Help me, I have baby name regret

Yes exactly any official proof that you can show to be using your preferred name for your DD will work is what we were told. We are in the process of doing it and hope to get it finalised this week. Ours is a different scenario than yours however it is the exact same process as it is still a change of name on Birth Certificate. We are not changing DS name as such but getting rid of the fada in his name as we didn’t realise this makes a big difference to the pronunciation of his name especially in some dialects which we have came across and people very irritatingly keep pointing out his name is pronounced different to what we call our DS so rather than our DS having to listen and explain this all his life we want to correct it now.

I've got a Ruby, I sometimes call her Rube or Rubes as she is an adult now. I never had a moment of difficulty in bringing her up iro of people "not getting the name, mis-pelling, mis-pronouncing ". It was clear that that was her name and it wasn't short for anything. It was easy for her to write in school, and she was known as Ruby and liked it, and still does. She has a really lovely more unusual middle name (not posted for outing), which she could have taken if she had wanted to, but never did. Our family often takes middle names. It is very hard in those first few weeks I know, but you have given her a lovely name, that will stand in good stead really it will xx

I’ve DMd you x

I love the ruby name. Ruby is the name of a pet I loved.

Ruby Kate is a lovely name! I always have great sympathy for name regret dilemmas but since you are leaning towards Kate, and she’s already called Kate, and your husband won’t budge, I would just let it be. See if you settle into Ruby because it’s a good name. And if it remains an issue you can easily revert to using Kate as her given name - no formalities required.

Oops just read your update! I’m sure you’ll settle on the perfect name OP.

Hi Op just to let you know you can change your little girls first name in Ireland as long as you can show proof you have been using her new name ie: if you choose to have her baptised use the new name on her Baptismal Cert.also register with a GP. You have to get a form signed also from a Commissioner of Oates declaring the name change. Our local Birth Registration Office gave me all info needed and sent me the form I presume it is the same process throughout Ireland.

Very much agree.

I disagree. OP needs to be happy with the name too. There is something wrong if the most important thing is to keep DH happy. A caring DH would listen to your concerns and seek a win-win solution for you both. Your views are equally important. Particularly as you carried baby for 9 months and gave birth to her. Could any anxiety/depression be due to having your feelings regularly disregarded?
It is definitely not too late to change the name and if doing so is the worst ‘upset’ and ‘trauma’ DH and family and friends experience they will be very lucky. What a frankly ridiculous thing to say. Likewise the advice to ‘definitely get over the anxiety’. Yeah, that always works - not.
Go you OP, stick up for yourself!

I’m biased as I have a Ruby who is also 7 weeks! And she already goes by lots of nicknames.
With my older DC I often use their middle name when I talk to them. And they also answer to several different nicknames.
So if you want to call her Kate yourself it wouldn’t be weird and she’d probably end up answering to both.
Be kind to yourself, it’s a huge adjustment having children and I know the anxious feeling of second guessing everything. Sending hugs.

I have a niece Ruby, she’s a right little firecracker. It’s a lovely name, you’ve made a good choice. Soon she will have little nicknames, and as another poster said you can informally hyphenate with Ruby Kate.

I much prefer Ruby to Kate.

My son’s girlfriend ie called ruby

she is wonderful so I love the name

Came to post this.

both names are beautiful.

also - are your feelings being respected and listened to by your partner and family otherwise? Or is this a tangible example of a wider problem of feeling pushed around?

take care of yourself.

Change it quickly before you have to go through a deed poll process to change it. If you change it before one year it is a straight forward process of just calling the office that you got the certificate at and changing it. Forget other peoples opinions, it’s your baby and only you know what’s best. All the best.

I didn’t like my DS2 name for ages, it’s was more my DH choice. I don’t think I called him by his name for months and months. Then as his personality started to come out I realised he really suited it. Now he’s 3 and I can’t imagine him being called anything else!

Kate feels like more of a nickname to me whereas ruby is more of a complete name. I much prefer ruby

Both my in-laws go by their middle names - you don’t need to change it officially to use the middle name?

Ruby is a nice name. Kate is OK too but Ruby is better.

@Lostandanxious I'm so glad to hear you're getting help. Be kind to yourself, it is a lovely thing to have a baby but a massive massive adjustment, and I think being anxious to be the best Mum you can be tips quite easily into just being over-anxious.

If it helps, I had massive name regret at the time (and very probably undiagnosed PPD) but years can't imagine DD being anything else. Ruby is a lovely name and I'm sure as your anxiety eases you will come to love it again.

I honestly think Ruby & Kate are both gorgeous, classy, stylish names!
I can completely understand how you’re feeling though - we swapped our daughters first & second names around when she was 3months. After all couple of weeks of her being born I just felt like her original middle name suited her better & kept her original 1st name as a middle name. I was worried what people would think but it wasn’t a very big deal at all … you’ve just got to be sure it feels right as you can’t really swap it back again!
Id recommend trying out both names for a few weeks, see what feels right and hopefully your husband will be on board too!

Both lovely names so you can’t really go wrong! Goodluck x