Active discussions

Help protect children from gaming harms.

Take our survey

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

6.5 month old and changing their name

34 replies

koalabearboombox · 10/11/2025 11:20

My DD is 6.5m and gorgeous. We gave her a name that isn't super common but very pretty and commonly shortened to a nickname I really love. When I say nickname, it is also commonly used as a full name. To be honest it was the nickname I loved the most as opposed to the long version, but we wanted her to have a longer one to use when she's older if she wanted (to illustrate I'll use Elizabeth / Libby). DH really liked the long name (i.e. Elizabeth) but wasn't super in love with the nickname so we went with that with the agreement we could use either.

Most people, DH included, are now calling her by the long name or an alternative nickname (e.g. Lizzie instead of Libby). And the more I hear it the more I feel I want her to be known as Libby. A friend I confided in said it shouldn't really matter as it's a nickname but it's become quite important to me and I'm considering re-registering her to change it to the shortened version.

Is this silly? Should I just stick with what I call her and let everyone else use the longer name if they like? I'm a bit worried that I've confused everyone (including my older DD, who uses her own nickname for her, a silly made-up word).

I'm conscious she's going to be learning to respond to her own name soon and I don't want to confuse her. I also don't want to have to do the whole "her name is Elizabeth, but I call her Libby, but other people call her Lizzie". I just want to say her name is Libby and that's that!

I realise the answer was probably to get on the same page as DH from the outset but 6.5m down the line could really use some advice as to what to do.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Set a reminder
Steph4ne · 10/11/2025 21:19

Call her what you like to call her. My daughter is Imogen, I call her immy but she also has loads of other nicknames!! She will choose how she would like to be known in the future anyway. Don’t bother changing it officially it’s a lot of faff.
It’s a very normal feeling to worry about if you’ve chosen the right name etc. I feel like it sometimes. So don’t worry about it. You just call her what you like and let others do the same. It’s special if you like to call her something different xx

Luxio · 10/11/2025 21:13

I think unfortunately this is the risk you take when you use a name with multiple shortenings. She will decide for herself which she prefers as she grows up but you can't change her name if he father doesn't actually like the name you want to change it to.

I also think you're overthinking her being confused. Lots of children have multiple names and still respond to them. I think the most sensible plan is to continue to calm her the nickname you like and DH to use her full name.

LivingTheDreamish · 10/11/2025 21:09

Is your DH using your less preferred nn unconsciously? And then others are taking his lead? Because it sounds like you agreed on full name/your nn and he’s now introduced a third option which isn’t fair.

ViperHalliwell · 10/11/2025 13:10

Is her dad consistently using Elizabeth and not Libby, or is he actually using Lizzie? If it's just Elizabeth I'd say it's fine, although I'd think he'll eventually want something shorter occasionally. But if he is consistently using Lizzie and never Libby, and if he's referring to or introducing her as "Lizzie", that will likely confuse others and maybe encourage them to "do their own thing", too. As far as unrelated nicknames, I'd say it's normal to address a baby with a made-up pet name when talking TO her but if your other DD is introducing or referring to her as "Binky" or "Snookums", I'd probably correct her so others don't get confused.

How does her dad feel about changing the legal name to Libby? Will that make him stop calling her Lizzie (if he is) or would he see it as a kind of friendly riff/pet name for Libby as well? If he's able to call her Libby or just Elizabeth, I'd try having him remember to do that for a bit before actually changing the name you both said you were happy with. If he can't or won't use Libby, it makes no sense to actually change the legal name to Libby; you'd be better off agreeing to use a different shortening of Elizabeth that you both like.

KnickerlessParsons · 10/11/2025 12:56

Honestly, even if you had called her Libby, kids in school would probably call her Libso, or something - whatever name you call your child, you have no control over what other people call her once she starts school.

Sunseeker83 · 10/11/2025 12:55

I have done something similar to you. Liked the shortened version of the name, but felt like we should give the longer version, which I don’t really like. Unlike you, DH and I are on the same page, so he (DS4) has only ever been known as the shortened name, including at school. It riles me right up if anyone calls him the longer version though. Luckily, he (DS4) corrects them himself - just says that’s not my name even though it actually is. In your case if you can get DH onboard I would 100% change it. I would absolutely do it myself if it wasn’t for dual citizenships and two passports. At the very least you need to get DH onboard with the shortened name and then just use Libby. No one needs to know about Elizabeth at all.

Slothey · 10/11/2025 12:50

I don’t think it’s confusing to have a long and short name - it applies to almost every Liz/ Chris / Becky / Alex in the world. But it sounds irrelevant anyway - if your DH loves and is using the long version, it’s really not fair on him to try to change things now.

Auntiebenita · 10/11/2025 12:25

Her registered name is the least of your problems! Presumably you’d want your DH's agreement to the re-registering, so why not just have the serious discussion about the name anyway. You both need to be calling the poor child the same thing.

Get your older DC on board by telling her you need her help in teaching the baby her name.

Moreteaandchocolate · 10/11/2025 12:18

I would just introduce her as the diminutive you want and not mention the long name. Particularly as you take her out to baby / toddler groups etc. When she starts school you complete their “known as” name as well as their full name on the application form.

It will be easier if you and your DH are on the same page though!