectations and she pulled some rather offensive faces when we told her what we had chosen to call our PFB.

Lets see how much we can annoy her second time around

MIL isn't keen on the name we are likely to give ds when he arrives. I think she should have kept her opinion to herself personally, given that we said we were almost certain about it.

She brought up the subject again this weekend, and suggested Crispin instead. Clearly her taste is to be trusted then .

Go with what you like.

DO NOT COMPROMISE. We were put under so much pressure to reveal the names we wanted for the dts I purposefully kept them under wraps. But as a nice gesture towards our families they've each got our gran's middle names, both of which we love.
When we told MIL, thinking it would be a nice surprise for her, we got the response

"Oh she hated that name, why don't you use [first name] instead?"
My response, "but we like [middle name]"

followed by weeks of "I think you should change it to {first name}" and "why don't you use [first name]? My mother hated her middle name"
Well, we hated her first name, so we stuck with out choice and the name is perfect for dt1.

You will not please everyone or maybe even anyone, so just please yourselves.

I'm not telling anyone the names we are considering. It's hard enough to choose a name that dh and I both like that works well in two languages, without trying to please everyone else!

I don't think my parents have been overjoyed about any of my dcs names (you can just tell, can't you) but they have never said more than the odd vague comment when dcs just born.

They utterly adore dcs and always have.

I wouldn't change the name. No way. It's not like your mother isn't going to love your child purely because of the name you pick.
We were going to call ds Brendan right up until the last week and my dad begged and pleaded that we change it as he hated it, but I wasn't going to just for him! Me and my dad are very close, but it's not his place.
We didn't use that name in the end, dp changed his mind (all on his own) close to the end and we went with something else that everybody loved straight away (apart from me!)

everyone hated matilda when i announced that was going to be my dds name and now lo and behold 3yrs on they all love it and everyone comments on what a lovely pretty and unusual name and now noone can imagine her being anything other than that, even the midwife felt free to put her two pence worth in!

when i told my mum what newborn sons name was while lying in bed off my face on morphine after section she felt perfectly free to tell me that she would not call him by that name and would tell my younger brother not to either, i was so and really i cried when she went, i never told her and ooh guess what shes now rather proud of his name and cant imagine him being something other.

god no
almost everything I do annoys my mother
it's just a perk of being a grown up

I have had similar from my mother. We like Harry for a boy and her Dad is called Harry so she finds it strange. I told her early on so she could get used to the idea. I think she will be ok as she loves her Dad, it's just that that is who Harry is to her.

She has not been so kind about my girls name Matilda. She laughed (in an irritating way!)when I suggested it. And said "oh no, stick with Lucy" (our other option). She keeps asking me if I'm still thinking of THAT name. Makes me want to use it more. She had her turn to name babies and I wouldn't have gone with her choices!

Eyeballs, that to me is a perfect example of an 'objection' that should be taken on board.

You and your husband particularly might think, who is called Caroline again? When do I see her????

But if you'd called your dd Caroline, then your mum would have a gd and a niece with the same name, which would be odd and confusing for HER.

Yeah there is a difference. Comments should be filtered. SOmebody can throw a big sulk, but what they mean is the name YOU have chosen for YOUR baby is not to MY taste. Em,,,, durrr.

But if for example my children chose the name of my x for their son, I would really find that very hard. Not hard to love the child. But hard that somebody I loved had that name. Hard to explain!! My children are in primary school, so I'm not going to worry about it yet.

Puddingchef, I didn't use a name because of my mother. We wanted dd to be called Caroline, which we adored. My mother wasn't happy because her niece is Caroline and we see a lot of her so she thought it would be silly. She wasn't arsey, just seemed upset at the prospect so we gave in and chose another name. A couple of weeks before dd was born she caved in and admitted it was none of her business and to call her what we wanted. However, by that time we'd been referring to dd by her new name since the gender scan and it was too late.

We gave her Caroline as a middle name but it's not the same... I have a v good relationship with my mother and it's important to me what she thinks, hence the change.

If I'd chosen a family name and someone else in teh family really didn't like that person, then I'd probably change it.

We ruled out a name for dd2 because one close relative would probably have taken the hump.

Nadine is probably a lot more unusual though. I know of only one. She is about 26 I think.

My aunt was going to call my cousin Meg. My granny made a face and said "Meg the Peg-leg". My cousin is now called Nadine!

None of her business, right at the end and I was overdue and bored we discussed names with my DM. She said......mmmmm not my favourite, to which I replied Good job he is not your child then.

She now loves it.

TBH it is no ones business but yours.

I would. I did. I ran Phoebe, Greta and Sadie past my Mother and she HATED them all. I went with another name. She hates it far less, and that is more 'comfortable' for me. I would be hating that she hated the name otherwise.

I wouldn't care about anybody else though, colleagues, neighbours, fekkem.

BTW, I can see where your mum is coming from. if my children ever name their sons after my x, their father, I will be mentally puking every time I have to say the child's name.

She's being selfish and out of order.

Is there some rivalry going on?

It's really your choice and if people object then thats their problem.

Well thats the way i look at it anyway.

Good luck
s xx

I would go for the name that you love, they will come round to it.

My dh is called Norman, so was his dad,grandad, great grandad ect.
My mil never forgave me for breaking the line,although I did give in and give DS3 it as a middle name,and he hates it.

rustybear- I just love the whole package- priceless

Fennel-