Baby name regret?

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

IridiumSky · 27/12/2025 03:02

Both are fine. Why not use them as first and second names?

But then what do I know? I’m only a bloke, and one who wanted Antimony, or Oberon, but after the wife’s veto ended up with James.😀

jeezaluiza · 27/12/2025 01:53

I felt this a little after DD1 - I’m also really indecisive, and we went with a name I liked rather than loved (because I couldn’t think of one I truly loved!). It’s grown on me more now than when we first decided on it because it’s hers now, I feel it suits her, and it’s fairly “safe”, which I think is good! She’s not been saddled.

However, there was another name that I also really liked that I thought about sometimes afterwards, for a good couple of years on and off - not quite regret, but a sort of wistfulness? Like maybe I liked that name more.

This ended up being DD2’s name, as I took that as a sign that I really did love it!

I think there’s a lot of narrative (and pressure!) around finding the perfect name for a baby, and loving it, and it being “the one”. Many people don’t have that - it’s about finding a solid name that a little one can grow into, that won’t hold them back in life. You’ve done that 💐

Both Ava and Imogen are lovely names.

yeahwhatev · 25/12/2025 20:23

I had quite intense baby name regret - I think it's a post partum thing. I'd spent months thinking of names (for twins), my husband hardly engaged, then came into the hospital with a name for our daughter that I hadn't considered plus MIL and UNCLE in law (I mean why tf did I take any notice?!!) both said 'as long as it's not a nickname' which sent me into a tizzy as I'd always liked Bella which was my granny's name but didn't really like Isabel. I also worried it was too popular but I haven't actually encountered any Bellas so things obviously move on over a decade (you might find that Ava is not that common in your daughter's cohort). We went with my husband's choice in the end and she definitely did grow into it - it's quite glam and unusual - but I think if I had my time again I'd have pushed back more firmly and stopped trying to please everyone. It's such a vulnerable time in hindsight. But in the end they do grow into their names - and they are who they are regardless!!! That said my cousin renamed their son when he was about a year old and everyone readjusted - so do what's right for you and your partner and forget everyone else!

FunnyOrca · 20/12/2025 14:05

amy480 · 20/12/2025 13:08

Thank you. I think it’s because the name is grouped with people going “ so many “Ava/Evie/Eve’s etc “ like she won’t remotely be an individual but part of a group that blur into one! That makes me feel a bit sad to be honest.

Show quote history

If it helps, I’m a teacher and have taught my share of Avas and Eves etc.

Each one is an individual in my mind. They are all different people with their own strengths and interests.

The only reason I might “lump then together” would be when trying to recall everyone’s names off the top of my head!

Original poster

amy480 · 20/12/2025 13:12

Keha · 13/12/2025 00:32

Both names are lovely, solid choices. I struggled with one of my children's names and remember how crap it felt in the depth of being post partum. I look back and wonder why I worried about it so much. My view is that there isn't a right or a wrong name and I have never experienced looking at my child and just "knowing" what the name should be or thinking you are obviously this or that. I found myself massively overthinking it and flip flopping about what name to go for. In the end for my own sanity I just had to say make a a choice and move on and remember neither was a bad option. I think children grow into names and my experience is that I can't imagine now my child being called anything else. Names are very important but I think we make our names rather than them making us. For what it's worth we stuck with the original "boring" choice, but you just have to make the best choice you can at that time and that's okay. If you want to change, go for it - but either way I think it's hard to know what's the right thing to do, so you just have to make peace with it.

Thank you. Exactly this, I don’t really understand looking at a tiny baby and going - this is the name that suits them. I guess maybe it’s a feeling some people get but I certainly don’t!

OP posts:

Original poster

amy480 · 20/12/2025 13:09

Tammygirl12 · 11/12/2025 02:54

If you love Imogen and are certain then I would change it.

telling family and friends before it’s the chosen baby name after arrival is always a mistake as they say things to put you off. That’s why you hold it close to your chest

Yep hugely regret giving anyone an opinion other than my husband!!

OP posts:

Original poster

amy480 · 20/12/2025 13:08

FunnyOrca · 10/12/2025 22:46

Both are lovely names. I wonder why you feel “popular” is a negative?

I think it suggests it is a nice name (lots of people agree!) that everyone will recognise for pronouncing/spelling and it can be a nice connection to other Avas.

I am also having doubts about my daughter’s name and I honestly think it’s part of the postpartum roller coaster!

Thank you. I think it’s because the name is grouped with people going “ so many “Ava/Evie/Eve’s etc “ like she won’t remotely be an individual but part of a group that blur into one! That makes me feel a bit sad to be honest.

OP posts:

Original poster

amy480 · 19/12/2025 19:34

Charlotte2411 · 12/12/2025 11:25

I can really empathise. I agonised over my 6 month olds name during pregnancy and then when she was born. Have been going back and forth for the last 6 months too. I really wanted a unique name for her, but couldn’t get over my love for Sophia. It is even more popular than Ava (which is very beautiful, my eldest was nearly an Ava). I looked at every forum and Instagram post and so many people dislike it because it is ‘basic’ or ‘too saturated’ but I just couldn’t help feeling it was her name. I think the time we live in now - being able to get opinions at our finger tips and social media name announcements etc really makes choosing a name so much more complicated and mind bending than it used to be. Theres this huge pressure to choose something unique, at least in my experience.

For what it’s worth I have 3 girls ranging from 5 years to 6 months and have never met an Ava at any group or soft play etc. My husband is a teacher and has only had around 5 Sophia’s in the last 10 years at his school, so what may appear popular on the official top 20 doesn’t mean you’re going to hear the name everywhere. I guess it can be location specific.

I think the best thing for you is to turn inward, away from family, friend and internet opinion and really look at her and see which name you think suits her best and what you can imagine calling her as a toddler, teenager and adult. Try and envision it in the future and see which one sparks joy in your heart. She’s still so young so if you think Imogen suits her more then there’s plenty of time to change it on her birth certificate x

Thank you for your kind message. I think your point about social media / forums / announcements etc is so true, my heart sinks every time I see someone say - ugh another Ava - so many of these ‘a’ names - so dull, bland, she’ll be one of 5 in a class etc. It’s made me feel like I’ve done her a disservice by going for a popular name and somewhat clouded my judgement. And thank you for sharing your baby name, Sophia is beautiful x

OP posts:

Charlotte350 · 15/12/2025 14:05

I really like Ava, I've been through the same thing with my youngest, the name he has was a compromise name, but you know what I still thinks it great now because it's his name (he's called Henry) and it's popular, although I only heard one when we're were on holiday. I bet your little girl will love her name when she's older

CrostaDiPizza · 14/12/2025 10:53

Elboob · 14/12/2025 09:55

Both are lovely but please don't call her Ava-Imogen or her initials will be AI and that would be hard to live with

And it will be Averimogen.

Sparklinggreen · 14/12/2025 10:29

They are both lovely, I have a slight preference for Ava

Elboob · 14/12/2025 09:55

Both are lovely but please don't call her Ava-Imogen or her initials will be AI and that would be hard to live with

Jack80 · 13/12/2025 10:39

Both names are lovely, could you not have Imogen as a middle name.

BlossomOfOrange · 13/12/2025 10:39

Both lovely names but if you’re not happy have the discussion about changing it, it’s definitely not too late.

Washingupdone · 13/12/2025 07:39

I do prefer Imogen, I rarely hear it. It doesn’t age but there again nor will Ava. Thinking ahead it will be easier for you DD to write Ava, when she starts writing at school.

Rottweilermummy · 13/12/2025 06:21

Ava is a lovely nanev and so is Imogen. Could you not have Imogen as middle name? Friend of mine had same dilemma with her choice but also thought bit old fashioned just had as middle name.
I had 3 boys and after agreeing on first ones name their dad literally had name for the next ones before I left hospital lol and I loved them both we could never agree on a girls name though

JayJayj · 13/12/2025 02:49

I prefer Ava to Imogen. And I would definitely not say Imogen is more unique at all. It’s a popular name.

CrostaDiPizza · 13/12/2025 01:08

Imogen is reasonably popular too. Popular enough to be familiar but not too popular. It's Shakespearean so a classic.
If you really do prefer Imogen you get a year from birth to change it. This

A friend was persuaded by her MIL to use a name she didn't want, but the child has always been known by a diminutive. (Something like Henry/Harry or Mary/Molly).

T1Dmama · 13/12/2025 00:45

amy480 · 10/12/2025 16:12

Recently had a baby girl (we didn’t know the gender) and I struggled to decide on a name (I’m naturally quite indecisive). I had 2 names in mind but when she was born my husband said she wasn’t either of those names which made the doubt set in. I also asked the opinions of close family and got negative feedback on the name I liked (Imogen). In the end we have gone for a popular name (Ava) which I have always liked but wasn’t a front runner until she was here. I now keep dwelling on the name Imogen and wondered if I should have pushed more?! Anyone else had this. For what it’s worth I do think Ava is a very pretty name and suitable for all ages (didn’t want anything too cutesy) I’m just concerned it is too popular and Imogen a bit more unique. Name choices are so hard and such a responsibility!!

Imogen is reasonably popular too.

If you really do prefer Imogen you get a year from birth to change it.

I’ve had 2 friends change their babies names - one just changed the spelling from Ayla to Isla…. The other changed her babies name from madeleine to Megan!

Keha · 13/12/2025 00:32

Both names are lovely, solid choices. I struggled with one of my children's names and remember how crap it felt in the depth of being post partum. I look back and wonder why I worried about it so much. My view is that there isn't a right or a wrong name and I have never experienced looking at my child and just "knowing" what the name should be or thinking you are obviously this or that. I found myself massively overthinking it and flip flopping about what name to go for. In the end for my own sanity I just had to say make a a choice and move on and remember neither was a bad option. I think children grow into names and my experience is that I can't imagine now my child being called anything else. Names are very important but I think we make our names rather than them making us. For what it's worth we stuck with the original "boring" choice, but you just have to make the best choice you can at that time and that's okay. If you want to change, go for it - but either way I think it's hard to know what's the right thing to do, so you just have to make peace with it.

Copperoliverbear · 13/12/2025 00:02

I prefer Ava.

reversegear · 12/12/2025 23:30

My DS is 18 and I regret his middle name, I was basically bullied by the MIL not to use a name I loved as she had bad connotations with it. Wish I hadn’t listened.

id say go with your gut and chat to your DH, whats are his thoughts.

Granddama · 12/12/2025 23:28

My mother always said 'If you can't shout the name loudly from the doorstep, without sounding like fishwife, then it's not a good choice!'

Hicupping · 12/12/2025 22:05

I prefer Ava to Imogen but it doesn't matter because they're both really lovely names, and you can take a smidge of consolation that you did much much much better than my parents.

Kizmet1 · 12/12/2025 21:55

Oh Ava is a beautiful name! Congratulations on your little Ava's safe arrival and I hope you're both doing well?
Imogen is also a really lovely name, but remember at the moment you're still getting to know this brand new little person, and I actually think a little bit of doubt over naming is a good, healthy thing. I think it shows you're deeply open to them being their own person and you not having all the answers about them yet.
I had a similar panic about my daughter's name. We chose Alice, and I love the name and she suits it so beautifully, but I second guessed myself for a little while afterwards.
Sending love to you both OP xx