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Baby names

Find baby name inspiration and advice on the Mumsnet Baby Names forum.

Original poster

Rafe

40 replies

gollyimholly · 01/07/2025 21:24

I love the name Rafe. But DH says it looks and sounds like "rape". I would never have associated it but now he's said it I'm wondering how others see it.

Is he right? 😭

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pamshortsbrokenbothherlegs · 02/07/2025 13:55

I have a Rafe.

I say "Rafe like safe" to people when they question the pronunciation, so that's my first word association which is obviously much better than rape!

And yes, it can be spelled Ralph but we had the same thoughts as you OP. A lifetime of explanation avoided.

The phonetic spelling also has a very long-established use.

naomicrobiome · 02/07/2025 00:22

Too close to ra*e. I like Rafael.

AnneMarieW · 01/07/2025 23:11

I like it much more than Ralph (which always makes me think of vomiting) - but yes, sound wise it is pretty close to rape, sorry.

Surprising I do still like it and it’s very rapidly increasing in popularity, so in 10/20 years time people might not link the sound so much (the way less people link the popular name Jude with the word Jew anymore for example or Violet with Violent - it’s all about how many people you’ve met with the name imo to what instant association you get).

I’d also consider similar Ray though - very cool now in a retro/hipster Ray Charles sort of way and somehow less close to the rape sound, again maybe due to familiarity as there’s a good few Grandad’s about called Raymond and lots of Ray’s on US TV which tends to trickle down to the UK. Whereas until recently Rafe (or Ralph with that pronunciation) was rare “public school”/UC name territory only.

Original poster
gollyimholly · 01/07/2025 22:07

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 01/07/2025 22:03

It’s pronounced Rafe but spelt Ralph. Like Ralph Fiennes.

I feel like if I spelt it Ralph, we'd forever be correcting the pronunciation - "no it's Rafe not Ralf"

OP posts:
Moreteaandchocolate · 01/07/2025 22:06

I prefer it as a nn for Rafferty or Ralph.

Needlenardlenoo · 01/07/2025 22:04

What about Rafa?

Blobbitymacblob · 01/07/2025 22:03

I loved it until I opened the thread and now I can’t unthink what your dh said.

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 01/07/2025 22:03

It’s pronounced Rafe but spelt Ralph. Like Ralph Fiennes.

songbird3086 · 01/07/2025 22:02

Not at all! Great name I wanted it as a shortened version of Raphael but I was over ruled haha

hyggetyggedotorg · 01/07/2025 22:02

I agree with DH I’m afraid, and also with the pp who suggested Rafferty as a much nicer alternative.

shoopshoopdedoo · 01/07/2025 22:00

I always think “chafe”. Which is better, but not ideal. I prefer Ralph.

FionnulaTheCooler · 01/07/2025 21:58

How about Rafferty instead?

Bitzee · 01/07/2025 21:58

It’s reasonably popular in our area so I’ve met a few and not once have I thought that…

ToKittyornottoKitty · 01/07/2025 21:58

I didn’t think that. But it is a really overused name at the minute

NormaSears · 01/07/2025 21:57

'Ra*e' is precisely my thought before I opened the thread.