Can someone explain the term ‘try hard’ in the context of baby names.

You have given names that are anglicised. However, if you're going to honour a long dead relative and call your child something like Anatoliy because you think it makes you sound more interesting (it doesn't) then yes, own it and your claim to be linked to that culture. Otherwise you just seem ignorant.

I'm always reminded of my friend from years ago who gave her dc an unusual Italian name. No connection to Italy, no adherence to the customs or culture - she and her DC just thought it was a unique name. That lasted until the first day of nursery when a little boy from an Italian family pitched up with the same name. They were the only children in the class with the same names- was v funny.

I think people who give their kids stupid names like that need to be taken out and shot. (Hyperbole, I'm not advocating for the death penalty.)

Amy Lee called her kid Jack with Lion as a middle name. Don't mind that, middle names can be a bit silly, but first names should be somewhat sensible.

We had a Calliope at my kids school back in the 90's - her family were from Greece so perfectly normal for them. I also knew a woman when my kids were at nursery who had a daughter called Pebbles. I thought at first it was a nickname but no, it was her actual name. I did wonder if she had been a boy whether she would have called her Bam Bam (Flintstones reference for those who might not realise).

I agree with your analysis - the first poster has a massive chip and doesn't understand what the expression means in this context.

It's about literally trying too hard to create an impression with a child's name - which doesn't seem to come naturally or 'organically' - as you say, something a bit too edgy or statement-y or achingly trendy, rather than thinking 'now what name would just be nice for my child?'

Learn the language?

So parents of Madeleine, Louis etc have to learn French, parents of Otto, Anneliese German and parents of Penelope have to learn Greek???

Trying hard to find a beautiful name that’s not overused is surely NOT the same as giving your child a ‘ridiculous’ name?!

What constitutes a ‘ridiculous’ name in your opinion? Princessina Salami or Willibert Poo? Those are ridiculous indeed.

Try-hard names are beautiful underused names that the parents’ ACTUALLY did try hard to find.

Excllent - use away if you think it makes you sound more interesting, but own it and honour the culture properly by educating yourself about it. Learn the language, visit the country etc - otherwise you'll be that try hard parent who simply pays lip service to it and whose desperation to be yooneeq shines through.

Now, see, that’s where we differ. To me, those names sound like the medication that’s prescribed to cure those medical conditions.

@MysteryNameChange Aso, just to add-it's great too that you will be sending your son to a nice school where his name won't be a problem, although you concede it could be a problem in a "rough" or "shit secondary school"

BTW- a bit of judging going on there-none of us are immune.

However, are you sure that he isn't going to end up working with these "rough" types who went to " shit" schools or, heaven forfend, end up in prison.

You won't be able to keep him away from "rough" types all his life because he may not spend his life in what you refer to as a "poncey liberal area."

But why on earth shouldn’t those parents use a beautiful name from their grandparents’ culture??

Surely more name diversity is a good thing. A name like Matteo or Katja are much more interesting and memorable than Matt or Kate!!

I love beautiful names that are less common And I’m proud to have ‘tried hard’ naming my children!

@BerryTwister , When a baby is born no one knows what their capabilities might be. They might be an athlete with couch potato parents, or a mathematician with innumerate parents, or a musician with tone deaf parents, or a best selling author with illiterate parents. By giving them a specific type of name, it puts them in a perceived category, making it harder for them to fulfil their potential
Those outcomes are highly unlikely. Your chances of being successful in those careers will to a large degree depend on your genes and parental support.

@MysteryNameChange , James for a girl is not lovely. The name is a boy's name and hasn't been out of the top 100 in the past 120 years.

Well, that's great but, to be fair, the term "behind closed doors" does rather suggest that you don't know what goes behind them.

It's super that you would not raise an eyebrow at a boy named Brenda, Saffron or Debbie Louise-it really is-but I am as sure as can be that for every one of you, there will be a hundred raised eyebrows.

I don't associate with people who snigger behind closed doors at peoples names, and I would judge that behaviour harshly in a professional environment.

I live in a poncy lefty liberal area I 100% wouldn't raise an eyebrow at a boy Saffron. There's a definite shift towards gender neutral names too for younger kids here too.

My son has a bit of an out there name and I admit it might be a problem in a rough school, it would have been in the school I went to, but I'm not going to send him to a shit secondary school.

It's the desperate need to be unique, rather than just picking a name you both like. The ones that are particularly amusing are the ones where someone wants to use a name from another country because one of their great grandparents (who they never met) came from there - they've never visited that country, they don't speak the language, they don't follow any of the customs, but they want to honour their long dead relative. No you don't - you just think it will make you seem you have a more exotic background than you do.

I think that it’s more middle class people trying to appear upper class, or at least ‘achingly cool’.

As people are not plaster saints and don't have wonderful good, non judgemental thoughts, it is what many, many people think.

We often take names for shorthand about a child's family, right or wrong and for that for reason many people will think exactly what you say in your first paragraph,

Should they do so?

No, they shouldn't but they will.

Not only arseholes but not so high up the social tree as they think they are. I always imagine they are the sort who call their daughters Callendra and Persimmon and their sons Henry.

To me it means trying so hard to be unique/ quirky/ different that it ends up sounding ridiculous.

It is derogatory. Just ignore them.

Name your baby what you like. Just be mindful of them potentially getting made fun of or it being very common.

I was born in the 80’s and my name is very common. In kindergarten through 6th grade there was so many girls with the same name we had use our middle names.

Yes I think some people think frilly is a bit try-hard for girls but I rather like a frilly name - especially if it has a more austere/masculine sound married to a prettier ending, like Henrietta.

Though that's not a blanket rule: I did meet a Donalda which I wasn't keen on!

I think it’s a fairly recent thing that people try to convey something about themselves by what they name their child. We’re intellectual / free spirits / love rock music etc. I think that’s what makes some people raise an eyebrow. Most kids desperately rebel against their parents idea of who they are as soon as they’re old enough, so calling your kid something which reflects your own priorities or impression of yourself is kind of self centred or vain and indeed trying a bit too hard to declare “I’m massively clever and posh cos I’ve heard some Greek mythology”

No, it really is not.

It is going to cause various problems and will be the sort of name that people snigger at behind doors.

That is without taking all the gender bender stuff into account.

There will be a fair proportion who will think she is a transman (woman pretending to be a man) or if she is not particularly feminine in looks-maybe tall and large-a real man who happens to resemble a woman,

It's a thoughtless thing to do and usually because the parents are desperate to be a bit different. They can't see any other way of achieving it other than through the name they give their child.

It's almost always girls that are saddled with this shite.

Those same parents won't call their son, Brenda, Saffron or Debbie-Louise.

I actually do know a real life Ptolemy. And a Horatio. I think those are a bit 'look at us, we are such fabulous unique parents' but tbf the parents involved in both those specific cases are a bit twattish. One of them for example, refuses to engage with the wife of another mutual friend because she's 'from the Colonies' (actual quote).

So, that's my association if I see those names mentioned.

I suppose at this moment in time they are boys names but they might not be in the future? There's a definite trend of going for more gender neutral names around here.

Better beige than screaming look at me, inflicting an attention seeking name on an innocent child.